Does I Wish You The Best Mean Goodbye?

Does I wish you the best mean goodbye

In a breakup, I wish you the best is another way of saying, “Our relationship has come to an end. We’re done, but I still care about you as a person and want the best for you. I may or may not talk to you, so find your own way of dealing with the breakup and keeping yourself busy.”

An ex who wishes you the best after the breakup is trying to appear polite. Rationally, he or she wants the best for you, but emotionally, he or she feels tired and determined. The dumper wants to distance himself from you and focus on his own wants and needs.

So yes, I wish you the best from an ex means goodbye. It means that the dumper has lost feelings and that he has no intention of regaining them and working on the relationship. It makes more sense to him to let the relationship go and get ready for a new relationship with someone else.

The dumper could choose a different way of parting ways, but the “I wish you the best” goodbye is impersonal and fits the hopeless situation much better. It reaffirms the dumper’s commitment to leave the relationship and stay away from the dumpee for his or her safety and well-being.

Dumpers tend to say this type of goodbye to exes they perceive negatively and don’t care much about. Even though they try to make it seem like they care, they emotionally want to keep their distance and do things that make them happy.

The only reason they say “I wish you the best” is to give the impression that they care and minimize the weight of their actions. They don’t want their ex to think they don’t care because that could make their ex feel even more sad or angry.

It could put them in a situation where they must deal with their ex’s emotions on top of theirs, and in turn, overwhelm them and stop them from feeling relieved and elated. 

Dumpers don’t want to deal with strong emotions. They want and expect their ex to accept the breakup and not give them a hard time about it.

If their ex resists the breakup, begs and pleads, cries, or does anything that puts pressure on them, they feel stuck in the past and struggle to focus on the present and future.

The dumper would rather avoid dealing with unwanted emotions caused by their ex. If there’s a chance that he or she can avoid complications by wishing the dumpee the best, you can be certain the dumper will take that chance. He or she will tell the dumpee things the dumpee wants to hear and be done with it.

This is one of the politest ways the dumper can shoo the dumpee away without hurting his or her feelings.

So keep in mind that lines like, “I wish you the best, I want you to be happy, take care of yourself,” are polite ways of showing respect and consoling the dumpee. They’re means of telling the dumpee that there’s no hope for getting back together and that the dumpee must stay away from the dumper and find other ways to cope with the breakup.

Sadly, they’re not the most empathetic goodbyes. Dumpers who truly care about their ex tell their ex to reach out if he or she is struggling with the breakup. They offer support and do everything they can to minimize pain and suffering.

Those who just want to get rid of their ex either do so by ignoring their ex or politely or impolitely telling their ex to leave them alone. Some dumpers get angry and force their ex to stay away whereas others choose polite approaches and ask their ex to stay away.

Both types of dumpers want space and zero communication. If they don’t get what they want, they typically react in ways that hurt their ex and make them look mean.

In today’s post, we talk about why “I wish you the best” means goodbye and share how you should respond to it.

Does I wish you the best mean goodbye

Why does I wish you the best mean goodbye?

I wish you the best is something dumpers say when they’re certain about breaking up. They say it when they’re exhausted from the relationship and don’t want to invest any more time and energy into their ex. 

If they wanted to invest in their ex (get back together or stay friends), they wouldn’t wish their ex the best. They’d choose different parting words and continue to stay in touch. Communication would continue as before and would show that nothing has changed between them. 

So bear in mind that “I wish you the best” usually means “Take care, but I’m out of here.” It’s a way for dumpers to politely but permanently remove their moral obligations and separate from their ex. They don’t want to think about their ex and worry about how their ex feels.

All they want is to leave the past behind and look forward to their new life. Their new life feels liberating and empowering to them, so they hope things stay the way they are.

The reason why “I wish you the best” means goodbye is that it contains no desire or plans to change the dynamics of the relationship. The dumper is perfectly happy with his or her newfound freedom and wants to remain in control of the breakup.

Now that the breakup happened, he or she can decide what to do with all his or her free time. The dumpee doesn’t have a say in it. If the dumper wants to go out to drink and party, the dumper can do that. And if the dumper wants to meet other people and start a new relationship with someone else, he or she can do that too.

The dumper can do anything that seems right and feels right. The breakup gives him or her the power, right, and freedom to make any decision as long as that decision doesn’t hurt the dumpee and hinder him or her from self-prioritizing.

If your ex or someone you dated rejected you and wished you goodbye, you need to understand that this person changed his or her opinion of you. The man or woman thinks that a romantic relationship with you stops him or her from reaching relationship and personal goals and that the only way to be happy is to let you down gently and physically and emotionally disconnect.

A complete separation will allow the dumper to avoid feeling guilty and pressured by your expectations and feelings.

