Is it possible to attract your ex back with the law of attraction? Can you use the laws of the universe to appear attractive to your ex and make your ex feel something for you again?
You certainly can. But we’re not talking about the kind of law of attraction where you sit at home, analyze your ex’s social media, and feel sorry for yourself. This isn’t the law of attraction that will manifest your ex back into your life
All mindless obsessing will do is put your ex high up on a pedestal, slow down your detachment process, and delay the time it takes to fall back in love with yourself.
If you’re going to use the law of attraction to attract your ex back, you need to erase all the hopeful “too good to be true” advice you’ve come across online and even in books. Various resources may instruct you to visualize your ex coming back and making you feel good. They may also say you should keep your ex close to your heart and imagine how great it felt to hold your ex in your arms.
But if you do that, I promise you that you’ll be doing the opposite of what you’re supposed to be doing with your post-breakup life. Instead of detaching from your ex, you’ll be attaching yourself to your ex. This will have a poisonous effect on your overall health and well-being as it will force you to stay in denial for a very long time.
So don’t just imagine your ex running back to you and everything magically working out for you. Thinking of your breakup situation like that may feel good because hope and denial always do, but they won’t tell the universe that you’re the right person for your ex and that it needs to bring your ex back because you’re the right person for your ex.
Obsessive thoughts and unrealistic hopes that are out of your control don’t effect your ex and won’t manifest your ex back into your life. The only person ex-thoughts and ex-dreams will affect (negatively) is you because you’re the one producing them. You’re giving them the energy to exist, so you’re pushing them deep into your subconscious mind and staying hooked on your ex.
Now that you know that obsession and desperation won’t attract your ex back, let’s discuss how you can attract your ex back with the law of attraction the right way – through detachment.
What is the law of attraction?
The law of attraction (LOA) states that we attract like-minded people. We connect with people who are on the same page as us as such people agree with what we’re saying and doing. They value the same things (at least initially) and like the way they feel around us.
But when it comes to exes, the law of attraction is a bit more complicated than that. Our exes are no longer on the same emotional wavelength as us as they’ve broken up with us. They’ve thought a lot of negative relationship-destructive thoughts, so they’re unwilling and incapable of desiring our affection.
As long as they’re processing the breakup and interested in doing their own things, they don’t think fondly of us and want to reconnect with us. Dumpers live in their own world, meaning that nothing you say or do will reattract them. You won’t be able to do it whether you beg them, ask them nicely, pretend you’re doing great, or play jealousy games.
When dumpers are done with you, they’re done for good. They don’t want you around and can’t fall for tricks and gimmicks. They just want to focus on themselves and disassociate from you completely.
So what do you do? How does the law of attraction work then?
The law of attraction will help you reattract and reconnect with your ex when your ex is ready to be reattracted. It will help your ex see your worth when you show your worth, exude confidence, repair your self-esteem, achieve things in your private/romantic life, and have something your ex lacks, wants, and craves.
That’s when the law of attraction will pull your ex toward you and make your ex desire a connection, reassurance, love, and/or safety.
Most LOA believers think that if you want your ex back that you must prove how badly you want your ex in your life to some supernatural law of attraction being in the universe and that that being will shoot cupid arrows at your ex and brainwash your ex into loving you. But that’s not how the law of attraction works on an ex.
I’m sorry to break it to you this way, but the law of attraction doesn’t care what you think and feel about your ex. Just like karma, it plays no favorites. If you think it does, you’re in for a rude awakening. One that could leave you hurt, obsessed, and disappointed.
LOA rules for getting an ex back
First of all, you’ll never get your ex back with the law of attraction if you don’t understand breakup dynamics and what your ex expects and needs from you. If you just keep telling your ex what you want and expect, you’ll just pressure your ex and ruin your ex’s perception of you.
So before you learn about LOA, learn more about breakups. Learn both rationally and emotionally that your ex needs space and time to deal with negative breakup emotions before your ex can find anything about you attractive. You have to understand that your ex already knows you as a person.
