My Ex Still Has Me Blocked After A Year

When an ex blocks you, it’s normally out of repulsion, anger, or frustration. He or she isn’t happy with your behavior or presence and thinks that the best way to deal with the uncomfortable situation is to force you out of it.

This is how many dumpers cope with uncomfortable breakup emotions and achieve peace of mind. They don’t know how to successfully deal with an ex they lost attraction to, so they block their ex out of their lives and enjoy long-sought peace.

Some exes drink and party and show how happy and relieved they are to be rid of their ex, whereas others stay grounded and live their life the way they always did. What they do and how they conduct themselves usually depends on how suffocated they feel after the breakup and who they blame for the demise of their romantic relationship.

If they blame their ex, they normally appear unrecognizable to their ex and the people around them. Their behavior and attitude change completely as dumpers feel immensely relieved and empowered by the breakup.

Fortunately for dumpees, most dumpers don’t leave their exes blocked forever. Months or years into the breakup, they tend to cool off and realize that their exes aren’t bad people. They’re merely people who smothered them and left them with no choice but to terminate the relationship.

When they realize this, they unblock their exes and continue to mind their own business.

By “mind their own business,” I mean they do what’s best for them and don’t reach out. They continue to self-prioritize instead.

Don’t expect an ex to reach out to you the moment he or she unblocks you. It probably won’t happen until your ex wants or needs to communicate with you about something important.

Your best plan of action is to wait for your ex to develop or encounter some kind of desire or urgency to converse. When your ex does that, you’ll hear from your ex and perhaps even get a chance to obtain closure if you still need it.

You won’t always feel this insatiable urge to talk and bond with your ex.

So if your ex hasn’t unblocked you after a year, don’t think that your ex won’t ever unblock you. At the moment, silence indicates that your ex hasn’t improved his or her perception of you yet and/or found a good reason to unblock you.

Your ex still views you the way he or she viewed you prior to breaking up or during and right after the breakup.

Is it your fault your ex is resentful and closed-minded? Are you responsible for your ex’s blocking and the lack of interest?

I don’t think so. Even if you said or did something you shouldn’t have, it was your ex who resorted to pushing you away by force.

Your ex was the one who lost patience and respect and cut you off like you never dated and meant anything to your ex.

Don’t blame yourself for that. You can’t beat yourself up over your ex’s inability to let go of resentments, negative perceptions, and toxic/unhealthy post-breakup behavior. Dumpers are very good at seeing themselves as victims as doing so allows them to stick to the story they fabricated.

The more they blame their ex and convince themselves they’re better off without their ex, the more control they gain and the happier they feel. It’s usually much later that they realize they’d been avoiding taking responsibility and giving their ex the credit he or she deserved.

Dumpers typically appear very satisfied with the breakup and may even act in hurtful ways. They show no remorse, let alone care for their ex and the relationship they just came out of. All they care about is their own happiness and the people who contribute to their lives.

If dumpees notice their ex hasn’t been impacted by the breakup the way they have, they more often than not take their ex’s behavior personally and think they’re solely responsible for the situation they’re in.

Why wouldn’t they feel responsible when their ex is having a great time without them?

Social media platforms often make things worse as they allow dumpees to stalk their exes. They help dumpees gain insight into their ex’s life and provide them with a sense of control. In other words, social networking services hinder dumpees’ ability to detach as they give dumpees hope to latch on to.

You may not like being blocked, but you need to understand that being blocked or unfriended by your ex is a blessing in disguise. It helps you keep your ex out of sight, which consequently, takes your focus away from obsessive thoughts and negative feelings.

The longer you go without thinking about your ex, the more emotional progress you make and the happier you feel.

So if your ex still has you blocked after a year, don’t think it’s a bad thing, that you’re a bad person, or that you should have done something (differently) to make your ex forgive you and see your ability to grow. If you got dumped and are in no contact, your ex’s life is no longer in your power to control.

It’s in your ex’s control as your ex gets to decide whether your ex needs you and respects you enough to unblock you. It’s not about whether you’re a good/valuable person but whether your ex thinks you are and cares about that.

Today’s article is for dumpees who want to know what it means when an ex-ex still has them blocked after a year. We’ll discuss what you should and shouldn’t do if you want to get unblocked by your ex.

Why hasn’t my ex unblocked me after a year?

Whether the breakup happened a year ago or you got blocked a year ago, your ex’s reason for keeping you blocked is very simple. This may not be the most dumpee-friendly explanation, but your ex is doing okay.

I don’t mean that your ex is finally happy now that you’re out of his or her life but that your ex hasn’t experienced something painful that would allow your ex to reflect.

Your ex has had a relatively easy life for the past year and didn’t see a reason to indulge in nostalgia and unblock you. Sure, your ex probably isn’t as angry as he or she used to be as emotions such as anger tend to wane over time, but your ex is still holding on to the bad memories.

He or she remembers them so vividly that unblocking you wouldn’t make any sense to your ex. It would risk sending you a message that your ex is ready to engage in meaningless conversation and be friends (or more).

And that’s not where your ex is emotionally and respect-wise. Respect-wise, your ex is still in a bad place. A place where any form of communication with you makes your ex feel uncomfortable.

You need to understand that time doesn’t always fix breakup problems and resentments. Time merely provides an opportunity for negativity to wane, bad memories to fade, and the grass is greener syndrome to be discovered.

