The psychology of no contact on male dumper says that dumpers (male or female) need lots of time to themselves to think about the breakup. They’re convinced that breaking up was the right thing to do, so they need to enjoy their new life for a while, get into trouble, and be proven wrong.
They basically need to suffer because anxiety, depression, and the realization that they can’t find what they’re looking for force them to see their ex’s worth and enable them to redevelop feelings for their ex.
The more they covet their ex’s happiness, the easier they forget about the problems they had with their ex and feel something for their ex again.
The idea behind no contact isn’t to pretend you’re happily dating other people and play with your ex’s feelings. It’s to preserve your worth by refusing to chase after your ex and give your ex enough time to fail in life. When he finally fails and gets hurt is when he’ll be forced to start reflecting on life choices, remember his exes, and become curious about them.
And that’s when he’ll realize they’re doing better than him and want to be a part of their life again. You see, we can pretend that dumpers want their recent dumpee back simply because their ex was a good person, but sadly, that’s not how the psychology of no contact works on a male dumper.
Being a good person is important, of course, but dumpers need a stronger reason to miss their exes. And that reason is, unfortunately, almost always incentivized by something bad. Something that triggers their fears and anxiety, makes them compare their new life to life before, and urges them to fix their failures or unhappiness with the help of their ex.
Without some kind of failure, the dumpee can be the nicest, most caring person in the world but she still won’t attract his ex. She won’t be able to because her ex won’t see her worth (respect her much) and feel attracted to her.
Depending on the things his dumpee does, he’s much more likely to feel disappointed, annoyed, smothered, repulsed, and guilt-tripped.
So if you aren’t following a strict regimen of no contact yet, start following it now. No contact is your best method for attracting your ex back because you’ll be letting your ex process the breakup naturally and give your ex a chance to do what he’s been wanting to do.
No contact is incredibly difficult at first because it takes all your strength not to reach out and beg. But because it’s so difficult, it’s also why it can have a positive effect on your dumper. It can show him you’re strong enough not to run after him even though he’s caused you overwhelming separation anxiety and hurt you more than anyone before.
Of course, your ex doesn’t know how you feel after the breakup if you don’t tell him or show him, but he does know what you were like in the relationship. If you were needy and demanding, he remembers that same old image of you and is going to cling to it for dear life. He’ll let go of it only if you do a complete 180 (stay in no contact) and show him you can handle your life and move on vigorously and confidently.
How you portray yourself is very important after the breakup as your ex’s image of you is already worse than it should be. You can’t afford to worsen it by befriending your ex and/or staying in touch. If you stay in touch (especially by initiating conversations), you’ll have a very difficult time showing you’ve changed.
You’ll probably show you’re even more dependent on your ex than before and make it even harder for him to respect you.
In this post, we’ll talk about the psychology of no contact on the male dumper. We’ll discuss how no contact affects the dumper and what you should do to increase your chances of hearing from him and getting back together. Just keep in mind that the psychology of no contact applies to female dumpers as well. When it comes to breakups, both males and females ought to follow the same breakup plan.
Psychology of no contact on a male dumper
When your ex breaks up with you, your ex gets tired of being in a relationship with you and is in total control of the breakup. All he wants to do is distance himself from you so he can live life freely. And that’s what your ex must do. Your ex must get space because he has an overwhelming craving for freedom and independence. He’d been meaning to break up with you for a very long time but couldn’t because he lacked the courage and/or still had some hope for the relationship.
Now that your ex finally managed to break it off with you, though, your ex doesn’t feel shocked and hurt like you do. On the contrary, he feels relieved and elated and wants to enjoy his newfound freedom. If you don’t let your ex enjoy his alone time, you shouldn’t expect him to respect you either.
You can expect him to feel trapped and show you his worst side. The reason for that is that dumpers are very sensitive after the breakup. They think they have the right to be happy and that their ex has to respect their wishes.
If you don’t want your ex to hurt you more than he already has, therefore, you have to understand that you and your ex have different needs. Your ex feels the need to distance himself from you and do what makes him happy whereas you wish to redevelop your self-esteem and regain your happiness.
You’re both going through different stages of a breakup. And as long as you both want different things in life, you’re going to expect different things from each other and emotionally exhaust each other.