He or she was very close to you throughout the relationship and, therefore, can’t be tricked into getting back with you. If you play jealousy games, push-pull games, or pretend you’re doing great, you’re probably just going to annoy your ex because your ex will see right through you.
It’s unethical and hard to fool someone who knows you on a romantic level. So don’t think of the law of attraction as a means of convincing your ex you’re someone you’re not. Dumpees need a minimum of 2 months to make personality changes. Most of them don’t notice any changes until they get into a new relationship.
With the law of attraction, you can manifest love, health, happiness, and anything you desire. But to manifest something good, you must first become “someone good.” Only then can you attract an individual you’ll resolve relationship matters with swiftly and calmly.
If you’re a reactive person for example and don’t work on yourself, it probably won’t matter who you attract into your life because your behavior will bring out the worst in your romantic partner. It will trigger his or her fears, anxiety, anger, or the need to defend himself or herself and cause difficulties and maybe even another separation.
To attract your ex back with the law of attraction, the most important thing you can do is work on yourself and resolve your recurring issues. There will be no reattraction if you don’t fix the issues that broke you up. And if your ex does come back just because of pain or some other problem, chances are that he or she will leave again when old issues resurface.
So improve yourself and by doing so, increase the frequency at which you vibrate. Your ex will find you much more attractive if you feel confident in your shoes, communicate better, and deal with problems maturely.
You won’t attract your ex or keep your ex attracted if you appear desperate, hurt, vengeful, and develop trust issues. These things will scare your ex and/or perhaps even repulse him or her.
Your heart probably tells you to beg and plead with your ex and do all sorts of hopeless things, but you’ll never get the results you’re hoping for if you think that the law of attraction requires you to stay attached to your ex and take the initiative with your ex.
LOA works alone. Your interference would be unnecessary and counterproductive as it would force your ex to feel unpleasant emotions. The purpose of LOA is to accept the breakup immediately. Resisting it will achieve the opposite results. This means more separation anxiety and pain.
How to get your ex back with the law of attraction?
Everything in the universe is made of energy. Plants, rocks, items, animals, people, and planets are made of molecules that vibrate at a certain frequency.
The law of attraction states that like, attracts like. This means that you and your ex were once on the same vibrational level. At some point, you got attracted to each other and stayed on a similar wavelength for a while. Unfortunately, somewhere along the way, you desynchronized and couldn’t find a way to get back on the same level.
That’s why you broke up and had no choice but to pursue things and people you were better suited for.
When I say that you desynchronized, I don’t mean that you stopped being compatible. All I mean is that you stopped investing in the relationship and invested more time, energy, and thoughts in yourselves. That led to an emotional separation and exhaustion.
Okay, but how do I attract my ex back with the law of attraction?
To attract your ex back with the law of attraction, you need to start vibrating at a higher frequency. The higher the frequency at which you vibrate, the higher your chances of catching your ex’s attention will be.
There are many ways in which you can increase your vibrational frequency.
Your vibrational strength comes from within, which means you must change how you feel about yourself and how you interact with others. This can be achieved through the following things:
- meditating
- practicing positive affirmations
- helping those in need
- becoming a stronger, healthier, and happier person
- doing the things you love
- becoming more ambitious
- developing self-awareness
- controlling your impulses
- improving your shortcomings
- caring for the elderly, children, animals
- and much much more
Some of you have seen The Secret, a documentary movie back in 2006 or perhaps you’ve heard of the book with the same name. The franchise reinforces the idea that human beings are capable of achieving anything we set our minds to. We can achieve great things by wishing for something really, really badly.
One thing The Secret doesn’t mention though is that merely wishing for things to happen doesn’t bring about any results. Wishes are just wishes. They are essential, but they’re merely the first step in getting closer to our destination.
