My Ex Told Me To Move On. What Now?

When your ex tells you to move on, he or she absolutely means it. There are no tricks or mind games behind your ex’s words as your ex no longer loves you.

Your ex does, however, want you to move on quickly so that you can find happiness within yourself—and eventually with someone else.

So at the very least, your ex cares about your emotional well-being and hates to see you suffer.

Telling you to move on without him or her may not be the best way to tell you to prioritize yourself after the breakup, but it’s also not the worst.

It’s basically a very direct way of saying that your ex no longer loves you romantically—and that you now need to look after yourself.

So if your ex told you to move on or to date someone else, your ex no longer sees a future with you and is no longer attached to you. He or she likely hasn’t been for a while as your ex has likely been planning the breakup for days or weeks.

That’s why you can’t reason with your ex and object his or her emotional decision. The very best you can do is to match your ex’s intensity and wish your ex the best in his or her future.

So if your ex no longer loves you and he or she told you to move on, this article will try to help you get your self-esteem back.

My ex told me to move on

It truly sucks to hear to “move on” from the person you love. As a matter of fact, it’s the last thing you want to hear and do when you’re still in love with your ex.

But unfortunately, love doesn’t work one way. It requires two people to exchange feelings with a similar passion and intensity for it to feel gratifying.

As a human being, you already know that love takes two to tango. It’s really no rocket science. You may just be too hurt to notice this right now.

So when your ex tells you to move on, your ex is already fully (or mainly) detached from you and wants you to stop demanding love from him or her.

You must understand that your ex just doesn’t feel love anymore. It died out some time ago.

All your ex feels instead is repulsion due to the fact that he or she can’t return your adoration.

To your ex, it feels as if someone has a crush on him or her, but your ex doesn’t feel the same way back. And because your ex doesn’t feel the same toward that person, your ex quickly tells that individual to find someone else.

Or in your case—to move on.

We can interpret “to move on” from your ex in many ways. But whichever definition you prefer, know that it’s not very hope-inspiring.

So if you’re still curious as to what “move on” could mean, here are a few equivalents of this expression:

• you will find someone better who can reciprocate your feelings
• I don’t see a future with you
• I’m seeing someone else
• I’m losing my patience with you
• I don’t care anymore
• I’m busy with my own life

He told me to move on already

If you’ve been trying to change your ex’s mind about the breakup, you’ve likely seen your ex lose patience and consequently compelled him to lash out at you.

Due to your persistence and a lack of respect and privacy, your ex likely reacted to your endeavor and responded crudely—further rejecting your calls for help.

Your ex’s retaliation most likely ended up hurting you again and caused even more suffering—which essentially made you crave your ex’s love even more.

And that’s how your ex-obsession began.

You probably didn’t think you would reopen your wound at the time because you were too busy looking for a way to close that wound.

If that’s what you were doing, I don’t blame you for trying to live healthy and anxiety-free. But you went at it the wrong way.

Only you can give yourself the importance and value that you possess. You just have to direct your attention from your ex to yourself first and everything will fall in place after.

This, of course, sounds easier said than done. But it’s not impossible even if you’re heartbroken beyond belief.

You must first realize that seeking your ex’s attention is never going to end well when you’re dealing with the dumper. As a matter of fact, you will only set yourself up for failure because your ex will likely reject you the second or third time and reopen your wound again.

And when he does, you will get pulled in a neverending cycle of pain and suffering that escalates after every rejection.

Your ex will, therefore, keep you hooked and make you want him to the point of obsession.

And the sad part is that it will only stop when you find the strength to step back and reassess your relationship with yourself—not your ex.

He told me to move on but still texts me

A texting ex-partner is essentially a breadcrumbing ex. Your ex thinks that texting you is okay because he wants to remain friends with you, but it’s actually far from okay.

Every time your ex texts you, it has nothing to do with reconciliation. It does, however, make you think that way as it gives you false hope and makes your heart beat like it’s on fire.

So if you’re thinking to yourself “he told me to move on, will he come back,” your chances of reconciliation are probably not any higher from those dumpees who stay in no contact indefinitely. They’re probably even lower.

The reason for that is because your ex texts you whenever he feels like it to obtain something from you—and not because it would make you feel better as a result. Dumpers just don’t do that.

I haven’t come across any who do, so if you have, kindly let me know. We’ll analyze your ex for scientific purposes.

Just remember that when your ex tells you to move on but still texts you from time to time, your ex doesn’t necessarily want to get back together. He’d tell you so if he did.

Your ex is merely testing the waters by trying to figure out how you feel about him.

What do I do when my ex asks me to move on?

If he asked you to move on, the best thing you can do is to listen to your ex and move on. Your ex has already moved on otherwise he wouldn’t have told you that.

Your ex would not have broken up with you if he wasn’t over you. He’d still be with you and continue to invest in you and the relationship.

So if your ex told you to move on but wasn’t over you, his words would completely contradict his actions. He’d essentially be lying for no reason.

That’s why observing your ex’s actions is the most surefire way to know whether he’s telling the truth. It’s even more accurate than listening to your gut feeling.

When your ex tells you to move on, your first and foremost priority is to protect yourself from getting even more rejected and hurt.

You can do this by following the rules of no contact.

Once you do, you will slowly but surely start getting a better perspective on your past relationship.

You will gradually—one day at a time, see your ex for the person he is and realize that chasing after your ex is far from worth it.

You’ll eventually come to the conclusion that it’s just not worth your efforts no matter how unique your ex is.

You likely already know that every person is different and special in one way or another. And that’s why you will once again find someone that piques your interest.

You just have to want to find him.

Your ex has moved on. You need to as well!

You may have had a great connection with your ex, but what if you can find an even better connection?

What if there’s someone:

• more attractive
• friendlier, kinder, and more respectful
• more caring
• more self-aware
• and better at just about everything?

Your initial response to my question will likely be, “But my ex was good enough for me. We got along well and we even planned our future together.“

Although you probably got along to some degree with your ex, it’s not good enough. Your breakup happened for a reason and so your relationship wasn’t all fairy-tale like.

And if it magically was, then you have nothing to worry about. Your fairy-like ex will without a doubt return to you in the future.

Why wouldn’t he when he can’t possibly ever again find a relationship like yours anywhere on this planet?

Well, that’s for you to figure out. But all in all, if you found a fairy once, then the odds of you finding it again are extremely high.

I strongly doubt you were “just lucky” with your first catch. As a matter of fact, I think you caught your fairy without much or any effort at all.

And that’s why you can do it again. Only next time, you will know where, how and what kind of fairies to look out for.

Did your ex tell you to move on and lose hope? What was your response? Let us know by commenting below.

Zan

My name is Zan and I’m the founder of Magnet of Success. I enjoy writing realistic relationship and breakup articles and helping readers heal and grow. With more than 5 years of experience in the self-improvement, relationship, and breakup sphere, my goal is to provide advice that fosters positivity and success and avoids preventable mistakes and pain. Learn more about me or get in touch today.