Best Ways To Get Over Someone

It’s a common misconception to believe that the best way to get over someone you love or feel attached to is to get under someone else. Sleeping with a new person while you still have feelings for the previous person will likely make you rebound and miss your crush or ex even more. It will make you see the new person as inferior and your ex as superior, unique, and the best.

The difference in quality and attraction between the two people will increase your pain and obsession with your ex and delay your healing process by months or longer, depending on how badly you want the new person to save you from anxiety or depression.

If you want to get over someone, you have to do things that help you detach and feel powerful. Such things don’t involve the person who rejected you and broke your heart. They involve your healthy decisions that improve your self-esteem and post-rejection life.

Simply put, to get over a person who doesn’t want you, you have to get yourself back and restore your emotional well-being. You can do this by learning what helps you and what makes things harder.

Post-rejection communication obviously makes things harder. It forces you to think about your ex or crush and keeps you hungry for his or her love and attention. What makes things easier is no contact. By ceasing all unnecessary communication with the person you love, you can slowly but surely get used to living without this person and create a fulfilling, independent life for yourself.

You can detox from your ex and stop needing your ex’s attention and validation.

So make sure to do your research. Find out what you and your ex need from each other to process the separation and live your best lives. It’s important to understand that getting rid of romantic feelings requires appropriate actions. It requires the rejected person to ignore his or her emotions and follow rational advice.

This is, of course, hard to do because emotions fly all over the place after the breakup. Emotions instruct you to make impulsive decisions and try to end pain as quickly as possible. Despite the constant reminder of not being good enough and the temptation to communicate (and ruin your progress), you must understand how rejections work and embrace rationality.

Rationality will help you get over the rejection and slowly open your heart up to other things and people.

Hence, one of the best ways to get over someone is to think rationally. You may not like or agree with the rational advice you read or hear (especially at first), but eventually (if you listen to it long enough), you’ll see that it’s the best for your recovery. It may not be what your ex wants, but your ex doesn’t feel how you feel and get a say in your life anymore.

He or she decided to reject and abandon you and live life on his or her terms.

You must do the same. Instead of worrying about your ex’s wants and needs, put yourself first and worry about getting over your ex. Focus on the things that make you feel healthy, loved, needed, and important. They’ll give your life meaning, boost your broken self-esteem, and show you that your ex isn’t as important as your separation anxiety, fear, and insecurities make you think that he or she is.

If you handle the rejection the right way, your ex will slowly lose importance in your eyes and become a part of your past. It will take time, but your proof of doing things right will be the feeling of happiness and emotional freedom when you finally let go of the person you love.

There are right and wrong ways to get over someone. The right ways include leaving your ex alone and focusing on yourself whereas the wrong ways include talking to your ex and relying on your ex for healing. If you put your ex in charge of your health and happiness, you’ll soon learn the hard way that your ex can’t and doesn’t want to help you with your problems and that your ex’s presence and behavior make things worse.

As someone who was rejected, you need to understand that your ex isn’t waiting for you to win his or her heart and that you won’t lose anything by letting go. On the contrary, you’ll only gain things because you’ll restore your happiness and stop depending on your ex for self-love.

I encourage you to start getting over the person you love right away. Do this by learning the importance of letting go of someone who doesn’t love you back and the methods for doing so. When you’re aware of the benefits of letting go and the best ways to detach, you’ll feel more motivated to leave the person in question behind and fall back in love with yourself.

In this post, we talk about the best ways to get over someone you love. Thanks for reading.

The best ways to get over someone

One of the best ways to get over someone is to understand that this person may not come back and want to be with you. Acceptance is critical because it lets you stop holding on to hope and encourages you to be contented without the leaver. The quicker you accept the fact that all exes don’t come back and that everyone doesn’t get the ending they want, the quicker you’ll get out of denial and be okay on your own.