What matters just as much is that we take action after we’ve learned what we want.
The more we want to achieve something, the more positive energy we should put into
This doesn’t suggest that we must actively try to reattract our ex but that we should invest in parts of ourselves that we, our ex, and other people would find attractive. In other words, we should strive to become the best version of ourselves.
If you were expecting to hear some kind of advice that would get you directly entangled with your ex, you probably expected too much. You hoped you could say or do something that would bring your ex back, but that’s not how breakups work.
You need to understand that as a person, there are certain things you lack control of. Some of those things are your ex’s thoughts, feelings, and behavior.
You can’t help your ex change negative perceptions of you, but you can do your best to improve yourself in as many ways as you can so that your ex can notice your growth when he or she is ready. And your ex will be ready when bad things happen to your ex (when your ex gets hurt and realizes your worth).
That’s when your ex will reach out to you and feel more interested in you than ever before.
To make the law of attraction work, you must allow your ex to do what he or she wants with whomever he/she wants. This is called the law of allowing. It permits your ex to be the person your ex is so that your ex can think and feel what he or she wants. You mustn’t force your way into your ex’s life because that would backfire on you.
Be careful of what you wish for
It’s okay to want your ex back. But if you decide to visualize your ex coming back into your life, you could end up hurting yourself. You could stay brokenhearted and extremely dependent on your ex for validation and help.
This is especially true if the breakup is fresh and your emotions raw because that could make you fixate on your ex.
So if you want to get your ex back with the law of attraction, don’t assume that you must send a message to the universe about wanting your ex back. Sending anxiety out into the universe is just going to give you anxiety back because that’s what you’re going to focus on.
So instead of making things difficult for yourself, gain control over your thoughts and accept the breakup. It will show your ex that you’re strong and independent enough to move on and that if your ex doesn’t see your worth that someone else will.
The law of attraction is about rebuilding yourself and coming out stronger so that you’re better prepared for future relationships and breakups. You need to send positivity and detachment into the universe because that will give you positive results back.
So no matter what your ex said to you or who your ex is dating now that the relationship has ended, don’t deliberately think about your ex 24/7 and do nothing with your life. Now that it’s over, you have to figure out what went wrong and improve yourself.
You must increase your value as a person so that you can have a better relationship with your ex or someone else. Do that by writing down your shortcomings, reading self-help books, and becoming a better person.
Meditation
Meditation can help immensely when it comes to attracting your ex back with the law of attraction. Meditation can be effective because it allows you to relax and detach must faster than waiting.
So start by meditating twice a day for 10 minutes. It will probably be difficult at first, but the more you do it, the easier it will get.
There are many ways to meditate. Here are some simple tips that might make the job easier.
- Sit on a chair, floor, or anywhere comfortable.
- Inhale and hold your breath for 5 seconds.
- Exhale for the duration of 7 seconds.
- The key is to focus on breathing. Feel the air flowing in and out of your lungs.
- Calm your mind by staying focused only on meditation. If you get distracted, resume.
Positive affirmations
Practice positive affirmations throughout the day to get rid of anxiety and stay in control of your body.
Do that by learning how staying positive is good for your well-being and why you have to let the law of allowing do its magic.
You can think of affirmations or say them out loud:
- I didn’t want to break up, but the breakup needed to happen so my ex and I could learn some important lessons.
- I’m in pain, but I’m also learning and improving a lot.
- I can feel myself detaching from my ex.
- Each day is getting a little bit better. I can notice that I’m getting stronger.
- I’ve already grown so much since the breakup. I’ll continue to do so.
- I’d like my ex to come back, but if that doesn’t happen, I’ll be okay! Life goes on!
- Life is too short to waste it on my ex. I’m moving on.
Gratitude
Another great way to raise your value and attract your ex back is to start being grateful for the things you already have. That may not seem effective right now because your ex is set on leaving you, but it can affect your ex when life gives your ex lemons and makes your ex curious enough to check up on you.
