Why Is My Ex Liking My Friends’ Pictures?

Sometimes dumpers keep liking our friends’ pictures on social media even though we’re no longer in a relationship with them. They don’t do this to confuse us or annoy us (even though it tends to have that effect on us), but rather because they want to stay friends with our friends and be cordial with them.

They want things to stay exactly as they are between them and make sure that their breakup doesn’t affect people. Especially their friends and family because those are the people who mean the most to them and hold positive opinions about them.

So if your ex is liking your friends’ pictures and you don’t know why, the first thing you need to do is relax. Relax, take a deep breath, and try to understand that your ex isn’t doing anything to sabotage your friendships.

Your ex is merely being a considerate friend as he or she wants to virtually acknowledge and support your friends.

Your ex wants to prove to himself/herself as well as others that your friends are innocent bystanders who have nothing to do with the breakup.

And because they have nothing to do with it, your ex doesn’t feel the need to stop interacting with them.

Stopping all communication with them because you want your ex to stop wouldn’t only be controlling and possessive of you, but it’d also be disrespectful to the friendships your ex has developed.

It’d be a very bitter and envious move that says, “You can’t like my friends’ posts and talk to them because they were my friends first.”

This reminds me of the time when I was in kindergarten. If I seized a certain toy before my friends did, I immediately assumed it belonged to me for the duration of the playtime and that I can do what I want with it. It was only until some time later that I learned to share toys with my peers.

And this is the exact same thing lots of adults struggle with even today. It’s not that they don’t share things, but that they possess people and refuse to share them or loosen their grip on them. They think that because they’re attached to them that those people are obliged to do what they instruct them to do and remain loyal to them.

But that’s not how things work. In this day and age, no one owes you anything. Not a friend, not a family member, and certainly not an ex who’s still liking your friends’ pictures.

You have to remember that your friends and your ex have a mind of their own and that you must respect their choices.

So instead of possessing your friends like a ghost and telling them what they can and can’t do, experience them.

Treat them kindly with respect and show them you trust them in making their own decisions.

And while you’re doing that, try not to overthink questions like, “Why is my ex liking my friends’ pictures.” The answer you’re looking for is probably way simpler than you think. Your ex most likely just wants to carry on as if the breakup never occurred while staying on good terms with your friends.

Don’t let it get to you

If your ex is liking your friends’ pictures, your ex isn’t doing that to annoy you, hurt you, make you jealous, or confuse you. If your ex wanted to cause you pain, he or she would take a much more direct approach.

One that brings a strong reaction out of you and gives your ex the satisfaction of knowing that he or she still has control over your feelings.

But since your ex isn’t being vengeful and is merely liking your friends’ pictures for the sake of liking them, it’s safe to say that your ex is interacting with your friends for your friends’ sake as well as for himself or herself.

Your ex is putting in minimum effort because it feels right and because it’s the least your ex can do to show he or she is cool with your friends.

That’s why there’s no need to take your ex’s behavior personally and assume your ex is out to get you. There’s no need to tell your ex and your friends to stop interacting with one another either.

Conversely, give them the freedom to decide if they want to remain in touch and be glad that they get along at least to some degree.

Of course, you don’t need to mix your ex and your friends together and pretend everything is okay, but you do need to adopt a healthy mindset and make sure you want your ex and your friends not to get affected by the breakup.

One of the worst things friends can do is that they side with the dumpee or the dumper after the breakup and end their friendship because of it. So try not to drag your friends in your mess and instead, try to be more accepting of your ex’s social media behavior and do your best to let go of the past.

Let go of the issues that caused the breakup and acknowledge your current feelings of envy, jealousy, fear, anger, resentment, or thoughts that your social media would look cleaner if your ex didn’t like your friends’ pictures and statuses.

The sooner you do this, the quicker you’ll realize that worrying about your ex’s virtual likes is completely unnecessary and a waste of time and emotions.

Why is my ex liking my friends’ pictures?

Unless you dumped your ex and your ex is liking everyones’ pictures in a fury of grief, your ex’s reason for liking your friends’ pictures is probably irrelevant to you.

It’s most likely got something to do with your ex wanting to tell your friends that things are okay between them and that he or she likes what’s on the pictures.

By doing so, your ex achieves four things:

• Supports your friends ?
• Does the morally right thing ?✨
• Depicts personal strength and values ?
• Reassures himself or herself that it’s possible to be nice to your friends ?

It’s unlikely that your ex and your friends will start chatting and hanging out because of a few social media likes. But if they do, ask your friends not to talk about your ex for a while.

You probably need some time to detach from your ex if the breakup is fresh.

Anyway, here are 5 reasons why your ex keeps liking your friends’ pictures.

Remember that not everything your ex does on social media is about you. Sometimes exes just like pictures because they like them and not because they want to send mysterious messages and make their exes’ lives difficult.

Bear that in mind if you can’t help but wonder, “Why is my ex liking my friends’ pictures so often?”

What to do when your ex likes your friends’ pictures?

