Why Do Girls Like Bad Boys So Much?

Girls like bad boys because bad boys appear confident, outspoken, and self-sufficient. They take care of their needs very well and don’t stress too much about what others think of them. They worry mainly about themselves and as a result, appear to have their lives in order.

And that’s what attracts girls to them. Girls want stability, respect, and a future and think that bad boys who respect themselves can give it to them. They think they can give them what they want and make them feel secure.

It’s usually months later when they realize that they couldn’t have been more wrong.

They realize they didn’t get attracted to bad boys because of their amazing traits, manners, and relationship skills but because bad boys knew how to make a good first impression.

They knew how to present themselves as attractive individuals who were ready to settle down and start a family.

When girls see past their facade is when they finally notice that bad boys have flaws too and that they ignored or couldn’t see those flaws because they focused mainly on their good qualities. On qualities that their boyfriends wanted them to see.

So if you’re looking for reasons why girls like bad boys, the biggest reason is that girls are programmed both genetically and societally to seek guys who give them a sense of comfort and safety. They feel pulled toward such guys because such guys appear to be their missing halves.

Their behavior exudes strength and shows that they’re able to take care of themselves, their girlfriends and also provide for their families.

Bad boys typically have a lot of experience conversing with women and dating them. It’s not that they always know what to say to them, but that they aren’t afraid of failure. They’re confident in their skin and have an abundant mindset that makes them believe they can be with almost any girl or woman they want.

They just have to show the girl they like their best side and pretend that they really are the best versions of themselves.

What girls don’t immediately realize though is that bad boys aren’t just confident about who they are and what they can accomplish. They’re also arrogant. And there’s a huge difference between these two terms.

Confidence is when a guy accepts his flaws and can comfortably converse with someone he may or may not find attractive.

Arrogance, on the other hand, usually comes with experience and validation. The more women a guy’s been with, the more certain he becomes that he’s attractive and that he can choose who to be with. Such a guy usually starts to think that he’s a catch and that he can take his time to find the best woman on the market before he commits to her and settles down.

Because bad boys date so many women, you would think that they have experience with relationships and that they are the best guys you can be with. But, unfortunately, that is seldom the case. There’s also a difference between guys who jump from one relationship to the next like grasshoppers and guys who stay in relationships for years.

That difference is that grasshoppers operate from a place of ego and tend to look for a perfect person who doesn’t exist. Deep inside, they know they can date almost anyone and that they don’t need to stay in a relationship when problems arise.

They can just leave, start fresh, meet someone new, and go through the love stage again.

This kind of thinking traps cocky guys in a situation where they move from one woman to the next without reflecting on their issues and making the necessary improvements that would allow them to get serious with someone they find attractive.

In this post, we’ll go into more detail about why girls like bad boys. We’ll talk about why they get attracted to them and why they break up with them or get dumped by them.

Why do girls like bad boys

Why do girls like bad boys?

Single girls like bad boys because bad boys resemble dark fictional characters from books and movies who are successful and still looking for love. In girls’ eyes, such guys are their perfect dating candidates as they seem to be waiting for the right girl to show them the way and help them transform their lives.

They’re alpha males who “are lost” and “need help.”

But, unfortunately, help is not something bad boys are looking for. Bad boys may indeed be in desperate need of guidance, but the real world isn’t a scripted fairy tale. It’s much more realistic as guys with personal issues usually aren’t even aware that they have issues.

More often than not, they think they’re completely fine, so they downplay their issues when they arise and blame anyone who disagrees with them or tries to help them.

This is because many people suffer from metathesiophobia – the fear of change. I’m not talking about the fear of changing habits and interests but changing who we are at the core. We tend to reject change when someone tells us we’re not good enough because that person hurts our ego.

He disagrees with our beliefs and destroys our expectations, which normally makes us respond defensively.

This is the dark reality of human nature. So imagine how guys must feel when a woman – practically a stranger comes out of nowhere and tries to change them. I can tell you that most guys feel that she doesn’t know half their story and that she’s overstepping her boundaries.

She’s trying to help them even though they don’t want to be helped. If they wanted help, they would have gotten it already and wouldn’t wait for their girlfriend to turn into a psychologist.

And that’s what makes these nice girl-bad boy relationships so difficult. Girls sincerely believe that they’ll have a good relationship if they meet a person who needs their nurturing.

But the truth is that girls with such beliefs usually get the opposite. They get a guy who resists change like the devil and treats them like someone with no worth or value to them.

Furthermore, it’s important to note that some girls like bad boys because they’re similar to them. Just like bad boys, some girls also have unresolved issues from the past and lack in the personal development department. That’s why they attract like-minded guys who value the same things as them.

We’re talking about things like:

  • looks
  • confidence
  • financial success
  • social status
  • fame
  • and other superficial traits or assets they can benefit from

Girls like this usually have a lot of dating experience, but not enough experience in resolving differences and conflict. They look for external features, which is why they clash when they decide to date a guy who’s in the same boat as them.

And lastly, there are good girls who are just looking for love and randomly stumble across bad boys who suddenly pay attention to them. Such girls feel that they’ve attracted a guy who’s very charming and good-looking and feel that they’re talking to someone who’s way out of their league.

