Do Dumpers Regret Breaking Up With You?

It’s completely normal to sometimes wonder if dumpers regret breaking up with you. If you recently got dumped, your happiness probably depends on this information because it gives you hope that your ex will one day want to communicate with you and get back with you.

It sucks, but when your ex broke up with you, your ex crushed your ego and self-esteem. He or she made you feel unimportant and hurt you badly. That’s why you’re now looking for validation which is information that dumpers regret breaking up with their exes after a while.

Although there’s nothing wrong with learning more about dumpers’ behavior, you need to know that too much false hope can stop you from moving on. It can make you think that all dumpers regret leaving their exes and that your ex will too after a while.

Some hope-giving breakup experts certainly say that most exes come back, but you need to know that dumpers who lose feelings for their exes don’t return very quickly (if ever). They return only if they get hurt and fail to create a happy self-fulfilling life for themselves.

Of course, there’s more to reconciliations than just that. Dumpers’ remorse also kicks in when you’re doing well without dumpers. Not when you’re dating highly attractive people but when you’re doing great and they’re not. That’s when they become regretful and want a piece of the pie.

This means that if you’re begging and pleading with your ex and trying to force your ex to come back, you need to stop doing that. Not only will such behaviors annoy your ex and show you don’t have your life together, but they’ll also make your ex lose all respect for you and see no reason to get back with you.

To make your ex think about you and miss you, you must follow a strict regimen of indefinite no contact. No contact means no texting, calling, or interacting with your ex in any way, shape, or form (not even liking your ex’s pictures). If your ex broke up with you, your ex needs to see that you’re independent, unavailable, and unwilling to provide relationship benefits.

Your ex lost all benefits the moment he or she broke up with you and decided to go solo.

Now that you’re in no contact, you’re most likely dealing with the post-breakup blues. You’re wondering how you can attract your ex back and whether dumpers ever regret breaking up with dumpees. The truth is that they do from time to time as some dumpers fail to find happiness. But it’s not nearly as often as people on the internet say they do.

Not all dumpers come back because not all dumpers:

• improve their shortcomings
• realize their dumpees’ worth
• fail so badly that they fall back on their exes

So if you want to know if your ex will ever regret breaking up with you and come back to invest in you, know that it depends on many things. Most things are out of your control because you can’t predict what will happen to your ex while he or she is away from you.

You don’t know if your ex will date other people and fail or if your ex will take things slow for a while and not do anything that could make him or her reflect.

If the breakup just occurred and it was a real breakup (not a fakeup), your ex will need to go through the 5 breakup stages first.

He or she will need to process negative breakup emotions and discern you weren’t the cause of his or her unhappiness and the grass is greener syndrome. You were the person who supported your ex and remained loyal until the very end.

Most breakups feel sudden, but the reality is that dumpers usually aren’t spontaneous. They normally think long and hard before they break up with their dumpees and focus on themselves. This is the reason why they feel so relieved after the breakup.

Relief occurs because they feel smothered for days or weeks prior to the breakup and need a way to escape a situation they no longer want to be in. And once they finally escape it, they free themselves from all obligations and enjoy their newfound freedom.

You need to make sure your ex doesn’t string you along with meaningless post-breakup messages. If you decide to communicate with your ex (even if your ex reaches out first), you’ll show you’re willing to be your ex’s friend. And that will, in turn, tell your ex that he or she can take as much time as needed to explore other options and not worry about a thing.

I’m not saying that turning down friendship will make your ex come back for sure, but it will make your ex respect you and leave you alone to heal.

This post is for dumpees who wonder if dumpers regret breaking up with dumpers after a while.

Do dumpers regret breaking up with you?

Right after your breakup, your ex feels no remorse. He or she is extremely relieved and enjoys the space your lack of presence provides. Your ex no longer worries about how you’ll handle the breakup and what his or her friends and family will think.

All your ex has to think about is his or her own life and stay distracted as much as possible.

This is the reason why so many dumpers appear unaffected by the breakup. They feel so relieved from the end of their suffocating relationship that they just want to disassociate from their old lifestyles and be completely independent of their exes.

This is especially true for couples who were together for a very long time. Long-term couples wish to regain their identity, so they go out more, dress differently, and do the things they previously condemned.