Time allows dumpers to get hurt and/or reflect. Don’t think that dumpers come back because months or years go by. Breakups and reconciliations are much more complicated than that as they require a healthy mindset and the ability to deal with the past.

Some things a dumper needs to unblock the dumpee and/or come back are:

• a positive relationship mentality
• self-awareness
• emotional maturity
• healthy perceptions of the dumpee
• lots of space and understanding from the dumpee

If the dumper doesn’t remember the good times and admit his or her ex is worthy of respect, you can forget about getting unblocked any time soon. The dumper probably won’t unblock you in the near future because there will be no guilt, shame, or morality pushing him or her to do the right thing.

The dumper will need to unblock you in other ways – by being forced to grow and unblock as he or she currently doesn’t possess the capacity to reflect and/or see things from a different angle. In other words, something painful and unpredictable will have to happen to the dumper to shock the dumper and shape him or her into a wiser individual.

Here are some things that could make dumpers start thinking more fondly of their ex and allow or force them to unblock their ex.

Some dumpers think that an ex is an ex for a reason and that they shouldn’t unblock their ex for no reason. They believe they should stick to their breakup decision and stay in control of the breakup by keeping their ex blocked.

Therefore, we should ask the following question; when do dumpers experience a loss of control?

Fortunately, there are numerous straightforward answers to this question.

Dumpers lose control when they:

• aren’t happy and fulfilled in life
• see that their ex is doing well and want their ex’s happiness for themselves
• need their ex to help them reach their goals
• worry about their health and safety
• become afraid of losing their ex to someone else

If your ex still has you blocked after a year, your ex might already be in a new relationship and doesn’t want to unblock you just because a year has gone by. Your ex might think that unblocking you could encourage you to reach out and ruin his or her new relationship and happiness.

Your ex would probably rather not gamble with happiness unless your ex knows his or her relationship is stable and can withstand communication with an old flame.

So if you’re trying to figure out why your ex hasn’t unblocked you after a year of being blocked, know that a year is just a year (a number). And numbers don’t change the way your ex is as a person.

Experiences (especially bad ones), education, conversations with emotionally mature idols, and acts of realization make it possible for dumpers to grow morally and behaviorally. Don’t expect growth to occur with time alone as people grow at a very slow rate.

For the most part, it’s their thinking that successfully encourages them to transform themselves.

What to do if your ex still has you blocked after a year?

If it’s been a year since you got blocked, don’t think that your ex has forgotten you’re still blocked and that you need to remind your ex to unblock you. Your ex may not think about you every day, but your ex certainly remembers that he or she took your ability to express yourself and communicate away.

Your ex would have to have terrible memory or quite frankly, be demented not to recall blocking you.

We can sugarcoat the situation day and night, but the problem is that your ex doesn’t want to talk with you. Your ex prefers to keep things the way they are and continue to enjoy peace and quiet.

Maybe your ex is ready to converse with you, but the desire to do that is lacking. Whatever the case may be, there’s no need to reach out to your ex on platforms you aren’t blocked on yet or ask your ex’s friends to unblock you. That would be a very self-degrading move as your ex was the one who blocked you and should be taking the initiative.

You, on the other hand, should be doing your best to stay away from your ex and come to terms with the blocking.

It will take time for your ex to unblock you. I can’t say how long it will take, but here are some of the things that will likely delay it.

• Breakup mistakes
• Stalking your ex in person
• Posting depressing things on social media
• Talking badly about your ex or telling them you’re lost without your ex
• Trying to make your ex jealous
• And pretending to be someone you’re not and shouldn’t be

Personality and lifestyle-wise, your ex knows you. You can’t fool your ex (and shouldn’t even try to) by pretending to be rich, successful, confident, famous, extremely attractive, and someone you’re not. If you try to trick your ex into thinking you’re living an abundant life and having the time of your life now that your ex is gone, you won’t make your ex envy you and miss you.

The plan will most likely backfire because your ex will see right through you and/or get annoyed by you. You must remember that no blocking dumper wants to see an overexposed dumpee with a pretentious, boastful, and arrogant attitude.

The best thing you can do for your ex and yourself is to be your true self. Not only is this highly attractive to others, but it also humbles you and gives room for growth to occur.

Many dumpees are so hurt by their exes’ blocking that they try to force their ex to unblock them. They’re so shocked by their ex’s never before seen behavior that they take matters into their own hands and try to handle an emotional problem rationally.

Sadly, this further traps their unhappy/suffocated dumper and strengthens their ex’s decision for dumping them.

So if you want to get unblocked, don’t try to force your ex to unblock you. Remember that your ex blocked you voluntarily and that he or she needs to unblock you voluntarily as well.

Your ex needs to do that for love and respect to grow.

Does your ex still have you blocked after a year? Why do you think your ex hasn’t unblocked you yet? Let us know what you think in the comments below.

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Zan

My name is Zan and I’m the founder of Magnet of Success. I enjoy writing realistic relationship and breakup articles and helping readers heal and grow. With more than 5 years of experience in the self-improvement, relationship, and breakup sphere, my goal is to provide advice that fosters positivity and success and avoids preventable mistakes and pain. Buy me a coffee, learn more about me, or get in touch today.