When that happens, your ex will see that you’re happy with how your life turned out and that romantic relationships don’t define your worth as a human being. They just spice your life up.
So be grateful for everything and anything in your life. Express gratitude for the food you eat, the friends and family you spend time with, your health and education, and everything you’ve accomplished so far.
Each and every day is an opportunity for you to show gratitude for the things many people take for granted. You can practice gratitude by carrying a gratitude journal with you. In the journal, write a couple of sentences daily about why you’re happy to be alive and how you’ve managed to share your gratitude with someone else.
By being grateful on a daily basis, you will change your perception of yourself and develop a habit of being grateful. As time goes on, you’ll also start seeing yourself as a happier and perhaps even luckier person. Who knows? But do this right and you’ll begin to attract like-minded people into your life.
Do this with enthusiasm and you might even attract someone better than your ex. That’s because you’ll also develop an understanding of what you want and don’t want in your life.
Gratitude can change people and attract individuals with similar values.
Using the law of attraction to attract your ex back
One cannot attract that which he is not. If you think your ex is prettier, richer, more successful, or out of your league, you need to know that you’re sabotaging yourself. You’re making your ex into someone you don’t deserve and lack the mentality to be with.
So remember that you can only attract your ex back with the law of attraction if you’re confident in yourself and your self-worth. When you are truly happy with who you are, your ex will notice that you radiate positive energy.
It’s not a guarantee, but if you keep being your best self, your ex should eventually see that you’re not a threat to his or her happiness and reach out to you. Of course, your ex might just be curious about your new life and stop reaching out afterwards, but at least your ex will think you’re worthy of respect.
So if you’re planning on using the law of attraction to attract your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend back, remember that before you attract your ex, you must become worthy of attracting your ex. This means you must view yourself as a worthy individual and give your ex enough time to do the same.
If your ex gets himself or herself in a pickle, your ex will likely reach out to you because you’re the person your ex bonded with recently and used to rely on. But if your ex has a good coping mechanism and support system, then your ex might not reach out to you.
He or she could just continue moving on no matter how hard you try to get your ex back.
The law of attraction is not working!
The law of attraction can take a lot of time to work. Don’t expect your ex to come back in a few weeks because a few weeks aren’t enough time for your ex to process the negative emotions caused by the breakup. Your ex will likely need months or longer to do that.
It’s hard to say how much time your ex will need to realize your worth as every dumper goes through different post-breakup experiences, but you must be prepared to give your ex as long as it takes. Even if it takes years.
Hopefully, you won’t stay broken-hearted for years and will eventually let go of your ex, but take my advice and start letting go of hope and preparing for the worst. If you accept the breakup and prepare for the worst, you’ll be in the most attractive position you can be in.
That’s because you’ll be confident and won’t consider your ex to be someone you can’t live without.
You’ve probably come across the no contact rule already. If you have, you know your ex can’t be reasoned with because your ex feels victimized and convinced that the breakup needed to happen. The only way your ex will come back is if something affects your ex’s belief system and changes his or her perception of you.
That something could be another breakup, anxiety, depression, a loss of a job, deep reflection, or some kind of failure. You have to wait for something bad to happen to your ex so that the law of attraction can make you look shiny in your ex’s eyes.
Did you enjoy reading this article? Have you tried getting your ex back with the law of attraction? Comment below. and let me know.
And if you’d like to discuss the law of attraction with us, get in touch with us here.
My name is Zan and I’m the founder of Magnet of Success. I enjoy writing realistic relationship and breakup articles and helping readers heal and grow. With more than 5 years of experience in the self-improvement, relationship, and breakup sphere, my goal is to provide advice that fosters positivity and success and avoids preventable mistakes and pain. Buy me a coffee, learn more about me, or get in touch today.
