8 Signs Your Ex Is Missing You Without You Even Knowing

If your ex left you and you’re missing your ex so much you feel sick, you probably want to know if your ex is missing you. You want to know that you’re not the only one in pain, thinking about a former partner 24/7. You want your ex also to spend a big chunk of his or her days ruminating about the past and wondering how and what you’re doing.

Rest assured that it’s normal to have these thoughts. Your ex not only hurt your feelings and confidence in yourself and your single life but also destroyed your relationship goals, purpose, and identity. These things slowed down your stream of happy hormones and limited your ability to stop thinking and caring about your ex.

It will take some time to detach and stop missing your ex, so in the meantime, you probably want to know if your ex is missing you.

If and how much your ex is missing you depends on how close a relationship you had and why or how that relationship ended. If you had a nasty breakup and called each other the worst insults you could think of, nostalgia probably won’t be a big part of your ex’s post-breakup experience. It can’t be because your ex feels angry and victimized and wants you to

Your dumper ex will think about you and miss you the most if you handled the breakup maturely and refused to act needy, demanding, or insulting. Self-focus, confidence, and mystery will make your ex wonder if you’re happy and why that might be. If your ex is unhappy, he or she might even reach out and try to lean on you for support and recognition.

That would indicate that your ex needs you to deal with his or her problems and feel better.

Many dumpers miss their ex, but keep in mind that they usually don’t miss them in the way dumpees want them to. They merely feel curious and miss the non-romantic (friendship) aspect of the relationship. They miss their ex’s presence or convenience rather than romance.

Some dumpers want relationship benefits without commitment. That means they want friendship, sex, validation, support, and other perks they received from their ex in return for their commitment and investment. They want to keep receiving these benefits even though they haven’t earned them. We could say they miss their ex or rather the things their ex did for them during the relationship.

They miss what they had and how they felt when life was easier or different.

If you’re okay with being missed as a friend rather than a partner, you’re probably over or almost over your ex. You accept the possibility that your ex may not have feelings for you and that your ex just wants to be on friendly terms with you. You’ve made enough emotional progress to not worry about being replaced or forgotten.

But if you still love your ex and want your ex to recognize your romantic worth, then you probably want your ex to miss you romantically and take you back. You want your ex to stop enjoying his or her life without you and miss you as much as you miss him or her.

The only reason you want your ex to feel nostalgic about the relationship is so your ex can come running back, admit to making a huge mistake, validate you, and alleviate your separation anxiety. You basically want to know your ex is struggling without you and that you’re still an important part of your ex’s life.

Obviously, you’d know if your ex missed you romantically. You’d know your ex still loves you because your ex would express remorse, feelings, and pain. Your ex’s emotions and actions would tell you that he or she regrets leaving and wants you back to feel desired and safe.

If you don’t get any regret and love from your ex, all that leaves you with is the possibility that your ex misses you in a non-romantic manner.

And that’s what we’re going to talk about in this article. Today we talk about the 8 signs your ex is missing you.

1)Your ex keeps reaching out and talking about unimportant matters

Frequent reach-outs are one of the biggest signs that your ex is missing you or at least the things you provided to him or her throughout the course of the relationship. Initiations prove that your ex has processed the most difficult emotions triggered by the breakup and that your ex is thinking about you more than he or she is willing to admit.

Even if your ex doesn’t verbally express nostalgic thoughts and feelings, your ex’s actions prove that he or she has them. They show that your ex wants or needs you in his or her life at least to some degree.

Your ex wouldn’t be reaching out and talking about random things if he or she didn’t miss you. Your ex would be staying away from you (like most dumpers) and appear happy, relieved, and busy. The breakup would empower your ex and let your ex enjoy his or her life without you.

So if your ex keeps reaching out and expressing the desire to talk to you about unimportant things, bear in mind that your ex most likely misses you, enjoys your company, and wants to be your friend. Your ex doesn’t know that reaching out gives you hope and makes it harder for you to detach and get your happy self back.

Your ex just wants what he or she wants – company. Talking to you helps your ex hold on to you and feel fulfilled as a friend. Consequently, it prevents you from moving on and finding someone who can give you what you deserve.

If your ex were to reach out to talk about important stuff such as kids, work, or something equally important, that would be a different story. It’d show that your ex has unfinished business with you rather than feelings of nostalgia. But since your ex reaches out to talk about random things, it’s clear that your ex wants rather than needs to talk to you.

2)Your ex keeps prolonging the conversations

Long, prolonged conversations also indicate nostalgia. Sometimes they also show curiosity and guilt, but most of the time, they suggest that your ex enjoys speaking with you and can’t get enough. When an ex deliberately avoids ending the conversation, it shows that your ex harbors no resentment and likes you as a person. Your ex enjoys catching up and may even want you in his or her life as a friend.

What your ex wants is hard to say as some dumpers feel excited to talk only the first time. They feel relieved to see that their ex has let go of the relationship and is open to non-romantic conversations.

When exes talk for a long time, they normally haven’t talked in a while and have a lot to say to each other, so they talk for hours and hours. This doesn’t indicate regret (at least not for dumpers), but that they’re nostalgic and willing to converse for a bit.