To dumpees, they appear unrecognizable, strange, different, and even fake. This depends on how elated dumpers feel and how badly dumpees need their exes to validate their feelings.

If you’re worried your ex has changed or evolved since the breakup, rest assured that your ex hasn’t. Your ex is merely exploring the world and chasing after external happiness. Once relief wanes and your ex loses the energy to do all these new exciting things, your ex will revert to his or her old self.

Sure, your ex will likely keep certain hobbies and friends, but all in all, your ex will remain the same person inside. A couple of months of relief are not enough for dumpers to change. To change, they need to reflect the way dumpees do rather than focus on enjoying themselves.

Will the dumper ever regret breaking up with you?

It’s hard to say with certainty whether and when your ex will come back. If you were truly good to your ex-partner and the relationship was stable and functional, your ex may at some point in the future regret breaking up with you. This depends on what your ex does and who he or she gets involved with after the breakup.

If your ex dates someone who hurts your ex and forces your ex to become nostalgic, your ex will likely remember that you were a better match for him or her and send you a message to see what you’re up to. But if your ex dates people who are just so so, then your ex likely won’t come back.

At least not until he or she has failed in some important way and reflected on his or her mistakes.

Some things that can help the dumper regret leaving you are failed rebound relationships, health issues, family drama, stress, depression, and a need for validation.

These things attract an ex back more often than healthy relationship. A healthy relationship is just one of the conditions for dumpers to remember the good times and return to you. It’s not the main reason exes come back as some people assume.

So keep in mind that dumpers’ regret kicks in when things don’t go according to plan for them. They become regretful when someone or something hurts them and forces them to look for validation, happiness, and stability with their exes.

So while you’re waiting for your ex to have an epiphany, portray yourself in a confident light. Instead of pestering your ex with calls and messages, start no contact and stay in it until you hear from your ex. It could take your ex a very long time to reach out, but even if it takes years, you must stay away from your ex.

Unless your ex reaches out and shows interest, your ex is of no use to you. At least not romantically.

Always remember that your ex has to put in the work because when your ex does, your ex will start to see your worth and value you for the person you are. An emotional investment is necessary because without it, your ex will take you for granted again and leave when he or she gets bored, tired, or preoccupied.

No matter how tempted you feel to break no contact and reach out to your ex first, remind yourself that you can’t be the one to take the initiative with your ex. Your ex abandoned you, so chasing your ex and hoping your ex will come back is a waste of time.

By chasing your ex, all you’ll do is show you want to be with your ex very badly and emotionally overwhelm your ex with your expectations and/or demands. You might even guilt-trip your ex and cause your ex to push you away.

That’s why it’s better to stick with the rules of no contact and let your ex come to you after a breakup. This is the only way your ex will see that you’re handling the breakup well and that it’s safe to reach out to you and see how you’re doing.

Breadcrumbs from your ex wouldn’t necessarily make things better, of course, but at least your ex wouldn’t be afraid of communicating with you. Your ex would respect you for keeping yourself together and may not give up on the idea of getting back together completely.

Do dumpers come back after months?

More often than not, dumpers come back months or years after the breakup. That’s because they need lots of time to process the breakup and realize that the person they left was actually good for them.

The more time goes by, the more time dumpers have to run into problems and reflect on their past relationships. Time is, therefore, good for you as it lets your ex do what he or she wants and makes it possible for him or her to hit a snag.

So if you’re wondering if dumpers regret breaking up with you and come back after months, keep in mind that they do. They usually return because they can’t find what they’re looking for on their own or with someone else. In other words, they fail to stay happy after the breakup, so they come running back to the ex who loved them and made them feel secure.

To make your ex see your worth and want to be with you, give your ex a chance to be free and do what your ex wants. Let your ex be free even if your ex is dating other people.

Remember that dumpers come back after months of their own accord because they can’t handle the stressors and realizations life throws at them. And because they can’t handle them, they sometimes return to their recent exes to rely on them for emotional support and validation.

No one can tell whether your ex will seek your help and approval, but if you remain strong during no contact and your ex needs your strength, chances are that your ex will reach out and want your assistance.

So for now, commit to no contact and wait for your ex to make the first move. You’ll know your ex wants you back when your ex invites you out, tells you he/she wants to be with you, and appears to be in a hurry to reconnect with you.