Hi ,
I broke up with my boyfriend 2 month before, he says that he never come again into my life ..He is really such a nice person , he loved me a lot., I don’t wanna lose him. Am using loa for Abt 25 days…hope your article will enhance my confidence and soon I can get him back
Tell me which loa technique use??
Hi Zan,
Thank you for you article. It really helped me.
I was in the process of following your guidelines, when I had up speak to my ex and we had an argument as emotions were high.
Do I have to start the process from the beginning? I know deep down we will be together.
Thanks,
Amy
Hi. Thank you so much for this post, makes me feel hopeful and happy.
Is there a time limit though? If let’s say we broke up 3-5 months ago (I know its a big gap, but it took us 2 months to decide whether or not we are coming back together, then we broke off contact) can LOA still work?
Hi! I don’t know if its too late since it has been over a month since you wrote this, but don’t give up!!! I got my ex back using the law of attraction after a year of being apart. Theres no time limit!
My boyfriend blocked me in every sight also. now a month was gone. how can i get back him? what can i do for that? pls reply.
Same here. Be calm and believe
My ex said she sees a future and still wants to be with me and she doesn’t want to give up snachatting, occasionally texting and falling asleep on ft. Im going to do everything I can to be positive but she said if I cut her out she will really walk away. So should I still keep in contact and manifest getting back together with her? Im hopeful and certain we will but not sure what to do about the no contact rule
Hi Molly.
If it doesn’t hurt you to stay in contact, go ahead and converse with her every now and then. But if you find it hard to bear, cut your ex off and focus on yourself.
Best,
Zan
Hi Zan.
I don’t know how much I could thank you for this post.
One of my college mates seems to have had crush on me during our first year.She always stalks me and likes to talk to me. I could see she was interested in me in beginning. I was topper in class at that time maybe that could have been one of initial sparks for her.
With passage in time, I also slowly started to develop feelings for her & it attracted her even more. But something changed, I eventually downgraded in my studies & got arrear. I could feel she was something different than before but she helped me a lot in my studies, I scolded didn’t respect her, spoke to her with sore (or) anger tone. But in fact I was loving her sincerely but couldn’t express it in my actions. She was kind to me at first despite all these & was very helpful.
One day I proposed her from there, things turned downhill she started to ignore me threatened to block me but she didn’t and I am now like an cat & mice game where. one moment she talks to me & then the another she completely ignores me out of her personal life.
I once heard that she Complained to her friend that I am too good hearted and not mature enough & that if she married me she would regret that she made a mistake in her life.
Because I am also suffering a lot in work life & my personal Life.
Pls tell me what should I do. Should let go or else do daily affirmations that such a caring angel like her will love me back & eventually we would be married.
Hi, I think the answer is in your message. If you want to attract someone healthy for you and Keep a good relationship, you need to first focus on yourself. The right person, if its her, will Come back to you no matter what. You have to let go and stop playing a game of uncertainty cause this create a low vibration. You must trust universe has your back. She says you too good hearted and she has doubts ? What about you affirm to her who you are and what you want, and express that you dont like being ignored, that you love her but being ignored Times to Times is not healthy for you. And that you prefer to let go. Its true cause this slowly makes you insecure and not wanted… so this had to stop. Cut the back and forth communication. Go no-contact. Then, you must work and focus on yourself! Dont put all your focus on her. Dont think, dont worry toi much. Focus on you, you said personnal life and work are Bad? Why dont you work on that first….. Do some journaling, manifestation, visualisation about things that will make you better, happier. Change little things step by step. Create a high vibration on your own. Work on your best version of yourself. Once you start to love where you stand, you will be able to manifest that person back with confidence and self-love. You can still when you think of her just feel good, like you wish her the best, that if your love is pure, universe will bring to you. And then focus back on you. You got this.
Im telling you by taking the step of letting go, expressing that you dont want to play the game of chasing each other, and then you start to work on you and feel good about you. Things will turn around.
Me and my ex broke up 1.5 years ago.
