He Loves Me But He’s Marrying Someone Else

Are you interested in a guy who says he loves you but is marrying someone else? If you are, you need to know that people don’t always say “I love you” because they love you. Sometimes they say it because they’re afraid of telling you the truth and hurting your feelings.

They’d rather not see you get hurt because that would hurt them and force them to face the consequences. So what they do is they say “I love you” even though they mean the opposite.

By doing so, they don’t only deceive you and give you false hope, but also make it hard for you to trust people in the future.

When a guy who’s about to get married says he loves you, you need to look at his actions, not words. His actions determine how he feels about you and what plans he has with you. So don’t concern yourself with words too much. Words can support actions when you’re in a relationship. But when you’re not in a relationship, they’re nothing but empty words that serve the guy better than they serve you.

They relieve the guy’s guilt and worries and allow him to slowly fade from your life.

Since guys use I love yous on exes they’ve fallen out of love with, people they never loved (friends, coworkers, acquaintances), and partners they still love but can’t marry because of disapproving parents, it’d be wrong to generalize and say that all guys feel the same way.

The truth is that some guys may actually have some feelings for the person they’re hurting but lack the authority to do anything about it. This is true only for guys with disapproving parents who are forced to leave their partner and marry someone else.

Such guys may initially still love their ex, but after listening to their parents’ disapproval and spending time with their new girlfriend/wife, they normally fall out of love with their previous partner. This is because their parents put them through so much stress, anger, and anxiety that they begrudgingly end up agreeing with their parents and focus solely on their new partner.

In this post, we’ll talk about what it means when a guy loves you but marries someone else.

When an ex loves you but marries someone else

If anyone loves saying I love yous for no apparent reason, it’s got to be dumpers. Sympathetic dumpers sometimes feel so bad for their ex-partner that they tell their ex everything she wants to hear. This includes things like, “I love you, I miss you, I think about you a lot, I want to be with you but can’t…”

Words like these completely confuse heartbroken dumpees as dumpees immediately assume that their ex has been thinking about them and wanting to get back with them. In reality, though, an ex who says he loves you when he’s marrying someone else is usually just feeling guilty. He feels bad for settling down with someone new while his ex is still single, grieving the loss of the relationship.

I may sound pessimistic, but I’d like you to know that your ex’s “love” doesn’t mean what you think it does. All it means is that your ex feels horrible for his selfish actions and that he doesn’t want to cause you any more pain and suffering. He just wants you to be happy and find someone else so that he can forgive himself and move on peacefully.

If you have a difficult time understanding what I just said because you still love your ex and hope that he’ll return, you need to know that your ex doesn’t feel about you the way you feel about him. He only cares about you as a friend, or rather, as an ex-partner, and doesn’t want to hurt you just because he’s starting a new chapter of his life with someone else.

What can you do when an ex is marrying someone else?

As a dumpee, there’s nothing you can do about an ex who’s marrying someone else. Your ex has decided to be with that person for life, so you can’t just talk your ex out of it. You shouldn’t really need to. If your ex loved you, he wouldn’t have proposed to his girlfriend and/or agreed to marry her.

He would have done everything in his power to get out of that relationship and come back to you.

This is why it’s better for your health that you think of your ex as someone who cares about you as a person, but not as a romantic partner. It’s hard to say exactly how much your ex cares about you, but I think that if your ex truly cared about you, he wouldn’t be telling you that he loves you just when he’s about to swear an oath by the altar. He’d have more respect for you, himself, as well as his fiance.

But let’s assume that he doesn’t know what he’s doing and that his “loving actions” delay your healing more than if he were honest and said, “I fell out of love with you. I don’t want to hurt you more than I have, so I’ll give you some space to heal. Please don’t hesitate to reach out if you’re struggling to cope with anxiety. I’ll do my best to help.”

This would have been ideal. But instead of admitting that he fell out of love with you, he’s saying that he is in love with you and that he’s somehow being forced into marriage.

I’m not sure what better advice to give you than to tell you to give up on this person. Forget about his false promises and everything he says and cut him off. It will be hard to get away from him at first, but when you do, you’ll heal from him once and for all.

What can you do when a friend or someone you know tells you he loves you but is marrying someone else?

If you have feelings for someone (let’s say your friend) and your friend tells you he loves you even though he’s marrying someone else, what you’re dealing with is rejection. The guy doesn’t want to reciprocate your feelings and be with you because he loves someone else.

Reasoning with this person and trying to get him to make him fall in love with you isn’t going to work. The guy won’t choose you because he has plans to marry someone else. Someone he loves and wants to be with.

In the movies, we often see people opposing marriages and being chosen by the person they love, but in real life, this doesn’t happen very often. It can’t happen because your friend wouldn’t be marrying someone else if he truly loved you. He wouldn’t do it even if he knew that you loved him.

Marriage is a serious thing and people rarely settle for someone they don’t want to be with when they know they can be with someone better suited for them. Those who are unsure about marriage tend to get cold feet and run away. They don’t get through with the marriage and stay unhappy in it just because they agreed to get married.

And yes, there are people who marry their partner and divorce their partner months later. But such people don’t marry their partner because they don’t love him. They marry him because they act on their honeymoon emotions and ignore all the red flags.

