How To Make Your Ex Jealous With Psychology?

Before you try to make your ex jealous, bear in mind that jealousy has a low chance of bringing your ex back. It has a bigger chance of angering your ex and making your ex want nothing to do with you.

If you rub a new person in your ex’s face, your ex probably won’t get insecure and message you to secure a spot in a relationship with you (only young and immature people do that). Your ex will likely get annoyed and unfollow or block you.

It depends on how much you show off and how your ex deals with braggy behavior.

If your ex despises it and thinks you’re trying to get a reaction out of him or her, your ex will probably lose his or her patience and do something you’re not ready for – something that decreases his or her interest in you.

That will devastate your hopeful heart and make you even hungrier for attention and reassurance.

If you try to make your ex jealous, your ex could also compete with you. It would be immature, but your ex could reveal someone new on social media and profess his or her love and gratitude to that person.

Needless to say, you shouldn’t play jealousy games with an ex. You especially shouldn’t play them if you’re not emotionally ready for your ex to play with you and affect your self-esteem.

It’s safer for you to practice acceptance and do your best to detach. Yes, it’s hard to let go of control when you’re starving for validation from an ex who rejected you, but you don’t have a choice.

You can either try to make your ex jealous and risk getting (more) jealous and hurt in return or let your ex be happy on his or her own or with someone else. Your dumper ex feels elated now that the breakup happened and may even be infatuated with another person.

You won’t be able to make your ex jealous as long as your ex feels free and is glad that things turned out the way they did. Your ex could get jealous or envious later after he or she has processed the separation, failed to find happiness, and discovered your romantic value.

But that could take a while. It could take years or longer.

When/if it happens, you’ll make your ex jealous without even trying. Simply talking to a person of your preferred gender will make your ex think you’re successful and that others find you attractive. This is because your ex will think that his or her life is not as good as yours and that your ex is missing out on someone great.

So if you want to know how to make your ex jealous with basic psychology, bear in mind that you can make your ex jealous only when your ex is still attached to you or when your ex’s (romantic) life is worse than yours.

You can trigger your ex’s insecurities if your ex isn’t dating, had a bad date, thinks positively about you, has poor self-esteem, or competes with you. Jealousy probably won’t make your ex come running back unless your ex fails to understand why he or she feels insecure and wants you back to avoid feeling left behind.

You must understand that your ex couldn’t wait to break up with you. He or she had been wanting to escape the relationship for so long that jumping back into a relationship with you frightens your ex. It makes your ex scared to be with you and relieved and excited to talk to other people.

Hence, your ex may not even get jealous. Your ex may just think you’re bragging and trying to show people that your ex is replaceable. If your ex does feel insecure, a little bit of jealousy probably won’t have the effect you want it to have.

It won’t make your ex feel how you feel because your ex is going through the dumper stages rather than the dumpee stages. You’re both going through different post-breakup stages and mental/emotional processes.

With the warning out of the way, let’s now discuss how to make your ex jealous with the power of psychology.

Don’t entertain your ex

If your ex keeps talking to you after the breakup, the first thing you should do is cut your ex off. Go no contact with your ex and show your ex that he or she is no longer your interest, let alone a priority.

This won’t make your ex crazy for you (your ex doesn’t need your validation), but it will give your ex more space than he or she bargained for.

It will make your ex see that he or she has lost all aspects of you (not just the romantic one) and that you have no intention of letting yourself be strung along.

The longer you leave your ex alone, the stronger you’ll appear and the less you’ll feel that you need your ex in your life to be happy. No contact will give your ex plenty of space and time to think things through.

It will stay with your ex from the moment your ex breaks up with you and feels relieved till the moment your ex processes negative breakup emotions and stops feeling smothered by you and thinking you’re the worst person on the planet.

Of course, not all exes think that way, but they do perceive their ex as someone they can’t connect and envision a future with. That’s why they must be kept at a distance and allowed to experience the world they wish to experience.

They must have total freedom otherwise they feel disrespected and don’t feel jealous of their ex’s happiness and romantic success. In other words, they aren’t allowed to reflect and compare their post-breakup happiness and success to their ex.

It’s important to let dumpers do what they want with whomever they want. Time alone usually doesn’t change their feelings and decisions. All it does is allow them to be free and see if the grass is greener on the other side.

If it is (or if it’s about the same), they stay on the other side and think they’ve made the right decision. But if they fail to secure happiness without their ex, they look at their ex as their rescuer and become curious about their ex.

The distance in no contact makes their ex look mysterious, decisive, and capable of helping people who overestimated themselves and underestimated their ex.

You can’t make your ex jealous if you’re always in your ex’s face, letting your ex know what you’re up to. You especially can’t make your ex jealous if you tell your ex how you feel and express the desire to get back together.

No dumper wants, nor deserves to know that his or her dumpee has feelings and romantic expectations. If the dumper knows the dumpee wants to get back together, he or she loses respect for the dumpee and pushes the dumpee away.

Usually, he or she does this by replying slowly, ignoring, saying mean things, or blocking.

Work on yourself

Self-improvement on its own also won’t make your ex jealous. It won’t do that unless your ex has a good reason to check up on you and seek validation from you. Your ex will get jealous of your new life if your ex struggles to make any positive changes and fails miserably.