I tried everything no contact rule and all. On 14th march 2020 ,I messaged him after 6 months . I want to give a last try with law of attraction. Please if anyone has the almost same experience,kindly tell.
Hello navya….I m facing the same issue dear…but u can try it by pure heart …it will really works..
We both were in relationship from last 13 yrs….but from last 4 months she don’t want me anymore….I think someone came in her life…but I want her back dear….nd u know what..?? She is jain and I m hindu….still I want her just because I can’t live without her …
Me and my ex broke up 2 months ago, I tried no contact but we still see eachother at school everyday and we have all of our classes togerher. Is the no contact rule still working even though we see eachother everyday? And doesn’t it make it harder to get over him?
Hi,
Does praying for the ex daily goes hand in hand for the law of attraction? Caz that reminds me of letting go or not and I’m confused about this.
It’s kind of holding him back or letting it go completely kind of situation. What should i do? Praying for him daily or praying once and then hoping for the best to happen on it’s own?
My situation is my former lover & I dated for 6 months & everything was amazing first 5 months. She became depressed & told me she feels numb etc. NC for 1 month & broke up by ghosting me 2 months ago . She has bad past relationship history & only guy she was with that didn’t lie or cheat on her. I would love have her back in my life & I don’t hate her . I’m assuming Ask,Recieve,believe, & Let go
Hi Joshua.
That’s all you can do right now. YOu can’t keep hoping she’ll return because that won’t do you any good.
Best,
Zan
Dear Zan,
First, thank you for this great website. I indeed found some solace the last weeks.
I have one question that is bothering me for a while now, even Eckhart Tolle can’t seem to answer 🙂
You speak about manifesting your ex back in your life is possible, which is according to what mr. Tolle says too about manifesting. But on the rest of your website, all over it actually, you speak about letting go of hope about getting your partner back, for good reasons as you describe.
But LOA doesn’t work if you do not believe you already received or shall receive in the future what you are trying to manifest.
But that would mean going against your advice of having hope…
Could you please clarify?
Kind regards,
Jantine, the Netherlands
Hi Janine.
Thank you for your questions.
Law of attraction is not about hoping and crying that you will manifest things and people into your life.
It’s about being your best self and giving them the freedom to do as they please.
That which is meant for you will return to you.
But it will only happen if you detach from them and get on their wavelength.
Kind regards,
Za
Hi..we broke up 2 months ago…i followed no contact rule for 45 days and then we met at an event…we didnt talk but i texted him to be atleast kind not to ignore each other n behave normally. He agreed to this and then we met in next get together where he talked very normally teasing me like before. Now how should i take this further to get into relationship? I am already manifesting since 2 months…everyday visualising, manifesting, praying and so on. However he didnt initiate a call or a text yet. This makes me worried. Kindly help
Hi,
I met a lovely man a few months ago, not on a date or anything romantic but just a meeting. He was such a sweet man and I expected to meet him again afterwards and haven’t since. I would really like to attract him back into my life so I can meet him again and get to know him. Is it possible to attract a stranger back into your life?
Hi Cesar.
It certainly is.
If your paths are meant to cross, then he’ll unexpectedly return to your life.
But until that happens, focus on yourself and do the things that make you happy!
Kind regards,
Zan
Thank you so much for your reply, Zan. Do you think I should visualise him coming back?
Hello Zan,
After 14 months and 4 breakups she blocked me on social media because I kept contacting her when I should not have. Her family and friends know how difficult it was for her to breakup and her pain from me not being the kind of man she wanted to be with. She thought I was it in the beginning. I truly love her but I allowed my fears, doubts and worries to destroy. I know she loves me but doesn’t think our worlds will blend. Is there any hope now of her return when a true love and caring existed before?
Thanks.
Hi Savoi.
You’ve tried getting your ex back the desperate way and it hasn’t worked.
Now you have to show some self-respect and leave her alone.