So if you’re wondering what to do when a guy tells you he loves you but wants to marry someone else, my advice is to back off. Get some space from the guy (as well as his partner) and let them give their marriage their best. Remind yourself that if your friend wanted to be with you that he would have done something about it already.

He wouldn’t just settle for some random person and commit to her for life.

Not unless:

1. The relationship was new and he was marrying her on impulse.
2. He’d already gotten to know her as a person and was sure he wanted to be with her.

I know a guy who married his foreign girlfriend solely because he needed to bring her abroad. This couple had quite a rocky relationship from the beginning and was on and off for a while before they decided to move in together and get married. In my opinion, they shouldn’t have gotten married because their relationship was struggling to survive and marriage was only going to make things worse.

Anyway, not only did they both expect different things from each other, but their problem-solving skills were also not good enough for their relationship to work. Because of this as well as other unresolved differences and incompatibilities, they didn’t know how to work together, so they drifted apart, divorced, and met someone else.

The point is that there are couples who go through with the marriage despite knowing that their relationship needs a lot more work. But even couples like this typically don’t marry someone they have no feelings for.

What if your boyfriend loves you but his parents forced him to marry someone else?

In this particular case, your boyfriend actually means what he says. He may not be strong enough or be able to fight for love, but at least he was honest when he told you he still loves you. Your boyfriend doesn’t want to ghost you to marry another person because if it were up to him, he’d marry you.

But given the situation that he’s in, he can’t fight with his parents. He probably did for a while, but when he realized that they aren’t giving in, he gave up and agreed to marry the person they wanted him to marry.

You probably wonder how come he’s able to throw away the bond he’s developed with you and marry someone else, but you need to understand that it may be for the best that he’s given up. It’s not what you want, but it’s better that he gives up now than to get together with him only to learn that you can’t get along with his parents.

I’ve learned that disapproving parents are the worst. They can make you feel like you’re not good enough to marry their son or daughter and cause you to blame yourself. As I said before, you don’t want your partner’s parents to dislike you. If they dislike you at the beginning of the relationship, they will most likely despise you even if you marry the guy and have kids with him.

Parents who disapprove of others don’t change easily. They normally change only when there’s a risk that they’ll lose something valuable to them.

WIth that said, here are 6 reasons why he loves you but is marrying someone else.

How to deal with a guy marrying someone else?

Here are a few healthy tips on how to deal with a guy whoclaims he loves you but is marrying someone else.

Don’t overreact. The guy might have said he loves you, but his actions clearly prove otherwise. It’d be wise not to call him a liar or something mean because if you do, he most likely won’t return to you if his relationship fails.

Respect his decision. Even if you find the guy extremely unfair, you need to respect his decision. There’s nothing you can do to stop him from marrying someone else. He’d made his decision and you need to accept it no matter how difficult it is.

Learn what he meant when he said he loves you. You need to understand that the chances of him loving you despite marrying someone else are slim. He probably wouldn’t have agreed to marry another woman if he loved you more than her.

Calm yourself down. It can be upsetting to know that a guy you like is marrying someone else. But as upsetting as it is, find a way to control your anger, sadness, and the need to ask him why he lied to you.

Forgive him for deceiving you. Don’t take revenge or anything that can cause damage to his relationship. It’s not worth ruining his and your life because of it.

Don’t pretend you’re okay with it. You don’t need to congratulate the guy and tell him you want his marriage to succeed. Do what you would want him to do if the situation was reversed.

Heal your emotional wounds. It will take some time to get over him, but you can do it if you put your mind to it. Make it a personal goal to heal from the traumatic experience.

Go indefinite no contact. By going no contact, you’ll be able to fix your shortcomings and enjoy your life again.

Follow the rules of no contact. Don’t stalk him or and watch how happy they are on social media. Unfriend/unfollow them instead and divert your attention to more meaningful things.

Accept that he’s a part of the past. Get rid of pictures and gifts that remind you of him and delete his phone number. You mustn’t hold on to the past.

Accept that you weren’t meant to be. He’s marrying someone else which is why you must assume that he wants to spend his life with her.

Surround yourself with people who love you and support you. Spend some time with your friends and family. They are your rock.

Journal your thoughts and emotions. If you’re struggling to cope with anxiety and your friends aren’t around to help, write down how you feel. Doing so will help you organize your thoughts and emotions and speed up your healing.

Focus on your goals. You don’t need this person to focus on your goals and ambitions. Now’s the time to use your spare time by focusing on things that give meaning to your life.

Don’t hate the guy. Hating him for saying one thing and doing something else won’t do you any good. It will just make you feel worse and hinder your growth.

And that’s it. It sucks to see someone you like marrying someone else, but it’s best that you don’t stick around and keep hoping that his marriage fails. Life is too short to waste on someone who doesn’t feel the same way about you.

Did someone you know say he loves you even though he’s marrying someone else? Leave your comment below.

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Angelie

I’m Angelie, a writer and a designer at Magnet of Success. Whether I’m writing compelling content or designing engaging pictures, I create content that resonates with our visitors and aids them on their self-improvement journey. I enjoy writing about relationship dynamics and the difficulties couples may face.