What Does It Mean When A Guy Says He Thinks About You?

When a guy says he thinks about you, he means that something or someone reminded him of you and that you’ve been on his mind.

You’ve been voluntarily or involuntarily occupying his thoughts and reminded him that he misses your presence.

And because he misses you, we can safely assume that your lack of presence combined with his yearnings stirred an emotional response in him that caused him to express himself in an open, indirect, confusing manner.

If you’re still with me, please keep in mind that a guy thinking about you and missing you doesn’t necessarily indicate that he loves you and wants a relationship with you.

Human beings are far more complex than that and oftentimes tell their friends, partners, and even exes that they think about them, miss them, or love them.

They do this out of vulnerability and the desire for connection and attention.

For example, when guys feel unhappy with various events, decisions, and life in general, they tend to project their sentiments onto others with the intention to elicit some kind of feedback.

This feedback empowers them with the reassurance that helps them feel better about themselves.

And when they receive what they need and feel stronger as a result, they tend to pull away and leave their conversationalist confused.

This is why you need to understand that not all guys confess their feelings in a selfless manner. Sometimes they have different intentions that may be more self-centered.

And that’s what we’re going to talk about today.

If you’re wondering, “What does it mean when a guy says he thinks about you,” this article will give you some insight. It will provide you with a few possible answers and explanations, so please try to find the one that best fits your case.

What does it mean when a guy says he thinks about you

He uses it as an ice-breaker for staying out of contact

Oftentimes, a guy who’s stopped talking to a girl for a while doesn’t know how to casually start a conversation with her again. He’s too afraid that she’s lost all respect for him and that she’s going to reject him if he tries to win her over.

But because he feels a strong urge to speak to her and wants to know where she stands with him, he musters up the courage and decides to use reverse psychology on the girl.

He tells her he’s been thinking about her a lot and that he’s been meaning to contact her—but that he couldn’t because he’s been busy with various responsibilities, such as school or work.

Upon piquing the girl’s interest and receiving her attention, the guy then proceeds by apologizing and reassuring her that it won’t happen again.

He does this to portray himself in a light so bright that it melts the girl’s heart and gets him another chance with her.

Something bad happened to him

You likely already know that unhappiness is people’s greatest motivator. It forces people to make healthy adjustments and guides them toward happiness. All they need to be happy is an incentive to be happy (the desperation).

This is why a guy who says he thinks about you, misses you, loves you, or cares about you might not be very honest with you. He might be trying to make it seem as if it’s all about you and your happiness, while it’s actually all about his.

He could be on a mission to improve his happiness and well-being, so pay close attention to the motives behind his actions.

It’s possible that he recently got dumped, hurt, bored, bankrupt, or lonely. Something/anything affected his emotional state because every action demands a reaction.

It requires some kind of feedback that encourages, stimulates, reassures, repairs, or improves a person’s well-being.

So think about that for a minute and discern whether this guy’s actions are selfish or selfless. If they’re selfish, he needs you a lot more than you need him as he lacks the personal strength and ability to be content in life.

You’re his ticket to success.

He wants sex

Let’s face it. There are guys on this planet who sugar-coat everything they say to ladies just to appear nice and friendly. Such guys, of course merely appear that way.

They don’t intend to stay in girls’ lives for very long because there’s nothing convincing them to stay. They don’t have their priorities straight and lack the moral values to tell right from wrong.

All such wicked guys are after are quick sexual gratifications that could potentially boost their ego and improve their short-term well-being.

So if you come across guys who barely know you, compliment you for no apparent reason, and come flying into your life like a speeding bullet, raise a red flag.

Be wary of their intentions as such guys tend to ricochet out of girls’ lives the moment they get what they want.

They don’t care about girls’ feelings at all. Their actions are all about them.

He feels guilty for hurting you

Dumpees (people who get dumped by their partner) often receive breadcrumbs from their ex-partner.

They receive messages such as, “I miss you, I hope you don’t hate me, I will always love you…” But such messages aren’t always as transparent as they appear. They tend to have a deeper, more cryptic meaning.