So if you’re trying to learn how the psychology of no contact works on a male dumper, know that no contact is not just about the dumper. No contact works for you too as it helps you get out of denial and encourages you to regain strength and power. And that’s what could one day attract your ex when life gives him lemons.
The table below shows the stages you and your ex are going through. For the reconciliation to be healthy, keep in mind that you must both get to the last stage. If your ex comes back when you’re still longing for him, you could overwhelm your ex and scare him off.
| Stages of no contact for the dumpee | Stages of no contact for the dumper | |
| 1. | Denial | Relief |
| 2. | Depression | Elation |
| 3. | Anger | Nostalgia and comparisons |
| 4. | Acceptance | Neutrality |
| 5. | Recovery | Regret and sadness |
I want you to pay close attention to this table. If you look carefully, you’ll see that you and your ex are starting on the opposite ends. While you’re in denial, wondering why the breakup occurred, your ex feels relieved that he’s single or with someone else and is enjoying himself.
This is completely normal and to be expected. Dumpers can’t wait to get out of relationships because they’d been wanting to spread their wings and fly for a very long time. They’d thought relationship-damaging thoughts and gradually succumbed to the weight of their negative thinking.
The only thing that can change their negative thinking and the unhealthy emotions they created with it is the reaping of their harvest. What I mean by that is that they can become sad and regretful and run back to their ex for comfort and familiarity if they discern that they’re not as happy as they used to be when they were with their ex.
The picture below will explain the psychology of no contact on a male dumper, female dumper, and non-binary dumper.
I know that no contact seems like a very passive approach (and it probably is), but you don’t have a choice but to wait for something bad to happen to your ex. That’s the only way your ex will respect you, envy your strength, lower his pride and guard, and talk to you.
I can’t promise that he’ll want to get back together with you, but if he gets hurt a lot, there’s a chance that he’ll at least want your emotional support and validation (not saying that’s a good thing). Your job as a dumpee is to keep moving on with your life and show you’ve got what it takes to deal with the post-breakup blues.
Don’t make no contact about your ex
Although you want your ex to see you’re moving forward and discover your worth, don’t post happy posts with other guys on social media with the intent to make your ex jealous. Inciting jealousy is not going to happen because if your ex has decent self-esteem, it’s going to annoy him and make him lose even more respect for you.
So forget about proving how well you’re doing by hitting below the belt (attacking your ex’s self-worth). Dumpers don’t get jealous the way dumpees and people in relationships do. They don’t have expectations and are detached, which is why you’ll have a much better chance of reattracting him by posting your achievements in a non-bragging manner.
By appearing genuinely happy, you won’t instantly trigger his biggest fears, but you will let him know that you’re focusing on yourself again and that you don’t mind him doing the same. That will slowly restore the power balance.
However, if you don’t have your ex on social media, then you don’t have to worry about using social media “to your advantage.” Social media won’t be of much use to you anyway because you won’t be able to impress your ex when he has guards up and is incapable of being impressed.
The only thing that will be able to impress your ex after the breakup is the power of silence itself.
Some dumpees think they need to fight for their ex to win their ex back, but a fight is not something their ex wants. Their ex wants to pull away and disassociate from the person who doesn’t make him happy anymore. It shouldn’t come as a surprise that the dumper doesn’t fancy the dumpee after the breakup.
But if it does, I’m sorry to burst your bubble. There’s no nicer way to say that your ex fell out of love because he associated negative emotions with you. He grew resentful or detached (possibly both), which implies that the only person who can change your ex’s perception of you is none other than your ex himself.
I know that you want to control the situation very badly, but your ex doesn’t want you to influence his ways of thinking anymore. He’s made up his mind about you which means he’s going to stick to his word until he doesn’t have a choice but to go back on it.
And as we’ve discussed, he’ll go back on it when his brain tells him his happiness depends on it.
Male dumper psychology revolves around many factors.
But the most significant ones are:
- Your happiness and self-respect. Your ex needs to respect you before he can develop feelings for you. And he can’t respect you and desire you if he sees you’re desperate for him.
- Your ex’s misfortunes and unhappiness. The more stress and anxiety that enters your ex’s system, the higher the chance that he’ll reflect and discern your worth.
- Your ex’s mentality and ways of handling things. This relates to the previous point, but we should mention it separately because not all dumpers handle predicaments the same way. Some drown their pain in alcohol, some internalize pain, and some look for help. It depends on each person’s attachment style, coping mechanism, self-esteem, and many others things. The point is that some dumpers have a higher chance of coming back than others.