If you’re the dumper or if you’re over your ex, you probably don’t want your ex around because of your negative perceptions of him or her. You want your ex to leave your friends alone and stay out of your life because seeing your ex’s name and face makes you feel uncomfortable.

If this is how you feel, know that you have every right to feel that way. You’ve been hurt by your ex over and over again and now need some time to process the pain and find happiness again.

I get that. But don’t forget that happiness comes from within and that you shouldn’t just ignore your anger and frustrations. If you do ignore them, you could get used to handling things this way and deal with them the same way in your next relationship.

So start by improving the emotions that hurt you. Practice relaxation techniques and find ways to completely let go of your negative feelings.

This could take time, of course, but when you start negating your negative emotions, you’ll see that you feel uncomfortable because of all the pent-up anger and discontent—and not necessarily because your ex is the worst person on the planet.

You wouldn’t have agreed to be with your ex if he or she was the worst person on the planet, so give your ex a little bit of credit and stop your negative associations from getting the best of you.

Get rid of all your negative thoughts and feelings. You’ll live a much happier life if you process the past and deal with the lingering, self-harming bitterness properly.

But if you’re not over your ex yet or if your ex is doing something to hurt you (directly or indirectly), then you may want to unfollow your ex and/or stop using social media for a while.

It may seem like you’re running away from your problems at first, but after a while, you’ll realize that there is no such thing as refusing to face your problems after a breakup.

Sometimes distancing yourself from the cause of pain is the best and the only thing you can do for yourself as getting some space can help you recover from the shock of the breakup.

So if your ex’s liking of your friends’ pictures makes you feel uncomfortable, figure out why you feel that way.

Is it because your ex dumped you and hurt your feelings or conversely, because you’ve dumped your ex and can’t stand him or her anymore?

Discern where your pain, envy, disgust, or unhappiness comes from so that you can take appropriate action and deal with your unwanted emotions quickly and efficiently.

Acknowledge, learn, forgive, accept, and break free

The first step to dealing with unwanted breakup feelings or anchors is to get out of denial and acknowledge the way you feel. You don’t need to like it or pretend you like it. Just admit to yourself that you feel uncomfortable and that there’s a reason you feel that way.

And that’s it.

Once you’ve recognized your uneasy feelings, you’ll then need to learn where your emotions come from. The best way to do that is to reflect on your breakup and figure out what your ex did or didn’t do to make you feel that way.

Did your ex break your heart and treat you poorly afterward? Or conversely, did you break your ex’s heart because you weren’t happy with the traits your ex displayed throughout the relationship?

These are very basic questions that you can use to start your reflection process. Feel free to ask yourself many more questions so that you can get down to the root cause of your feelings.

Finding the reason why you don’t want your ex to like your friends’ pictures will give you the answers you need to understand yourself. So do some internal digging and learn why you’re so upset with your ex.

If you discern your ex has hurt you (or vice versa), you’ll obviously need to do something about it. You’ll need to forgive your ex because forgiving your ex will let you make peace with the past and open your heart up to the present and the future.

So don’t neglect this part if you’re struggling to get over the breakup. As long as you have strong negative feelings for someone, whether it’s anger, hatred, disgust jealousy, or sadness, you’ll never be free.

You’ll be a prisoner of your own past and a very unhappy person.

After forgiveness comes acceptance. This is usually the hardest part of recovery because you have very little control over it. You can’t just decide to be fine and process everything instantaneously.

Emotions obviously don’t work that way. They don’t have a switch that you can flick. Especially not if your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend abused you, treated you poorly, or made you codependent on him or her.

Unhealthy relationships take a very long time to process and accept because they require many internal changes. They require a person to adapt to a new lifestyle, regain their worth, learn to be independent, improve their strength, and find their own passion in life.

They take a big commitment. Bigger than most people are willing to admit.

So keep in mind that accepting the breakup and getting used to a life without your ex could take many weeks and months. But every month should feel a lot better than the previous.

It should also make you wiser provided that you’re working on yourself.

Lastly, you need to stick to everything mentioned in this chapter and work on breaking free from your ex’s grasp. What I mean is that you need to stay on your journey of self-discovery, improve your behavioral patterns, grow your moral values, and work on processing the fears and traumas that you have knowingly or unknowingly developed because of your ex.

Everyone has a fear of two that they grow from their traumatic breakup. If you can’t find yours, it’s possible that you’ve developed an emotional wall and that you’re guarding yourself against them.

There are many ways in which people protect themselves from fears. Some avoid them, some face them with drugs and alcohol, and others deal with them with anger, disgust, or some strong self-protective emotion.

Your job is to locate and deal with the emotion ruining your happiness so that your next relationship doesn’t suffer from trust issues and overprotective behavior.

Are you still thinking, “Why is my ex liking my friends’ pictures?” Did you find the answers you’ve been looking for? Comment below.

Or conversely, if you’re looking for personalized 1-on-1 guidance, click here to see our coaching plans.