Is He Thinking About Me Even Though We Don’t Talk?

Whether the guy in question is your ex or someone you like very much, don’t think that the guy isn’t thinking about you. When a guy is used to talking to you, he notices every sudden change in dynamics. He notices that something’s gone or missing, so he develops awareness and thinks about you from time.

How much time he spends thinking about you is anyone’s guess as it depends on how busy he is, how attached he is, how important you are to him, and what his latest impression of you is.

I suppose the mother of all questions is how he thinks of you. If he sees you merely as a temporary distraction that entertains him occasionally, he likely thinks about you only when he’s bored and has no one better to talk to. But if he has a strong emotional connection with you (a bond), then he likely misses that bond and wishes he could get more of it.

You can tell what kind of connection you have with the guy and what you mean to him simply by examining your relationship with him and figuring out why you stopped talking. When you understand what went wrong, you’ll also understand whether this person is good for you and if you should stay hopeful he’s the one.

So put the guy under the microscope and dissect him. Unplug your feelings and learn if there are any benefits to being with him. You may realize that he’s not worth the trouble and that you can be happier without him.

If I can be completely honest, when a guy stops responding to calls and text messages, that normally isn’t a very good sign. It shows that the guy is playing power games, isn’t interested, isn’t emotionally ready, or if he’s an ex, that he fell out of love with you and needs time to himself.

Whatever the case may be, you have an important decision to make. You have to decide whether you should initiate a conversation with the guy or leave him alone until he puts in some effort and balances out the interest in the relationship.

And that’s what I’m going to help you with in this article. The advice I have for you is very simple and goes like this.

If the guy stopped talking to you (and not vice versa), you shouldn’t call or text him because the guy is well aware of the fact that you messaged or called him last. He just doesn’t care enough about it to respond and make some kind of excuse.

Of course, he could be busy and have something important to take care of, but that doesn’t mean that he’ll stay busy 24 hours a day, every day. The guy wouldn’t risk putting you on the backburner for a long time because he’d be afraid of stringing you along, hurting you, and risk making you detach and fall in love with another person.

A guy who likes you and has plans for you would respond as soon as he could and strive to keep you interested.

However, if the guy texted you last or if the conversation fizzled out on its own, then there could be another explanation for his lack of effort. It’s possible that the guy doesn’t want to overpursue (might be afraid of rejection) and that a little push is all he needs to start communicating with you again. He could be very insecure or have other problems you don’t know about.

Maybe he got betrayed in the past and developed trust issues. Or perhaps he has an avoidant attachment style or isn’t quite sure about being with you yet. In that case, you can just reach out and see how the guy responds.

You need to understand that not all guys act the same when it comes to communication. Some guys are very expressive and respond right away while others find texting difficult and impersonal and prefer to talk in person. The latter usually applies to people who grew up without smartphones and aren’t used to instant communication.

But despite that, I think that if a guy likes you, he won’t just ignore your texts. He’ll actually respond at his earliest convenience and try to meet up with you even if he has to cross deserts to arrange a meeting.

So first things first, figure out if this guy’s lost interest and started ignoring you. Is he ghosting you? If he is and it’s been a few days already, it’s evident that the guy prioritizes himself and/or doesn’t want to respond to you. He wants to focus on himself because if he cared and had something to offer to you, he would at least say “Sorry, something urgent came up” or do something that acknowledges your efforts.

I’m not pretending to know the guy, but one thing I know for certain is that a person who wants you romantically will try to impress you. He’ll respond when you reach out—and he’ll do it in a way that makes you respect him, like him, and want to see him.

Yes, people occasionally have emergencies and personal matters to attend to, but if a guy completely shuts you out of his life because he has a lot on his plate, this means that the guy either doesn’t find you worthy or that he’s a bad communicator and that a relationship with him won’t be any easier if you become a couple.

If anything, it will be harder.

So if you’re thinking to yourself, “Is he thinking about me even if we don’t talk,” know that he definitely is thinking about you. The brain is a complex organ that can’t just forget the past. It especially can’t forget the past if it experienced lots of memories and strong emotions.

Is he thinking about me even though we don’t talk?

Yes, the guy you’re analyzing is thinking about you even though you don’t talk. He’s thinking about you at work, at home, when he’s out with friends, and when he’s minding his business. The stronger an impression you’d made on the guy before the communication ended, the more often he thinks about you and wonders what you’re up to.

The problem though isn’t with him not thinking about you. It’s that the guy may not hold you in the highest regard possible. He may think you’re not a great romantic match for him and that it’s better not to communicate anymore.

If you recently met this person, he could still be married for all you know and have another woman in his life that he’s still trying to make it work with.

That would mean he’s trying to cut you out to focus on things that are more important to him.