Don’t think that “I wish you the best” means something like “I want us to be together in the future.” Dumpers don’t think about giving their ex another chance in the future. They may say they’ll think about it a few months later, but they seldom do. 

They usually don’t find the drive to reconnect because they don’t process the breakup and become regretful. To become regretful, they must first find a reason to regret leaving their ex. They must get hurt or experience some kind of problem they need their ex for.

I’m talking about a problem bigger than they can handle as a big problem can incentivize them to think about their ex and cause them to redevelop feelings. A simple promise to give the relationship another chance after a few months can’t do that.

It can’t return their feelings and show them they need their ex.

Only something painful can do that. Something that takes them by surprise and shows them they can’t move forward without their ex. Dumpers must learn the hard way that they need their ex to be happy and that they still love their ex.

With that said, here’s why I wish you the best means goodbye. 

Why does I wish you the best mean goodbye

A “wish you the best” goodbye from an ex can be sincere or insincere. If it’s sincere, the dumper wants to help you feel better because he or she genuinely cares about you and wants you to be happy. The dumper hopes that you move on from the breakup quickly and find eternal peace.

If the goodbye is insincere/conditional, on the other hand, the dumper wants to help you only because doing so helps him or her relieve guilt. He or she cares about your well-being because your pain and unhappiness affect his or her conscience and mood.

You can tell your ex is trying to help you because it’s the right thing to do if he or she insists on supporting you for as long as it takes. A sincere dumper will be selfless as he or she will put your pain above his or her relief and joy.

An insincere dumper, on the other hand, won’t, An insincere dumper will only say the right things and be surface-level friendly. He or she won’t do anything to help you now and long term.

What to say to someone who wishes you the best?

Whether the person cutting you off is sincere or insincere, you should let him or her exit your life. You should wish him or her the best back and let him or her be free. There’s no point in begging for him or her to think things through and stay in your life.

It’s meaningless to further degrade yourself for someone who has given up on working as a couple and decided to walk away. You should never force yourself in someone’s life when that person emotionally detached, left, and made you fend for yourself.

Instead of begging for another chance or taking it personally and getting angry and vengeful, remember that this person didn’t see the same value in the relationship as you and that it’s not your fault.

It’s your ex’s fault for thinking negative thoughts and not doing anything to prevent negative emotions from growing and destroying the relationship.

I don’t know the issues that caused the breakup, but the issues probably didn’t get resolved in time. Over time, they snowballed into bigger problems that weighed the relationship down and broke your ex’s resolve.

Whatever the reason for breaking up is, “I wish you the best” is just one of many ways dumpers leave their dumpee ex to his or her devices.

Sometimes they also say things like:

  • take care
  • good luck
  • see you around
  • I know you’ll be okay
  • if you need anything, let me know
  • don’t be a stranger
  • feel free to reach out
  • let me know if you want to be friends

These parting methods may differ, but they all mean the same thing. They all indicate that the breakup is permanent and that you need to accept it and start moving on. The sooner you do that, the less pressured the dumper will feel and the quicker you’ll recover mentally and emotionally.

Figure out what helps you stay busy. If sports keep your mind off your ex and the things he or she has told you during or after the breakup, focus on sports. Do what it takes to keep your brain engaged and your mind off your ex.

Eventually, you’ll detach from your ex and stop deciphering your ex’s words and actions. You’ll realize that your life comes first and that there’s no point in analyzing your ex. When that happens, you’ll feel relieved and regain control of your life.

You’ll feel so empowered that your ex’s abandonment won’t bother you anymore. If you work on yourself and find someone else, you might even thank your ex for leaving you and forcing you to improve your life.

Perhaps it’s too early for you to see how you could benefit from the breakup, but give it some time. Identify your flaws and actively work on them. If you do this properly and long enough, you’ll outgrow your ex in many ways and have better relationships because of it.

Are you still wondering, “Does I wish you the best mean goodbye?” What else do you think it could mean? Share your opinion in the comments area below and we’ll get back to you shortly.

And if your situation is different and would like our take on it, check out our coaching services and get in touch.

6 thoughts on “Does I Wish You The Best Mean Goodbye?”

  1. I had exactly those words “ I think you’re a great person, I wish you the very best but I prefer to be left alone” (it was an option I gave him or I asked if we could speak) .. and following this – I went into no contact ..

    When I broke no contact – a year on.. it was to seek closure and I didn’t realise he had moved on just weeks after.. I said goodbye .. and wished HIM the best as my ex told me he had a child

    If an ex has wished you goodbye.. why do they reach out? -why tell me about another ex? Why?

    1. Hi Ana.

      He wanted to update you on his life and perhaps even alleviate his conscience. He had no intention of getting back together. It was a breadcrumb.

      Best,
      Zan

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