What Does It Mean If He Can Go A Day Without Talking To You?

If you’re dating, have dated, or want to date a guy who can go a day without talking to you, you need to know that the guy lacks relationship knowledge and self-awareness, doesn’t have his priorities straight, hasn’t developed feelings for you, has fears or an avoidant attachment style, or can’t handle stress and arguments very well.

Something’s not quite right about him because he’s putting himself or others before you and doesn’t know or care that he’s confusing or hurting you. All he knows is that he must do what feels right to him and that talking to you every day isn’t necessary. He thinks it’s unnecessary because it drains his energy and wastes the time he could be spending doing “more productive” things.

A guy like this doesn’t know how relationships work. He doesn’t understand that relationships require daily communication and bonding and that sometimes couples need to do things they don’t feel like doing. We could say that the guy has developed a lazy mentality and now lacks the willpower to invest his time and feelings into the relationship. He’d rather not give his time to you because he thinks other things or people are more important than you.

If you’re not yet in a relationship and you don’t know each other that well, not speaking for a day can be considered normal. But if you’ve already gone on a few dates (or more) and the guy is taking it slow, he could be playing mind games with you. Many guys (and women) hide their feelings because they don’t want to show too much interest and affection too soon.

They think (or rather fear) that if they come on too strong that they could overwhelm the other person and make him or her lose interest. But normally, this doesn’t happen. When two people like each other, pulling away is completely unnecessary. It causes unnecessary uncertainty and wastes time they could be spending getting to know each other and moving forward with their relationship.

So if a guy you like can go a day without talking to you, judge his behavior on how long you’ve known him and the relationship you have with him. If you’re in a romantic relationship, for example, his behavior obviously isn’t very good. Guys who need so much time to themselves in a relationship likely have unresolved childhood issues, trust issues, or perhaps even feelings for ex-partners they haven’t worked through yet.

Whether it’s their mentality, the way they give and perceive love, or emotional unavailability, something’s causing them to find joy in solitude rather than with you. This raises a huge red flag as guys who are ready for a relationship don’t act that way. They a)want to impress you and b)fear losing you. They don’t talk to you just when it’s convenient for them and string you along.

Instead, they adjust their lives in a way that gives them time to talk to you for at least a few minutes every day. If they can’t speak even for a minute a day (which is 1/1440th), the very least they should do is message you.

Most couples these days have devices to communicate over distance. They just have to make a little bit of time for each other and explain why they’ve been busy recently. Mind you that friends and hobbies aren’t valid reasons. They’re excuses people use when they don’t want to spend time with you.

So don’t just think about whether the guy likes you or loves you but also if he has what it takes to reach your expectations and meet your emotional needs. Every couple should be willing to compromise and sacrifice time. In all honesty, they shouldn’t even have to sacrifice anything. If they like each other, the desire to spend time with each other should come naturally to them.

However, if a guy you like doesn’t know you on an intimate level, then it may still be too soon to talk with him daily. The guy probably doesn’t feel connected with you (yet) or is just playing push-pull games. Sooner than later, you’ll find out what his intentions are.

This post will answer the question, “What does it mean if he can go a day without talking to you?”

What does it mean if he can go a day without talking to you?

If the guy in question is your boyfriend and he can go a day without talking to you, this certainly isn’t a good sign. It means that the guy’s needs and relationship expectations are different from yours and that if you don’t soon reach a compromise, someone could feel pressured and fall out of love.

That someone will likely be your boyfriend because he doesn’t like being told he’s being neglectful. In his mind, he thinks he’s doing fine (probably his best), so he perceives your cries for help as criticism and nagging and controlling behavior. Most guys feel attacked because they don’t see things from their partner’s perspective and understand how their emotional partner feels.

Instead of sympathizing with her, they get annoyed with her and make her feel even less understood and supported. This creates even more space and tension between them and eventually (if nothing is done about it) causes a breakup.

You see, couples can survive lots of problems and incompatibilities if they want to, but when they have different emotional needs and don’t want to do anything about them, they often break up.

They just don’t find common ground fast enough because they think the other person should be more understanding and do most of the work. But that’s not how relationships work. In relationships, couples need to work together. They need to be open to healthy suggestions and not take things personally. It’s through open-mindedness and maturity that they can talk about things that bother them and do something to fix them.

So if your boyfriend can go days without talking to you, keep in mind that your boyfriend may not be developed or emotionally ready for a relationship with you. He may need more time to process something painful that has happened to him recently (breakup, divorce, losing a family member) before he can return to you.