I know this sounds awful, but guys often stop responding when they meet someone else. They lose attraction to the woman they communicated with for a while and get closer to someone else. That’s how they manage to happily transition from one relationship to the next and keep the love hormones going.

Such guys may give you attention for a while and appear to be into you. But they also lose interest just as quickly because they aren’t looking or ready for anything serious. They still want to explore other options and see who they can benefit from the most.

This is why it doesn’t matter whether the guy you like is thinking about you or not. If he’s not talking to you, he’s busy with things he deems to be more important. And you need to engrave that into your brain that so you can stop yourself from getting more attached to him.

In my opinion, you should give a guy a few days to get back to you. A few days are more than enough for him to apologize for not responding and state his reasons for ditching you.

If he says he was busy, stressed, overburdened with work, these are, of course, just excuses. A guy who says these things will always have more important things to do and fail to meet your emotional needs. At least while he’s with you because you’ll both be tending to your own needs.

In other words, you’ll both desire and prioritize different things, which means that staying with him will be difficult. You’ll have to become okay with what you get and not ask for more. If you ask for more, you’ll suffocate him and appear needy.

So if you’re still wondering if the guy is thinking about you even though you don’t talk, keep in mind that he is. He remembers the good and bad times he’d spent with you and feels that you’re no longer around. But despite knowing you’re absent, he may not necessarily crave your presence and wish to speak with you again. He may just want to focus on himself and other women.

With that said, here’s when a guy is thinking about you after you’ve stopped talking.

If you ended the relationship on good terms, the guy will likely continue to have good perceptions of you and reach out when something goes wrong or when he becomes curious about you. Make sure to give him as much time as he needs so that he can discover your worth and find a reason to communicate again.

Can I make him think about me more?

Unfortunately, you can’t make a guy think about you more by playing jealousy games with him and trying to manipulate him. Most guys get offended or annoyed when they see girls behave so insecurely, so they usually block or unfollow them. They just don’t want to watch them act like they’ve moved on because it hurts their ego and pride.

Instead of playing mind games with the guy who stopped talking to you, I suggest, that you remain true to your character. Be the person you are and want to be because there’s no point in hurting him to make him care about you. In all honesty, you should avoid hurting him because if you hurt him, you’ll bring out his dark side and see how he acts or reacts when he’s in pain and feels wronged.

So take a different approach. One that involves no hurting, begging, annoying, or opposing the guy’s decision. That approach is called no contact. We usually talk about it when a guy or woman dumps his/her ex and causes immense separation anxiety and pain.

But this regimen will also work on the guy you dated or wanted to date as the guy has decided to focus on himself. He became interested in himself and/or others, so let him. Let him do what he wants because that’s the only way he’ll ever respect you and want to speak with you again.

You can ask him why he ditched you later. But as long as he’s not replying to you and doesn’t care what you think and feel about him, he’s not worth the trouble. You’ll be much happier if you worry about yourself and talk to someone who actually makes time to speak with you.

That guy is somewhere out there waiting for you. You just don’t know that he is because your focus is still on the guy who stopped talking to you.

You’ll make him think about you if you think about yourself

I know it makes no sense that the guy will think about you more when you stop thinking about him, but it’s true. Guys who are still looking for a person to be with tend to respect and desire women who pay less attention to them. Such women appear less needy – more independent, so they attract guys like bees to honey and make them crave their recognition.

I’m not saying you should act like you don’t care and play with his feelings, but if you focus on yourself, you’ll hit two birds with one stone. You won’t only feel better and get your emotional independence back but also make yourself look as attractive as possible. You’ll show that you don’t need the guy in your life to be happy, which the guy could then interpret as you not finding him valuable, attractive, and worth your time.

That could then spark curiosity and possibly even a desire to be loved and validated. I suppose this depends on how unlucky he is in general. The more things go wrong, the higher the chances that he’ll miss you.

So forget about proving your worth to a guy who stopped replying to you. There’s no need to do that because you have nothing to prove to a guy like that. The only people you should want to impress in your life are those who are committed to you and value you for the person you are.

This includes your friends, family, and your romantic partner – the guy who knows that losing you would be painful and a big inconvenience.

Are you still wondering if a guy is thinking about you even though you don’t talk anymore? Did you find the answers you’ve been searching for? If you did, that’s great. And if you didn’t and would like to share your story, post your comment below the article. I’ll get back to you soon.

Also, if you want to talk 1-on-1 with us about your relationship or breakup, have a look at our coaching options. You might prefer that to leaving a comment.

Zan

My name is Zan and I’m the founder of Magnet of Success. I enjoy writing realistic relationship and breakup articles and helping readers heal and grow. With more than 5 years of experience in the self-improvement, relationship, and breakup sphere, my goal is to provide advice that fosters positivity and success and avoids preventable mistakes and pain. Learn more about me or get in touch today.