How Long Do Rebound Relationships Last?

The length of a rebound relationship depends on multiple factors, starting with whether the people involved are dumpees, dumpers, or neither.

If they’re dumpees (the people who got dumped), their relationship typically doesn’t last very long because they’re still hurting over the loss of their previous relationship and need more time to grieve.

Only when they’ve dealt with separation anxiety and regained their self-esteem is when they’re able to give a new relationship a fair chance. But until then, dumpees are far from ready to participate in couples’ activities.

They can talk to other men or women, of course, but they can’t start a meaningful relationship and bond with them. If they try to bond by force, they subconsciously look for their ex in their new partner, fail to find their ex, and as a result, suffer an emotional setback.

They slide back into depression and stay there until they’ve processed their ex’s departure as well as the end of their rebound relationship.

Dumpers, on the other hand (those who do the dumping), don’t face the same post-breakup difficulties. Unlike dumpees who stay hung up on their ex for weeks, months, or sometimes even years, dumpers are usually mainly or completely over their ex the moment they end their relationship.

That’s why most dumpers move on with their lives very easily and open their hearts to new romantic opportunities right away.

It’s sad to see, but dumpers often monkey-branch from a long-term relationship to the next relationship as if their previous relationship was a joke and meant nothing.

They seem to think they can do what they want with whomever they want as long as it makes them happy. But the truth is that they can’t or rather shouldn’t think that way.

They should put their happiness first, of course, but they should also be considerate of their exes and the people they hurt.

In this post, we’ll answer the question of this article, “How long do rebound relationships last” and discuss why rebounds end poorly for couples who aren’t ready for them.

How long do rebound relationships last?

On average, rebound relationships last around 2-4 months, but can last up to 6 months. How long they last really depends on the speed at which they progress.

For example, if rebound couples spend a lot of time with each other (let’s say 5 hours a day), they quickly get to know each other and become comfortable with each other.

They take their rose-tinted glasses off and see each other’s good and bad points.

If the bad points are emotionally draining, emotionally unavailable rebound couples as a result lose remaining strength and stop feeling attracted to each other.

They stop feeling infatuated (love hormones wane) and face the internal struggles that they’ve neglected and swept under the rug by jumping into a new relationship.

This brings us to the conclusion that rebound relationships aren’t defined by time alone. Time is just a factor that allows couples to become comfortable and drop their guards around each other.

Rebound relationships are defined by:

• the complexity of problems couples face
• personal strength and emotional availability
• how couples perceive each other and handle difficulties (behavioral patterns and perceptions)

Rebound relationships’ success rate

Rebound relationships’ success rate depends on couples’ emotional readiness – on whether they’re ready to give and receive love.

This means that we can often predict the success of a rebound relationship by looking at a new relationship objectively and see whether new couples are dumpees, dumpers, or neither.

We can then determine whether one or both people in a relationship are ready for a commitment and analyze the difficulties they’re facing/will face.

Below is a picture that depicts the success rate of a rebound relationship for the above-mentioned categories.

We can determine couples’ rebound success by observing the quality of their relationship from a distance.

If they’re arguing early on and showing various signs of long-term incompatibility, we can tell that they’re eventually going to succumb to the stress they put on each other and break up.

We can come to the conclusion that they’re not ready for an intimate relationship and that they need to grow individually before they can work together as a couple.

So if you’re wondering about a rebound’s success rate, pay close attention to the new couple’s relationship skills and emotional maturity.

If you notice that they haven’t taken the time to work on themselves after their breakup and that the problems they’ve neglected in their previous relationships are recurring, they’ll likely face the same problems.

Maybe the problems won’t be exactly the same because they’re two different people, but problem-solving skills definitely will be. People tend not to change and evolve without a strong incentive.

Why do rebound relationships feel like love?

Rebound relationships feel like love because they give us the impression that we’re loved and respected. They make us happy to be alive and restore our hope in love.

That’s why rebound relationships have only one purpose – to patch our post-breakup wounds and replace a person who denied us love and recognition. They intend to heal us from pain and suffering by getting our mind off our ex.

But unfortunately, rebound relationships tend to do exactly the opposite of what we want them to do. Instead of helping us forget about our ex, they make us realize that a new person can’t replace what we’ve lost and that no matter how hard we try, the new person will never resemble our ex.

He or she might have similar traits and look similar, but our brain can’t replace the past by getting involved with someone new. If we try to replace our ex when we’re still dependent on our ex for self-esteem and well-being, we normally regret it very quickly.

And that’s because we get overwhelmed with nostalgia and suffer from a fear of loss. Only this time (after the rebound), the pain can be even worse than right after the breakup.

Depending on personal strength and how much we’ve healed from the breakup, rebounds, unfortunately, trigger reminders of our ex. They make us realize that our ex is better for us (even if he or she is not) and cause us to miss our ex.