Because of such a difference in interest, they normally overwhelm the guy in the early stages of dating or cause him to break up with them because of jealousy, arguments, or commitment issues.

Sometimes they also break up with the guy. But they do that only if they feel disrespected by the guy’s behavior and have decent self-esteem.

Anyway, here are 7 reasons why girls like bad boys.

7 Reasons why girls like bad boys

Why do girls stay with bad boys?

In relationships, girls stay with bad boys because bad boys make them think that they are the most valuable guys they can be with. First, they hurt them and make them dependent on them. And when they’ve left them alone for a while, they come back for them and present themselves as saviors who can help them.

This is how they make their girlfriends think that they are serious about them and that all relationships have ups and downs.

Bad boys in relationships essentially give girls a false sense of safety. They unknowingly make them experience extreme lows and extreme highs and make them reliant on happy hormones.

One day, girls feel valued and supported, and the next, they feel mistreated and deserted. But despite being unhappy so often, girls tend to remain committed to their partners. They can’t leave them because of low or lowered self-esteem and the difference in power.

For them to leave, they have to feel so disrespected that they change the way they perceive their partner and feel victimized. That’s how they can slowly start to grow strong and understand that leaving is better than staying committed to someone who hurts them and isn’t interested in growing with them.

So to answer the question, “Why do girls like bad boys in a relationship,” the shocking truth is that they’re emotionally dependent on them. They don’t have the strength to separate themselves from their boyfriend because they associate more pain and anxiety with losing their boyfriend than with detaching from their boyfriend and regaining their independence.

This means that there are 3 types of girls who like bad boys:

  • Girls who mistake confidence for arrogance.
  • Girls who are similar to bad boys.
  • And girls who have poor self-esteem.

All three types of girls like bad boys for their confidence (the way they guys approach women and talk to them). They fantasize about the idea of what their relationship could become rather than what it is or what it will be.

That’s why they often rush into a relationship with them and ignore all the early warning signs of a bad relationship. They just don’t take the time to ask important questions and learn more about the person they have a crush on. It’s as if they’re afraid of doing a little background check and just jump in headfirst.

It’s no surprise that they start finding out things about the guy when it’s too late – when they’re already attached to him and deeply in love.

Do relationships with bad boys last?

Most of the time, relationships with bad boys don’t work out. They may last, but they don’t last forever.

And that’s because bad boys are fundamentally different from nice girls. They have different wants and needs, different understandings, and most importantly, different maturity. They’re hard-headed and bad at communicating, which is why their relationships keep getting worse with time.

Unlike healthy couples who talk about their differences and improve their relationships, incompatible couples neglect their relationships and work against each other. This is how they exhaust their relationships, detach from each other, and ultimately, start thinking about being with someone else.

The only reason why these relationships sometimes last longer than they should is that couples have a codependent relationship. They need each other rather than want each other, so they stay together for as long as one of them depends on the other for love and recognition.

When that is no longer the case and encounter bigger issues, they soon pull away and find someone else to date.

And of course, it’s not always guys who break up with girls. Girls sometimes break up with bad boys too. They usually do that when they find out that their boyfriend is talking to other women, flirting with them, refusing to communicate, or displaying signs of immaturity and poor commitment.

Relationships with bad boys just don’t last because it takes two self-aware, mature, and committed individuals to make a relationship work. One person alone can’t put in all the work and expect the other to improve. She can hope that her partner will have an epiphany and grow up.

But the odds of that happening are low. It’s much more likely that a bad boy will improve himself when he experiences a great loss and reflects. In other words, when he loses something he cares about and suffers immensely.

Everyone’s heard of the phrase “Nice guys finish last.” But is this true? Do nice guys really finish last? I think it’s true only if you consider the finish to be the start. Nice guys definitely have fewer dating opportunities than bad boys do.

But the most important thing you need to understand is that it’s not about how many relationships you’ve been in. It’s about the quality of the people you attract and the success of your relationships. That says a lot about who you are as a person and how developed you are.

The quality of your relationships determines the quality of your life

Because nice guys are usually a bit insecure and self-doubtful, people often forget the advantage nice guys have over bad boys. Yes, there’s an advantage. And that advantage is that they reflect more and question their behavior regularly. This allows them to mature fast and consequently, helps them to finish ahead of bad boys and even though bad boys had a head start.

So if you’re a nice guy who hasn’t had the opportunity to date dozens of model women in your life, think about your personality and skills. Think about all the work you’ve done on yourself and the relationships you’ve had and will have because of it.

Relationships aren’t just about dating as many people as possible. They’re about learning how to make your relationship work with someone you love and care about. That’s something worthy of respectโ€”and not the number of women you’ve been with and failed miserably with.

What do you think? Why do girls like bad boys? Post your thoughts and experiences below the post.

2 thoughts on “Why Do Girls Like Bad Boys So Much?”

  1. Wow Zan I think this is one of best article!!! Now I understand why this happens and to prevent it for even happening

    Thank you for this and all other help you give me ๐Ÿค

    Reply

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