If it was true love, it wouldn’t have ended this quickly
So trust me. There’s someone better for you out there.
Kind regards,
Zan
I don’t necessarily believe they are not meant to be. They just stumbled into each others lives at the wrong time. Your reply contradicts what you have wrote Zan… what say ye?
Hi Rachel.
They are far apart right now as they both want different things. So unless their post-breakup dynamics change big time, they are far better off being on their own. Nothing is more degrading more than chasing after someone who tells you that you’re not the person for him or her.
Kind regards,
Zan
Hello, Its a really good article. I do appreciate it
I and my ex we broke up 2 weeks ago. We are planning to go to my country in 2weeks.
Anyway from 2weesk ago, we haven’t contacted each other, we broke up badly ( hurting each other) but we know we love alot.
Actually I am a big fan of Law of attraction , I have used too much maybe too obsesseed with him.
anyway, Do i need to think about he and I totally broke up? or still thinking we are connected.. I am confused
Actually,, We already bought the tickets and everything.
1)But Can i still just not contacting him and go to trip myself?
also, I really love him. and He loves me too I believe.
2) But I still think he needs to fix some of his faults… Do you think this idea affect my law of attraction?
Hi Sendina.
You need to focus on yourself right now.
Prioritize your healing, well-being, and improvements so that great things can happen to you.
Kind regards,
Zan
Hi, how does the no contact rule go if we are still living together?
We are civil and have 5 dogs together we decided it would be be okay if I stayed till the beginning of the year so I have time to find a place that I’m completely comfortable living and our lease will be up.
He has still told me that he loves me but he also has changed a lot and he is out frequently and comes home very late which upsets me but I don’t say anything about it.
Hi Cici.
It’s pretty simple. Talk about the things that you need to and don’t pester your ex about the breakup. Simply communicate in a polite manner and show him that you respect his decision.
Kind regards,
Zan
My girlfriend and I split 2 months ago
Any advice on how to detach properly?
And has anyone had success with this method
Yes I love and miss her. But I’m determined to become a better person, happier, positive and I’m already working with the LOA. Staying positive affirmations etc… we still have a little contact so should I cut it completely for now ?
Brad
Hi Brad.
If you want to heal completely, cut her off and self-prioritize. It’s the best way for you to become content with yourself again.
I suggest you have a look at some of the “how to get over your ex” articles.
Best,
Zan
Hey!
How do you perform the no-contact rule when still sharing a living space? He is getting his space by staying somewhere else, but there are things coming up that need to be addressed.
Additionally, we have expensive tickets to go see a comic we both love. We have agreed to still go tomorrow because he doesn’t feel right taking the tickets without me, but they were a gift to us both. Is this an okay idea?
Do you have tips for how to communicate during this time that don’t leave him feeling bad or pushing him away further?
I planned to just go and be civil and act as two friends would. Not bringing up any relationship stuff to take the pressure off of the situation. And then continuing the no-contact after?
Or even waiting to begin no-contact until I have moved into my own place in a month since we kind of have to communicate about certain things?
Hi Ciara.
Talk to him like a friend.
And depending on how receptive your ex is during this event, decide whether he still has feelings for you.
If he doesn’t, it’s indefinite no contact all the way.
Best regards,
Zan
Hi its not letting me post a comment…sorry for posting on a reply. Does it work if we do see each other. We have a child so its kinda regular. But im always optimistic about the two of us getting back together. Hes not so much. And lately i have been kinda needy. So i no i need to stop that. Plus he is seen someone else. We are broke up two years. But we have become realli close again lately.
Hi Melissa.
I suggest that you keep your hopes low and be the best version of yourself at all times. If there’s anything that guys get attracted to, it’s got to be a cheerful girl with a positive attitude.
Kind regards,
Zan
How does the law of attraction work when me and my ex girlfriend doesn’t speak or see each other?
Read again the article.