It’s impossible for me to say what’s happening to him without seeing the big picture, but keep in mind that guys who pull away for days are usually up to no good. They often become cold and distant because they’re doing other things and dating other people. Such guys are known as orbiters and come back only if something goes horribly wrong in their dating lives and they need a shoulder to lean on.

Here are 7 reasons why a guy can go a day or days without talking to you.

You must also understand that guys in general aren’t as clingy or relationship-focused as women. Women tend to desire close connections whereas confident guys are more goal-oriented. I know this is a bit stereotypical, but it’s true. Guys (and women) who feel secure and happy with themselves usually don’t seek a lot of affection and attention from their partners.

They don’t need to because they’re perfectly happy on their own.

Anxious, depressed, unhappy, and controlling guys, on the other hand, aren’t that secure. They feel unhappy with themselves, so they try to be happy by focusing on external happiness – on things others can do for them.

This is why they exhaust the person they’re with and put their relationship to the test.

What do I do if my boyfriend can go days without talking to me?

If your boyfriend can go days without messaging or calling you, your relationship is in jeopardy. This is because couples who don’t communicate frequently usually take each other for granted and lose the connection they have with each other. They fall out of love (and when they do), start desiring other hobbies and people.

To avoid this, you and your boyfriend will have to find a way to communicate again. You’ll have to talk about his lack of interest and effort and figure out why he doesn’t like talking to you much. If the guy understands his behavior, he’ll tell you why and make it possible for the two of you to make plans on how to both get what you need from each other.

But if he has no clue as to what’s making him the way he is and he isn’t interested in learning more about it, then this relationship probably isn’t worth saving. It may be better to break up because a guy who doesn’t care that he’s neglecting and damaging the relationship won’t change his ways no matter how kindly you ask him to.

He won’t see a reason to change because he’ll feel too comfortable with the way things are. You need to think about whether you want to stay in a relationship like that. Think long and hard because if you stay, you’ll put the guy in complete control of the relationship and wait for him to slowly lose interest.

I’m not saying he’ll lose it for sure, but chances are that he will because he’s closed-minded and incapable of reflecting on his shortcomings and growing with you.

I suggest you give him a chance and talk to him about his lack of effort only if he takes you seriously, values your opinion, and wants to do something about it. Such a guy may be able to adjust and improve and become the person who’s not just good for you but also good for the relationship.

You need to convey to him that his changes won’t just give you what you need to be happy but that they’ll also improve the quality of the relationship and the way he feels about you.

So show him that you’re not criticizing him by saying, “I know this might not be easy to hear, but it’s been on my mind for a while now. I’ve noticed that you’ve been busy recently and haven’t been calling/texting me much. I just wanted to see if you’re doing okay and if there’s something you wanted to share with me.”

If your boyfriend tells you why he hasn’t been talking to you much and has a good reason for doing so, sympathize with him and offer him support. Ask him if you can help.

But if he says he’s been busy with friends, work, and various problems, say that you’re happy he has an active lifestyle and that you do too, but that you’re in a relationship and that relationships come with certain responsibilities you’d like him to communicate about.

That’s what couples who care about each other do. And he needs to do that too if he wants to stay in love with you.

He might not like words like “responsibility” and seeing that you’d prefer him to be more involved in your life, but you’re not happy with his behavior either and shouldn’t just hold things inside. You’re his girlfriend, so he must show interest in your feelings, cravings, and expectations.

Guys who don’t care about women’s feelings aren’t relationship material. They haven’t developed the self-awareness necessary to reflect on their issues and improve the things their relationships require them to improve.

So if your boyfriend agrees that he hasn’t been giving you what you wanted recently, say that you’re happy he agrees and that you’ll both work on relationship matters together.

You’ll be patient, expect your boyfriend to fail or regress at times, and lower your expectations a bit whereas your boyfriend will work on discovering why he doesn’t want to communicate every day and improve his desire to communicate with you.

The goal for him should be to learn how to deal with smothering thoughts and emotions and enjoy spending time with you.

Do you consider it a warning sign when a guy goes a day (or days) without talking to you? Have you encountered a guy like that and tried making things work with him? Post your experiences with the guy below the post.

However, if you’re looking for relationship help and wish to talk to us about it, click here to learn more about our services.

Zan

My name is Zan and I’m the founder of Magnet of Success. I enjoy writing realistic relationship and breakup articles and helping readers heal and grow. With more than 5 years of experience in the self-improvement, relationship, and breakup sphere, my goal is to provide advice that fosters positivity and success and avoids preventable mistakes and pain. Buy me a coffee, learn more about me, or get in touch today.