- The quality of your relationship with your ex and his relationships afterward. If your relationship was healthy, your ex could compare his happiness to the relationship/s after you and discern that he was the happiest when he was with you. This realization could then make him nostalgic and propel him toward you.
No contact should be about you. It’s the most painless and quickest way to detach from your ex and get your life back in order. So put your faith in it and push through the anxiety stage of no contact. You’ll see that things get much, much easier with time and perseverance. That’s because your brain will adapt, become more immune to emotional setbacks, and detox.
How does no contact affect the dumper?
The psychology of no contact on male dumper works like this. The longer you leave the dumper alone, the more space and time you give him to feel relieved. And when he eventually stops feeling relieved, he also stops feeling smothered by the negative image he’d created of you and becomes ready to wonder about you, miss you, and get hurt.
The truth is that after the breakup, your ex can’t get hurt. He feels in complete control of the breakup and is certain that breaking up was the right thing to do. He may experience some doubts here and there, but negative emotions and perceptions of you make sure he doesn’t get back with you no matter what.
As time goes on, though, no contact starts lowering his defenses. It slowly erases his most painful emotions (not perceptions) and puts him in the neutral stage of a breakup. During that stage, your ex doesn’t want you back yet. He’s merely back to his usual self, which means that he becomes susceptible to pain just like any human being.
All he needs from here onwards is to get hurt.
And he can get hurt if:
- he breaks up with someone and realizes he had certain unresolved issues
- someone breaks up with him and realizes he’s not as great as he’d thought
- he gets stressed, anxious, or depressed about something that is important to him and starts craving his ex again
The other day, someone commented and said that not every dumper has an anxious attachment style and leaves because he or she feels smothered. That is true, there are many types of breakups and dumpers if I’m allowed to say “types.”
But what is also true is that you can’t expect your ex to want you back for no (emotional) reason. If your ex comes back out of boredom or even jealousy (that’s an emotional reason), chances are that he won’t learn to value you and stay with you.
He’ll likely stay only for as long as he’s jealous or bored.
Your ex needs to undergo an experience that triggers self-reflection. And like it or not, self-reflection demands a strong emotional incentive and time. Just how it took your ex a lot of thinking to break up with you, it will also take him lots of thinking to return.
The only difference is that his thinking will have to be healthy.
So don’t think that for your ex to return, your ex needs to have an anxious attachment style and be the biggest loser in town. That could certainly contribute to his loss of self-esteem and enable him to reflect as people with low self-esteem tend to reflect more than those with normal self-esteem, but, fortunately, this isn’t required for the dumper to return.
The dumper just needs to get hurt and realize that he’s abandoned a person he had taken for granted.
In simple terms, no contact can work on a male dumper when the guy:
- is capable of reflecting (not everyone is)
- fails miserably in life (especially in ways that shatter his self-esteem because that makes him reflect)
- realizes his mistakes and acknowledges your strength
The psychology of no contact on a male dumper is quite easy to understand as most dumpees get the gist of it very quickly. The problem is that initially, most dumpees are so hurt that they don’t want to do the reasonable thing – which is to wait things out.
They want to do something about their breakup pain by contacting their ex and convincing their ex they can have a fulfilling relationship with him or her.
If your breakup is fresh, you’re likely in denial and struggle to follow the rules of no contact. You’d rather take your chances doing something than do nothing and risk losing “the love of your life.”
I get that. But you have to know that you won’t just risk pushing away by reaching out prematurely. You’ll also hurt yourself in the process because if your ex isn’t reaching out and talking to you, he most likely isn’t interested in you at this moment.
He’s still processing relief and other smothering breakup emotions.
So remember, it’s not difficult to understand the psychology behind no contact. Understanding is the easy part. Following it is much harder because your heart is telling you to take action.
Your goal in no contact is simple. You need to detach to the point where you see your ex for the person he is. When that happens, you’ll look and feel stronger and as a result, be much more attractive to your ex.
Did you learn anything new about the psychology of no contact on a male dumper? Is there anything about no contact you’re not sure about yet? Let us know in the comments below.
And also, Magnet of Success takes pride in 1-on-1 coaching. If you’d like to talk about your breakup with us, learn how you can get in touch with us by visiting our coaching page.