If you only read articles or watch videos that talk about relationships and reconciliations in an overly optimistic manner, you’ll brainwash yourself into thinking that you can rationalize with this person and convince him or her to be with you. You’ll think that you don’t need to get over a person who doesn’t want to be with you because you can impress him or her and persuade him or her to be with you.

This kind of thinking will swamp your brain with unrealistic information and false hope and slow down your detachment process.

So accept the possibility that the person in question doesn’t want to be with you and that he or she may not come back. Accepting the end of the relationship and understanding your powerlessness is crucial for your recovery because it will discourage you from fighting for a relationship that no longer exists (or never was).

Most dumpees struggle with this. They had a say in the relationship when they were with their ex, so they think they can talk some sense into their ex after the relationship if they’re just honest and apologetic. Soon, however, they learn that their ex is completely unreceptive to their reasoning and desperation and that they feel worse than they did before they reached out and pleaded with their ex.

Therefore, get the idea that you might be able to change your ex’s mind if you try hard enough out of your head. Give up on talking to your ex and looking for ways to show your changes, improvements, and overall worth. Your ex already knows your personality and what you have to offer. Even if you didn’t date or dated only for a little while, your ex or the person you wanted to date is convinced that you’re not someone he or she wants to settle down with.

You shouldn’t try to convince your ex otherwise. Since your ex has formed an opinion of you and may even have found someone new to date, you should respect your ex’s decisions and feelings and do your best to accept the breakup/rejection and give up on the relationship.

Once you’ve decided to get over a person who doesn’t love you back, you’re ready to move on to the practical strategies for getting over a person. You’re ready to implement rules that will ensure the quickest and most efficient recovery. Those rules are called the rules of no contact. We talk about them all the time on this blog, but in a nutshell, they prohibit all communication and suggest leaving the dumper alone.

No contact is the only self-imposed rule that will allow you to distance yourself from your ex physically and emotionally and let you forget about your ex. Make sure to follow all its rules (unfollow, delete, or block your ex if necessary). They’ll help you detach from your ex and teach you to rely on yourself for healing and growth.

Getting over someone you love will take time. Don’t expect to heal after just a few weeks. If you have strong feelings for this person, it will take many months to fully process rejection, love yourself, and appreciate your life.

You may be able to speed up the detachment process by focusing on parts of your life that make you happy and parts that need improving.

By focusing on the things that make you happy, you’ll distract yourself from post-breakup blues and replace your ex. And by focusing on parts that need improving, you’ll improve your flaws and distance yourself from your mistakes and shortcomings. You’ll understand that you’re different (more mature) from how you were when you got abandoned, and as a result, avoid blaming yourself and thinking poorly of yourself.

You have a lot of work to do. Take the rejection seriously (but not to heart) and reflect on your life. If you invest in yourself and improve from the ordeal, you’ll soon stop caring about your ex’s thoughts and feelings and prioritize your health and well-being. You’ll see that your ex’s opinion of you doesn’t matter and that you’ll eventually find more and better people to date.

I know it’s hard to imagine not getting affected by your ex’s rejection and negative perception of you, but mark my words that this day will come. One day, you’ll get over your ex and love yourself more thanks to the lessons your ex has forced on you by leaving you.

All the best ways to get over someone who doesn’t want you include self-love. If they boost your self-esteem and reduce your attachment to your ex, they’re the right things to do.

That’s why exercising is one of the best ways to get over someone. Exercising not only releases happy hormones but also lets you work toward a pre-determined goal. As long as you know what you’re working toward, you’re successful because you have a purpose. Maybe a revenge body or an attractive physique isn’t your top priority, but it’s enough to get you off your butt and move forward with your life.

If you’re moving forward, you have goals and ambitions outside of the relationship with your ex.

So set some healthy goals and get plenty of daily exercise. You’ll be healthier, feel relaxed from the hormones exercising releases, and have a short or long-term purpose. Make sure to also pick up some new hobbies and avoid going to places where you might run into your ex. Avoiding places your ex frequents doesn’t make you weak and give your ex power over you.