I’m in the same situation (7 years of relationship and she left nothing, this means non of her cloths, phone and so on, only with what she was wearing in that day to another man).
Telepaticaly you will “speak” with her
Hi Zan,
Thank you so much for this wonderful article! I will be referring to it again and again as a reminder to stay on track.
My girlfriend left last October due to a schizophrenic episode. We were working through anxiety and depression issues prior to that. My main goal is to help her get better and help her to feel good about herself and about life. I believe that the relationship will improve as she heals.
I am writing to you because the mental illness issues might be creating a roadblock. I’ve only recently started using LOA effectively. I had an interesting day recently on her birthday where I was led to her, (my wish was to celebrate her birthday with her). I drive for a living and dispatch sent me to a company just blocks from her mom’s house on her birthday. Something told me to drive over there and she was there! Her mom is in daycare and she was there alone. She didn’t answer the door, so I just told her how I felt about her through the door and left. In the past, she would try to starve herself at her condo and I would have to convince her to stay with me for awhile until she was better.
I feel a connection that is so strong with her and possibly from her. She has told me that she loves me.
My wife passed just over 2 years ago, (just 38 years old), and my girlfriend was a friend of hers. I let the passing of my wife go earlier this year and I’m ready to move forward.
Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated.
Thank you!
Keep the faith and trust in God that everything is alright with you and your girlfriend. I pray and wish you both well, more blessings to come. Keep moving..
I broke up with my ex cause at the time he came into my life, I just wanted to be alone after series of heartbreak. I really didn’t want to date and I knew dating him wasn’t going to last because I wanted everything that didn’t include him. The result was me not being able to reciprocate his love. I knew if I let him go I’d regret it cause he was really different and I was completely myself with him. However, I wasn’t thinking of getting married because I felt my ex before him was the one.
Eventually I did break up with him because I knew I wasn’t reciprocating the love he showed me and I knew I wasn’t being fair to him. He refused to let go but did after three years.
Last year I was on a date and like a match got struck in my head I started thinking of him, as a matter of fact I was convinced I was really in love with him.
The following day I called him and he came to where I was, I was happy seeing him and there and then u told him I was ready for us to get back together which he doubted cause he knew marriage talks scared me.
Anyways, we did see the day after and the day after but something was off. I asked and he said he had moved on, I slipped into panic attacks and anxiety attacks, my blood pressure got high and I just lost myself. I thought of him everyday, cried to myself, sent messages, apologized, basically lost my confidence. I saw him severally and i couldn’t believe we had become strangers.
I struggled to forget him and really move on. I even accepted a proposal from someone 20yrs older but I realize now that I was just desperate. Thank God I cut it off with the older guy.
Two days ago, I was in his city and I called him, he really wanted to see me, I did and I think I realized something, I was no longer desperate but one thing remained and that was that I really wanted, I really loved him. Our meeting was brief cause I was passing through but he said something, he said I’m looking good, that I lost myself at some point.
When I was leaving he brought out his hand to shake me but I gave him a hug instead. He asked for a kiss but instead I let him peck me on the cheek. I left feeling happy but I wanted more. The desperate me would have given him that kiss and obsessed about it.
I had been putting it out in the universe that I want him back and I will get him back.
I’m glad I found this page and will keep staying positive.
PS. I have been meeting people but he’s just constantly on my mind. Unlike when I wanted my other exs back, it was more out of the need for validation mixed with depression.
I have a good feeling about this one.
Thanks for the article, very insightful! One question though – how do you let go and detach while still visualising and believing that you’re back together with your ex?
Hi Georgina.
Thank you for the comment.
This is the difficult part. Time plays a huge role in letting go of your ex. Once you’ve convinced yourself that it’s over, your expectations will be significantly lower or inexistent, and that’s the most powerful state to be in.
Try not to rush it. If you’re still in the early stages of grief, you will just have to wait. There’s no way you can attract anything or anyone in a desperate state.
Kind regards,
Zan