My name is Zan and I’m the founder of Magnet of Success. I enjoy writing realistic relationship and breakup articles and helping readers heal and grow. With more than 5 years of experience in the self-improvement, relationship, and breakup sphere, my goal is to provide advice that fosters positivity and success and avoids preventable mistakes and pain. Buy me a coffee, learn more about me, or get in touch today.
What about when your ex slowly detach for 2 months first. With I don’t know what I want etc. You gave space intermittently but also tried to plan time together but to no avail.
This then led to a breakup.
Does that suggest it has less liklihood of reconciliation as its not out the blue.
Also he contacted me 3 days afterwards saying he is struggling to come to terms with it.
Does that mean he is having doubts and not in relief. Or trying to comfort me. Or just had a weak moment.
I didn’t think I would hear that soon and given it wasn’t a heated moment I was shocked. It turned out he still wanted the breakuo and I’ve been on no contact for a week now.
I just don’t understand why such a quick reach out. Given pre breakup he actively avoided me for 6weeks
Call and texts blanked but every now and then I love you messages.
Very confusing.
Hi Zan! My boyfriend broke things off out of the blue two days ago, and had a lot of reasons about not being 100% sure I was “the one” and feeling like he needed to focus on things outside of the relationship. We “broke” up once before about 4 months ago but he came back and wanted another change. This time around, he told me he loved me the day he broke up with me, and says that he wants to be in my life still and be friends. This morning he texted me “hi, hope you have a great day :).” Do I go no contact or try to keep up a friendly relationship to see if he changes his mind? He seems confused and still has strong feelings for me. But I also know I don’t want to be with someone who isn’t sure about me. Is no contact the best option? thanks for you help!
Hi Debbie.
Your ex lost feelings for you. Every time he leaves, he detaches more and wants you less. So yes, go no contact and ask him not to reach out when he does.
He either needs to see your worth and come back or leave you alone.
Kind regards,
Zan
is it too much to say that this is one of your best articles ever? Or I say it in almost every article that I read from you, haha?
Yes, no contact was challenging because it took all my strength not to reach out.
And I’m finally showing him and everyone else that I can handle my life and move on vigorously and confidently. 🙂 And all these THANKS TO YOU 🤍
I don’t think that life will give him lemons, but that’s okay too
And when I see the table, I understand and see it visually. I know that I and my ex are starting on opposite ends.
And for two years, I was in the power of silence, and it was the best thing I could ever do.
And now see my ex for the person he is and feel stronger.
Forever grateful for your help Zan 🤍
Thanks a lot, Linda!
Your ex may not have suffered as much as he needed to, but that doesn’t mean life will always be kind to him. I don’t want to sound pessimistic, but everyone faces challenges eventually. It’s how prepared we are for them that counts.
Kind regards,
Zan
Zan.. Thank you! Do article on female Dumper
Hi lb.
The advice here applies to women as well. But I suppose I need to write a separate article.
Thanks for the suggestion!
Zan
A comment was made that no contact only works on males and it doesn’t work for females. That is not an accurate statement. It effects females the same
Believe I know from experience.
It’s been 2 years since my long term bf monkey branched from me upon developing grass is greener. He’s been reaching out intermittently every few months wanting to catch up and I have been cordial in that I just acknowledge his reach out and don’t continue communication. And I never reach out first. Went no contact immediately & consistently.
Now, after all this time we finally spoke on the phone when he called and I was completely shocked to hear of how horrible things have been for him…horrendous & serious health issues, job issues and he even wants to confide in me about how the woman he monkey branched to is making him miserable ( I did not indulge him). Although he had hurt me badly and ended things unnecessarily poorly and selfishly, I of course feel sad for what he is going through now especially the health issues. He wants to continue to keep talking to me & apologized for how he had treated me and went on to say he thinks the world of me, etc. I don’t want to let a person down when he is suffering so much, but then I remember how he treated me at a time when I was going through a very tough time myself. Should I be the better person and continue to talk to him or will this end up making me suffer in the long run. I’ve come so far. Any thoughts out there?
Hi MK.
You should be the better person, but you shouldn’t keep talking to him. Not after getting treated so badly and selfishly. I think it’s time to cut him off and focus on your own life. He should deal with his own mess. It sounds rude, I know, but that’s what he signed up for.
Kind regards,
Zan
Yes they do.