The real reason why dumpers regret breaking up with you

Dumpers regret breaking up with dumpees when they’re miserable while their exes are happy. That’s when they do whatever it takes to find their exes, contact them, apologize to them, and emotionally depend on them.

Not all dumpers verbally express that they want their exes back, of course, but all regretful dumpers non-verbally show that they’re in pain and that they want another chance.

That’s why all you have to do is wait in no contact and focus on yourself. Don’t obsessively look for signs that your ex wants you back because that’s completely unnecessary. You’ll know if your ex wants you back if your ex doesn’t let you go. At least not before your ex makes sure you don’t want to be with him or her.

So if you’re trying to figure out why dumpers regret breaking up with their exes after a while, know that it’s because they’re unhappy. They don’t like the way things turned out for them and need dumpees to show give them love and support.

All you need from your ex is to contact you and make plans with you. Everything else will fall in place on its own.

Dumpers come back when you’ve moved on!

Dumpers come back when you’ve moved on and no longer care about them. They don’t come back just because it hurts their ego, but also because they redevelop respect for their exes and realize they’ve made a big mistake.

Dumpers then become unhappy and want to stop feeling unhappy, so they find their exes and see if their exes still like them and want to be with them. If their exes are extremely excited to hear from them, they oftentimes get validated and stop talking to their exes. They feel too overwhelmed to keep communicating with their exes.

Only dumpees who don’t need their exes make a good impression on their exes. That’s because they exude confidence, which is the most desirable trait a person can have.

With that said, don’t just wait for the dumper to come back to you. Waiting is going to make you look desperate and will likely scare your ex off when he or she reaches out and sees you need him or her more than ever.

Instead, do what you can to move on and your chances of reconciliation will be as high as they can be.

Do female dumpers regret breaking up?

Female dumpers come back slightly less often than male dumpers. But from my observations, male dumpers sometimes leave again shortly after coming back. They get bored or tired and leave if they don’t develop enough love and respect for their exes.

Both male and female dumpers come back because they thought they’d be happier without their exes. Dumpers essentially discover that their exes made decent romantic partners and that they took their exes for granted. This then makes them anxious and forces them to get back with their exes before someone else takes interest in their exes.

Female dumpers tend to suffer from depression and mental disorders more often than male dumpers. Their unhappiness motivates them to look inward and encourages them to figure out if they’d made the right decision.

That’s because they’re in pain and in a hurry to stop the pain. You need to be aware of that so you know why female dumpers come back.

How to make her regret breaking up with you?

To make your ex regret breaking up with you, you must leave her completely alone. Allow your ex to experience life without you and go through the 4 stages of the grass is greener syndrome.

You can’t make her regret breaking up with you directly by talking to her and posting a lot of positive pictures. But you can give her enough space to think about the breakup and figure out whether she’s happy.

If she realizes you were the best guy she ever dated and the last guy she wants to date, she’ll want you back and reach out. But hopefully, you won’t be desperate to get back with her if she returns just to obtain validation from you. Hopefully, you’ll have learned your worth and will take the time to discover her intentions and whether she’s learned her lessons.

How often do male dumpers come back?

When male dumpers abandon their exes, they normally focus on enjoying themselves and not thinking about their exes. All they want is to focus on themselves and other people. But when those other people disappoint them or hurt them, something very important happens. Suddenly, they stop associating negative thoughts and feelings with their exes and start thinking more fondly of them.

They start thinking that their exes weren’t that bad in comparison to their current girlfriends/ex-girlfriends and that they need to see if their exes want them back.

It’s hard to say how often male dumpers regret breaking up with their exes because every guy is different. But we can say that those who get involved with the wrong kinds of people often do. Those guys realize that their ex-girlfriends were their healthiest and best options and that they need to get them back before it’s too late.

Did your male or female dumper break up with you? Are you hoping that he or she will regret breaking up with you one day? Post your comment below the article.

And if you’d like to talk with us about your ex and dumpers coming back, sign up for coaching with us on this page.

Zan

My name is Zan and I’m the founder of Magnet of Success. I enjoy writing realistic relationship and breakup articles and helping readers heal and grow. With more than 5 years of experience in the self-improvement, relationship, and breakup sphere, my goal is to provide advice that fosters positivity and success and avoids preventable mistakes and pain. Buy me a coffee, learn more about me, or get in touch today.