So if you’re ever in pain because of an ex and you want the pain to end as quickly as possible, don’t get involved with someone new in hopes of getting over your ex. A rebound relationship will likely only make you feel good for a short while.

But when the initial excitement wanes and reality seeps in, you’ll fail to connect with the rebound person and suffer as a result. You’ll be back to where you started.

How to tell if a rebound relationship is no longer a rebound?

I’ve seen so many people enter new relationships and leave them over the years that I’ve learned a thing or two about relationships. I’ve learned that not every relationship that starts quickly after the breakup is a rebound and that dumpees are many, many times more likely to rebound than dumpers.

The reason for that is as simple as it gets. They still crave their ex’s love and affection and hope that their ex would return or validate them.

Dumpers, on the other hand, don’t need anything from their ex after the breakup because they’ve detached from them a long time ago. All they need is lots of space and time to forget about their ex.

This means that dumpers are ready to start a new chapter of their lives with someone new right away and that their new relationship likely isn’t a rebound – a relationship that can’t start because one or both people in a relationship are still emotionally attached to their exes.

A lot of new relationships can seem like a rebound because they start immediately after the breakup, but they’re usually not rebounds. Especially not if couples are emotionally detached from their exes and feel ready to give someone new their best.

Very few rebound relationships last 6 months and grow to the point where they become serious.

Most relationships that make it this far:

• weren’t rebounds from the start
• or involved two mature individuals who were aware of their struggling emotions and as a result, took their new relationship slowly

This leads us to our next topic.

Do rebound relationships work out?

Since every monkey-branching relationship isn’t a rebound, it’s safe to say that rebound relationships do work. Their chances of success are no higher and no lower than any regular relationship.

They’re normal relationships. The only thing that makes them different is that they start quickly, often on bad terms.

The truth is that dumpers or people who don’t want to be with their ex anymore just don’t have a reason to stay connected with their ex. The connection is gone and so is their love, which is why emotionally detached people tend to focus on someone else.

On someone other than their ex.

Here’s when rebound relationships work.

The only time rebounders express some kind of regret is when they get out of the infatuation phase and realize that they’ve been selfish and that they’ve hurt their ex.

That’s when they contact their ex in an apologetic manner and try to prove to their ex as well as to themselves that they’re good people.

So once again, rebound relationships do work out when dumpers and emotionally ready/mature people are in them. They work because people possess the skills and willpower to make them work.

On the contrary, rebounds tend to fail when people aren’t ready for them and try to force them for the sake of being in them.

What to do if your ex is in a rebound relationship?

If your ex is in a rebound relationship, you probably want your ex to realize your worth, break up with his or her new partner, and come back with you.

You want your ex to make you feel better—and you’re prepared to do whatever it takes to get another chance with your ex. If this is what you want, I don’t blame you because most dumpees want their ex back even though their ex has treated them poorly and started dating another person right away.

The best thing you can do about your ex’s rebound or rather, the new relationship is to do nothing at all. Leave your ex alone by going indefinite no contact and give their new relationship space to develop.

This way, you’ll make sure that your post-breakup persona (the way your ex perceives you) remains undamaged and that your ex tries his/her relationship skills on a new person.

If your ex has lots of work to do on himself or herself and isn’t ready to date anyone yet, your ex’s new relationship will go through certain rebound stages and break apart when the relationship becomes difficult to manage.

All you have to do as a dumpee or a person who wants your ex back is to focus on yourself and remain patient.

When your ex’s new relationship collapses, one of two things will happen. Either your ex comes running back to you and apologizes for leaving you or your ex keeps moving on and eventually finds another person to date.

Signs a rebound relationship is failing

Some signs that a rebound relationship is failing can be noticed from a distance. You can tell something’s wrong in a new relationship if a couple is spending a lot of time away from each other or with other people.

This is a sign that they could be experiencing difficulties—ups and downs and that they require some time and space from each other to deal with the issues that their previous relationships created.

Another sign that a rebound relationship is failing is if the new couple gets out of the infatuation phase very quickly. If it’s been two weeks, for example, and the love and excitement are already gone, it’s obvious their relationship is on a decline.

And that’s because the couple’s love emotions have subsided and they no longer feel the mutual attraction that helped them come together in the first place.

The third sign of a rebound relationship ending is social media drama. Rebound couples often start strongly and appear incredibly happy to others online.

But when they remove pictures of each other off social media and start posting depressing posts, you can almost be certain that they aren’t as happy as they used to be.

They’re encountering problems and are as a result, remembering the times from the past.

So if your ex is in a rebound relationship and you don’t know what to do about it, the best advice I can give you is to stop looking for hope. Hope will delay your healing.

You should instead unfollow or remove your ex on social media and do your best to detach from your ex once and for all.

Is your ex in a rebound relationship or do you know someone who is? Share your rebound experience and knowledge below.