Anon,
This wasn’t your fault the first time or this time. This is what this guy does. You will see. Your life is going to be just fine. You are the type of man who builds things in life and sees beyond someone’s shortcomings. You only see potential and can overcome anything. While this intrepid quality serves you
well in life, it is the opposite with people. With people you have to be willing from the beginning to look at them realistically as they are, not for the potential you see. This guy used you for entertainment. In time, when you have acquired more success because you are a bold, driven person, you will learn he’s just another one of the single cell organisms out there, good luck to you!
“Time wounds all heels.”
Mae West
What keeps me from texting him back “Hi again? Happy New Year? Is that it?” Is that why? Why? Do i have to do all the work. To chase someone that’s obviously living a perfectly happy life without me. I do have the urge to text him hell even pick up the phone and call him but once again why? Hes the one who ghost dumped me. If he wants me back HE WILL TEXT/CALL me not the other way around. He KNOWS how i feel about him. He took me back the 2nd time around knowing I was ready for a real commitment a loving fulfilling long term relationship he was just playing with me those 2 months to see if he wanted that with me too and took the coward way out again leaving me high and dry thanksgiving eve. Then sends me a bread crumb text here and there since then. In fact before he wished me happy new year in December he texted that i would see him again and i replied back with ambivalent less enthused energy something like OK and left it at that and he STILL never fulfilled that promise only a paltry happy new year text where after weeks of silence and my implementing indefinite no contact i left him on read myself for 3 days and eventually replied back HNY with the same energy only for him to never respond to me himself and its been over a week its 1/8 right now. Its maddening that he does this to me. It shows me how he truly feels about me meaning im not that important of a person in his life to follow up with. He has a lot of friends and family and i know da*n well he doesn’t take days to respond to them or treat them the way he treated me and why? Why would he treat someone that gave him so much love unconditionally and took him back a 2nd time only to be ghost dumped again with no explanation. I do wish I could pick up the phone call him and curse him out for being a fraud, for hurting me once again, for playing games on me, but no just like Zan says I will lose my power, lose my self respect stooping to that level. Only my silence and the following weeks into months and maybe years, my disappearance will show him that this guy (me) wasn’t going to stick around and make him love me again. Its true DO NOT chases someone that doesn’t want to chase you and that’s exactly what im doing when it comes to him. He DID chase me when he took me back the 2nd time I was alluring, he told me then how much he liked how i had improved myself. He was jealous seeing how good I looked when I was out interacting and talking with other guys and because he knew i still has unrequited love for him he quite possibly took me back for 2 months maybe as a sick game to see if he could get me back and of course I did. I loved being in his arms i lover our intimate moments and then 2 months later thanksgiving eve and the week up to it he became distant and shady again and left me heartbroken in December working on myself again to go through a new round of break up stages as the dumpee. Well its January now and im better. Last year the 1st time he dumped me i was such a mess, i did everything wrong, my brain came up with all these excuses or ideas to contact him again (which Zan says in his blogs is a very bad idea and it was) and it got me now where. It wasn’t until I truly moved on with my life became emotionally healthy again the best version of myself once more for him to eventually bump into me late last summer and then he took me back 2 intense months went by of us being together only for him to get cold feet? Lie and was seeing someone else too? Idk all i know he is did it again to me and this time around. I have MAJORLY disappeared i have withdrew from social circles i use to join and he would be a part of and made myself a missing fixture in these scenarios. I think that’s why I have been getting the occasional bread crumb text, curiosity as to what im doing. Thats not enough for me to elicit a hey i miss you response. YOU (he) dumped me again YOU (he) need to do the work if you want me back. There is nothing more I have to do on my end I’ve already done it. He knows where Im at he knows where I live. I’m All The Wiser
Sounds so much like my story. You’ve got this.
This only works on male dumpers. Female dumpers never look back.
It works on female dumpers too, Hendrik.
Best regards,
Zan
Hi Zan. I am a bit puzzled. Maybe I’m reading too many blogs and getting confused because I’ve spent the last couple of years reading many different posts by female dumpers on Quora and it’s been extremely rare for me to see a post from a female that has a positive outcome. The majority always say “once I ghost someone, there’s no coming back,” Am I reading this wrong or is there another side that I’m not seeing? Please be patient with me because I’m still learning how to navigate this nightmare and to make myself a better person.