It makes you look strong for resisting the temptation to make your ex notice you and see your improvements.

You’ve got to understand that your ex won’t like you more if he or she sees you in public. You won’t feel any better either. For a brief moment, you’ll feel hopeful, but when hope runs out, you’ll analyze your ex’s actions and inactions and feel worse because of it.

If you work with your ex, it might also be a good idea to change jobs. It’s a hassle to do that if you enjoy your work, but seeing your ex every day and watching your ex talk to anyone but you will drive you crazy. It will make you anxious and insecure.

You can avoid unnecessary suffering simply by distancing yourself from your ex physically and throwing away reminders of your ex. This includes physical and digital photos, gifts, and your ex’s phone number. Don’t hold on to memories of your ex in case your ex comes back. If your ex comes back, you’ll start anew and show you were focusing on yourself rather than the life your ex discarded.

You’ll force your ex to take you seriously.

So if you want to know the best ways to get over someone, start by going no contact and throwing away everything that reminds you of your ex. It doesn’t mean you won’t occasionally have moments of weakness and miss your ex. All it means is that you’ll do what you need to do and put yourself on the path to recovery.

When it comes to romantic rejections, there is no such thing as a quick recovery. But there are bad, good, and the best ways to detox and get your happy life back.

They include focusing entirely on yourself and your loved ones and getting the help that you need. If you need to talk to friends and family about how you feel, talk to them. If you need a mental health expert to understand your feelings and your ex’s decisions and actions better, sign up for a session or two.

Just don’t sit at home alone and feel sorry for yourself. Self-pity could make you fall into depression and complicate your recovery.

Also, avoid taking revenge. You may not be with your ex, but that doesn’t mean your ex shouldn’t be happy (with someone else). As painful as the thought of your ex moving on and dating someone else is, remember that your goal as a dumpee is to be better than your ex and the person you were yesterday.

It’s more important to grow as a partner than it is to end up in jail or get a restraining order against you.

Having said that, here are the best ways to get over someone.

You can’t skip/fast-forward the healing process

There are no quick ways to get over someone. You, like any dumpee, will have to process the breakup naturally and get your crush or ex out of your system by staying busy, living with purpose, rebuilding your self-esteem, and improving yourself.

It will take time, but that’s okay. The positive thing about getting over someone is that the longer it takes to heal, the more opportunities you will have to grow. If you take the rejection seriously and put in the hard work, you’ll make more improvements in a few months than you’d otherwise make in years.

Yes, it sucks to feel rejected and abandoned. Nothing feels worse than seeing the person you love not feel the same way about you. It hurts like hell because you have one-sided feelings and romantic expectations. It will take some time to let go of them and find better things or people to prioritize.

You’ll have to learn to love yourself from the ground up and convince yourself that the relationship with this person would have been difficult. You don’t have to lie to yourself, but it will help a lot if you focus on his or her bad points and remember that things happened exactly how they were supposed to.

The relationship wasn’t supposed to be. Whether it’s because you were incompatible, because you made irreversible mistakes, or because your ex took you for granted and stopped seeing your value, the breakup happened for a reason. Something went wrong and triggered rejection/separation.

You don’t have a choice but to let go of the relationship. If you want the best for yourself, you must do what’s best for you and concentrate on getting over the breakup. When you’re over it, you’ll see that all this pain and worrying wasn’t worth your time and health.

What do you think are the best ways to get over someone? What’s worked for you or someone you know? Drop a comment in the comments box below.

And if you want our help with getting over someone who doesn’t want you, get in touch by subscribing to 1-on-1 coaching.

Zan

My name is Zan and I’m the founder of Magnet of Success. I enjoy writing realistic relationship and breakup articles and helping readers heal and grow. With more than 5 years of experience in the self-improvement, relationship, and breakup sphere, my goal is to provide advice that fosters positivity and success and avoids preventable mistakes and pain. Buy me a coffee, learn more about me, or get in touch today.