That’s when your personal improvements will stand out and make your ex want them for himself/herself. They’ll make your ex wonder why you were able to improve after getting rejected while he or she did not.

Your ex had better conditions for instant gratification whereas you had the power of rejection and long-term improvement.

So keep in mind that your changes and improvements could make your ex envious (when things go south on your ex’s end). They could shock your ex and tell your ex that you’re better off because of the breakup.

This could trigger your ex’s insecurities and make your ex want to know what motivated you to evolve. Did you evolve because your ex was holding you back? Such thoughts could pop into your ex’s mind when your ex gets through the initial stages of a breakup and realizes life isn’t all rainbows and sunshine.

To make your ex envious, work on:

• your patience, listening, and communication
• self-awareness
• gratitude
• respect and self-respect
• mental and physical health
• (emotional) maturity
• bad habits, traits, and behaviors
• hobbies, ambitions, and purpose
• work and finances
• friends and social life
• your overall contribution to society

As a person, you must always be open to change and improvement. Don’t work on yourself only when something goes wrong and hurts you. When it goes wrong, it’s often too late to fix it. You can’t artificially increase your ex’s interest in you.

He or she must first become receptive to you.

Remember that the person you’ve directly or indirectly hurt has put up a wall and won’t get jealous and let you close until something changes his or her thinking. That something could be anything painful and/or powerful enough to cause reflection and a desire to seek happiness elsewhere.

Don’t expect your ex to get jealous if you remain as you are and don’t wait for your ex to get in trouble. Any attempts to make your ex jealous prematurely will likely backfire and make you look deceitful.

So if you want to make your ex jealous, know that you must first improve yourself and give your ex something to be jealous about. You must grow as a person and let your ex get jealous by checking up on you and seeing that you’re not trying to make him or her jealous.

When your ex finds something to be jealous/envious of, your ex could reach out and see if he or she is still important to you and capable of controlling your emotions and time. A feeling of control would ease his or her jealousy and the need to keep you around.

Change your appearance

Emotional attraction is important, but so are looks. They’re an important part of your ex’s (physical) attraction to you. If your ex doesn’t find you attractive, your ex won’t feel jealous either.

Your ex will think your new life isn’t much or any different from when he or she left you and that he or she isn’t missing out on anything.

So use the breakup as an opportunity to improve your physical appearance. Exercise regularly, get enough sleep, change your clothing style and hairstyle, apply makeup, quit drinking/doing drugs, get rid of stressors, and smile a lot.

Your appearance (which is how you take care of yourself and present yourself) is the first thing your ex will notice when he or she decides to check up on you.

If you make a bad impression (because you’ve let yourself go or failed to show any physical improvements), your ex could think you haven’t changed any habits and as a result, find you unattractive.

Make sure to work on your physique and the way you want people to perceive you. Do it for yourself as a form of self-care.

Date someone else

Talking to others and dating them could make your ex jealous, provided your ex has a difficult time creating a fulfilling life or is still attached to you (usually happens right after the breakup).

Either thing could make your ex feel insecure (jealous). But an unfulfilling life has a higher chance of making your ex jealous because it can affect your ex’s self-esteem and trigger longings for a safer and happier life.

When your ex sees you’re dating and having a good time, your ex could want to be happy too. He or she could doubt his or her ability to make you happy and wonder if he or she was the problem.

Such thoughts could cause your ex to become obsessed with you and crave your validation.

Your ex could also only be jealous but not have any feelings. That would imply that your ex is competing with you and trying to boost his or her ego.

Post your new life on social media

The best way to make your ex jealous is to post your improvements, changes, and happiness online. The more you post and the happier you appear, the bigger the chance that your ex will get jealous.

If your ex gets jealous (or annoyed), your ex will likely retaliate. He or she will block you out of his or her life and by doing so, keep you out of his or her head. Your ex will think you’re showing off too much and that you’re not worth staying online friends with.

I suggest that you minimize how much you post and what kind of things you post. Instead of posting selfies with attractive people and hoping that your ex gets insecure and responds positively to it, post things or people that don’t make your ex feel replaced.

Publish pictures of interesting places, trips with friends, your achievements and hobbies, and things that have been keeping you busy since the breakup. Your ex will respect you and think about you more if you don’t flood his or her social platforms with pictures of your new dating interests.

It’s okay to share pictures of the people you spend time with, but do so in moderation. Don’t overdo it if you’re trying to get back with your ex. Remember that your ex lost feelings and that your ex needs to first fail at finding happiness before he or she becomes extremely envious or jealous.

Are you still wondering how to make your ex jealous with basic psychology? Will you give any of these tips a try? Let us know in the comments below—and we’ll get back to you shortly.

However, if you’d like to talk to us in detail about ways to make your ex jealous, consider subscribing to 1-on-1 coaching. You can do that on our coaching page.

Zan

My name is Zan and I’m the founder of Magnet of Success. I enjoy writing realistic relationship and breakup articles and helping readers heal and grow. With more than 5 years of experience in the self-improvement, relationship, and breakup sphere, my goal is to provide advice that fosters positivity and success and avoids preventable mistakes and pain. Buy me a coffee, learn more about me, or get in touch today.