Hi Bill.
People, in general, tend not to change their minds very often. They stay resistant to change because doing so empowers them. Also, it’s not just women who are stubborn. Guys can be stubborn, too.
You should try to accept that your ex may not come back, Bill. When you do, you’ll free yourself from all this hope and pain.
Sincerely,
Zan
My ex boyfriend took me back a second time and dumped me again a second time By ghosting me. He has sent me breadcrumb text here and there, such as wishing me a happy new year and I replied back with the same energy and I have yet to heard back from him. I will not text him again or attempt to call him I am following the advice and will disappear, I have disappeared from his life we’ve been off for about a month almost 2 months and it has been him dropping breadcrumbs but I won’t bite I only return the same energy. I think the next text he sends me based on the context (if its a BS greeting and no “hey lets talk”) I may not even answer at all and continue the silence. He’s already done this to me before and the second time around I’m not stranger too is not my first rodeo with this game player. He can look back on the beautiful two months when I was with him again. We had very intimate strong romantic sensual moments. He can’t take that away there’s nothing negative for him to go by this time around, there is something wrong with him for him to ghost me like that and play games with me and I’m not gonna stick around to find out. Like I said the second time around is all positive moments with this guy. The first time I beat myself up because I thought it was my fault only to find that he has a tendency to drop someone he’s romantically linked to and in this case that’s me. He treats everyone else with respect such as friends and family but with me he treated me like a back burner or a doormat boyfriend. He excluded me from his life and we went out in secret, went out to eat at places where our friends wouldn’t see us, went out where no one would see us anyway. No more
Hi All the wiser.
You need to stand up for yourself now. No more talking to him or you’ll keep feeling used and unworthy of him. You can just tell him not to reach out anymore – and that’s that.
You’ve got this!
Zan
Hi Zan, everything you said in your article is so true. I discovered your blog a few months after my ex broke it off with me. I made a lot of mistakes in the beginning by contacting him and telling him how I feel and wanting him back in my life. You were right the only way to get an ex back is to go indefinite NC. You have helped me to stay strong and to go No Contact. Since our breakup he had sent breadcrumbs but continue to stay in NC. The only reason why we broke it off because I didn’t make more time for him a and we were in a long distance relationship. I took him for granted. Now it has been almost 3 years since our breakup and he reached out to me around Christmas. At first I thought it was another breadcrumb but then I realized this time was different. We talked on the phone and for the first time he actually opened up to me and had a real meaningful conversation with me. He talked about his life and his kids. He even sent me pics for the first time. He actually was interested in what’s been happening in my life as well and also hinted that he’s single. He’s no longer with his rebound. I played it cool and I don’t bring her up or ask any questions. We’ve been in contact since. He told me that when I am in town visiting my friends I am always welcome to stay at his place when he and the kids are not there. Also in a text recently he called me sweetheart. He mentioned wanting to take things slow because he will get too emotional if he sees me now. It’s like we are getting to know each other again. I always knew in my heart that he would come back to me one day but only when he gets hurt. Any advice you can give is greatly appreciated. Do you think he wants me back and if so it’s been almost 3 years.
Another thing I didn’t know how to respond when he called me sweetheart. All I said was thanks that’s so sweet. My question is do I talk to him like the way we used to when we were together. I used to signed off with kisses and tell him how much I miss him because we’re long distance. I am not sure how to act or what to say. What do you think Zan?
Hi TT.
It seems your ex is open to the idea of getting back together. He probably wouldn’t mention he’s single and call you sweetheart if he wasn’t interested. Talk to him and see if he wants to get to know you again. Act natural. There’s no need to send him kisses and invest in him unless he does the same.
Best regards,
Zan
Zan,. My ex recently mentioned about meeting up soon. He lives in a different state
He also been sending me blowing a kiss and heart emojis. I don’t want to let my guards down. When we broke up I never got closure. It was through a phone call. We were in a long distance relationship. Why is he possibly wanting to reconcile after almost 3 years of being apart? Do I bring up the breakup and ask about his rebound when we do meet up? Or should I just let it go? Right now I am playing it cool.
Hi TT.
Something probably went wrong on his end, so he’s looking to get closer to you.
You can ask about his rebound if you need answers. No need to be afraid. If he wants you back, he’ll answer all and any questions.
Kind regards,
Zan