Although it’s possible that dumpers (those who do the dumping) genuinely miss their exes, it’s highly likely that they regret their poor actions even more.

They hate how they behaved after the breakup, so they reach out in order to evoke some kind of reaction from their ex.

If they get a heartbroken, forgiving reaction, they increase their karma and feel better about their image. They’re able to move on in peace.

And if they get a nasty reaction, they tend to get negatively empowered, frustrated, or enraged—and no longer regret their actions. Their dumpee helps them get rid of guilt.

There are also some dumpees who intentionally try to make their dumper ex feel guilty. They do this by begging and pleading, professing their feelings, apologizing, and accusing.

But guilt, unfortunately, isn’t dumpees’ ally as it doesn’t work the way dumpees think it does. It works counterintuitively as it tends to repel dumpers who no longer care about their dumpees.

Conversely, it may sometimes work on dumpers who still possess some romantic feelings toward their exes. But such dumpers tend to leave the moment they’ve dealt with guilt

Guilt, unfortunately, is a horrible feeling—and those who care about their image don’t like to feel it. They want to get rid of it as quickly as possible.

That’s why the guy saying he thinks about you may be trying to get rid of guilt so that he can enjoy his life with a clean conscience.

He’s been thinking about the good times with you

If it’s been a while since you and the guy in question spoke and he tells you he thinks about you, he likely feels nostalgic about you.

He probably remembers the quality time he spent with you—and as a result, values and respects you as a person.

That’s why a confession from a guy such as, “I’ve been thinking about you a lot” usually means one thing. It implies that he likes you as a person and that he wants to continue to get to know you.

It’s definitely a good sign.

However, if the guy never stopped talking to you and he confesses to you all of a sudden, he’s probably expressing his feelings to you and wants to see how you’ll react.

If you reciprocate his feelings, he’ll probably use the opportunity to take your relationship to the next stage.

He’ll plan more 1-on-1 activities with you and date you.

When a guy says he loves you but you’re not dating

Some insecure guys spill their hearts out to the girl they like out of fear that the girl will find and date someone else and abandon them.

What such guys need to realize is that they’re being needy. They’re trying to charge into a relationship just to secure their spot and extort the girl’s love.

And that’s something girls don’t like. They want to know they have romantic feelings for the person prior to committing to him. They have respect for themselves.

So if you’re not dating but a guy tells you he loves you, my advice is to reassure him that there’s no need to rush. Tell him you’d like to get to know him before you make any rash decisions.

How to respond when a guy says he’s been thinking about you?

If you recently hung out with a guy and he says he’s been thinking about you a lot, he most likely has a crush on you.

He’s indirectly telling you how he feels about you because wants to know if you feel the same way about him.

If you do, let him know you’ve been thinking about him too and that you enjoy his company.

And if you don’t, you may want to let him down gently and tell him that you see yourself being good friends with him.

Basically, see if he’ll settle for friendship.

Do you now know what it means when a guy says he thinks about you? Did you find your answer? If you did, post your realization below the post.

6 thoughts on “What Does It Mean When A Guy Says He Thinks About You?”

  1. I get told “I think about you” all the time. We’re 6 months into a texting on a dating app and he still won’t share his phone number. Does this mean I should walk away?

    Reply
  2. Hi Linda
    Would you accept my advice
    (What if) Means that you are afraid of losing him
    Be confident and kill your fear
    And then you will see, he will text because your self respect reached him

    Reply
    • Thank you Asma,

      Thank you for your comment.
      I’m in NC from July but still struggling with my situation of breakup. But your comment it’s so important, brave one and true. I hope that I’m conveying this message by staying in NC
      Best,
      L

      Reply
  3. Well thank you Zan for this new article! It’s great one as always. From the moment I entered to the NC phase one of my problem was ‘what if he don’t know how to start conversation with me again’? ‘What if he is to afraid that I lost all the respect for him?’ What do you think Zan?

    Stay safe and thank you again :))
    Linda

    Reply
    • Hi Linda.

      As Asmaa says, if your ex respects you and wants to text you, he will do so no matter what. He will overcome his fears and doubts and reach out to converse with you.

      Stay strong!
      Zan

      Reply

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