If they stay in touch after the first conversation, they usually want to remain in touch and/or be friends.

3)Your ex talks about the good times

When your ex brings up memories from the past, your ex makes it crystal clear that he or she misses you and the fun times he or she associates with you. Your ex may not regret breaking up, but your ex does miss having thought-provoking and emotionally fulfilling conversations with you.

Whether it’s because your ex lacks excitement or because your ex is lonely, your ex remembers you and wants to feel emotionally satisfied by exchanging words with you. That’s why your ex chooses to relive the good moments with you and hopes that you miss him or her as much as he or she misses you.

By talking about the good times, your ex can indulge in nostalgia and continue to focus on the present. A little bit of nostalgia indicates that your ex misses your personality whereas a lot of nostalgia indicates regret. As a reminder, try not to mistake your ex’s wish to talk about the good times for a wish to get back together. To want you back, your ex would have to despise the present and need you back to be happy.

4)Your ex asks mutual friends for updates on you

Another good sign that your ex misses you is when your ex brings you up to his or her family and friends. Willingly talking about you may show that your ex misses having a reliable person to talk to and bond with. This is especially true if you had a good connection with your ex and ended the relationship on good terms.

When an ex talks about you to his or her loved ones, your ex wonders how you’ve been and what your life’s been like.

Again, make sure not to mistake curiosity for nostalgia. If your ex misses you, your ex won’t just ask his or her mutual friends about you. Your ex will tell them that he or she craves your company and hopes to be friends or at least on talking terms one day.

5)Your ex likes old social media posts

If your ex likes your old social media posts, your ex probably wants you to know that he or she likes you, misses you, and wants to be friends. Liking posts from the past suggests that your ex may be reminiscing and wanting to have a deep conversation with you.

Your ex’s exact intentions are hard to decipher because dumpers like their ex’s posts for different reasons. Despite that, it’s obvious that your ex scrolls through old pictures and posts to remember how he or she felt back then. To express that he or she looks back on the past with fondness, your ex likes your old posts and hopes that you understand his or her sentimentality.

Mind you, your ex may not want a response from you. Your ex may just be going through your old posts for his or her own reasons or to subtly show you that he or she misses you. If your ex wants friendship or a relationship, your ex will let you know. You don’t have to reach out and ask for them.

6)Your ex doesn’t want to give you space to heal

When an ex keeps reaching out and refusing to give you space, you have one of the best signs that your ex misses you and wants to keep you around for comfort. Your ex is accustomed to having you in his or her life and can’t imagine drifting apart and not spending any time together.

The problem though is that you probably still have feelings for your ex and don’t want your ex in your life just as a friend. You want a romantic relationship or no relationship at all.

So even if your ex misses you and insists on being friends, remember that your ex is of no use to you as a friend. Your ex has to want you back romantically otherwise he or she will cause more harm than good. Your ex will keep hurting you and making you want his or her love and reassurance.

7)Your ex wants your help with his or her problems

This sign could indicate that your ex considers you his or her go-to person for dealing with problems and that your ex misses having a good friend – someone to talk to when difficulties arise. Your ex hasn’t been able to find someone to replace you, so your ex confides in you and continues to act like your partner.

Your ex, of course, only acts that way. He or she has no intention of getting back with you and helping you feel loved and needed.

So if your ex only wants help when he or she has problems or unmet needs, consider it a sign that your ex misses your emotional support and wants a relationship based on convenience and privilege. Your ex wants to lean on you when life gets hard and wants space when he or she is doing fine.

8)Your ex says he/she misses you

Obviously, nothing makes it clearer that your ex misses you than your ex telling you he or she misses you. Your ex telling you how he or she feels is a clear sign that your ex feels nostalgic and that your ex may be having a hard time forgetting about you.

If you want, you can tell your ex you miss him or her back. Just don’t get hope from it and settle for friendship. Friendship with your ex will keep you hooked on your ex and delay your recovery for weeks or months, depending on how close you get to your ex. The closer you get, the longer you can expect your ex to linger on your mind and torment you emotionally.

All the signs mentioned in this article are for you to better understand your ex, not to reach out to your ex and make your ex fall back in love. You won’t make your ex fall back in love with you by force. You’ll just lose your ex’s remaining curiosity and respect and push your ex further away.

So whatever you do, don’t act on any of the signs your ex is missing you. Even if you’re certain that your ex misses you, don’t act on impulse and destroy your emotional progress. Instead, tell yourself that your ex needs to reach out first and put in the necessary work.

You can be friends with your ex later if you want to, but only after you’ve processed the separation and want friendship as much as your ex.

Can you think of any other signs that your ex may be missing you? Post them in the comments below.

And if you’re looking for explanations, closure, or methods to reconnect with your dumper ex, subscribe to personal coaching. We provide breakup services to dumpees as well as dumpers.

Zan

My name is Zan and I’m the founder of Magnet of Success. I enjoy writing realistic relationship and breakup articles and helping readers heal and grow. With more than 5 years of experience in the self-improvement, relationship, and breakup sphere, my goal is to provide advice that fosters positivity and success and avoids preventable mistakes and pain. Buy me a coffee, learn more about me, or get in touch today.