Best Last Words To Say To An Ex

Have you ever wondered how to part ways with an ex in a way that makes you look mature and leave the best impression on your ex? I know I have. I wanted to know if my last words could make my ex think about our last interaction and make her feel good about it.

I wasn’t the only one, though. During my breakup and my career as a breakup analyst, I’ve come across many dumpees who searched for the best last words to say to an ex. Some thought their last words should be about making their ex jealous and anxious whereas others thought they should be about closure, healing, and letting go.

People are different in a myriad of ways, but if your intention is to hurt your ex, that obviously isn’t the best thing to do. Hurting your ex on purpose and not speaking to your ex afterward will ruin any respect your ex has for you and force your ex to stay away from you.

It will make the breakup more difficult than it has to be as it will drive a wedge between you and your ex.

That’s why it may be better to avoid saying anything mean and confusing that could show your dark and vengeful nature. Instead of getting back at your ex, try to remain in control of your emotions and avoid hurting or reasoning with your ex (explaining your intentions were good and that you hoped your ex would notice your changes).

Such explanations won’t impress your ex because your ex won’t be receptive to them. He or she will have a completely different mindset and be in a different emotional state.

So what are the best last words to say to an ex? Speaking from experience, the best last words are brief and friendly. They should be said during the closure talk or soon after if your ex still speaks to you and respects you.

And they should be parting and include a conclusion to the relationship. This means you should try to end things with your ex permanently by displaying an eagerness to cut your ex off (politely of course) and move on.

In this post, we talk about the best last words to say to an ex.

The worst last words to say to an ex

Before we talk about the best last words to say to an ex, we need to talk about the worst words. Many people think it’s the other way around (that the worst words are the best), so they listen to their hearts (which is the biggest mistake they can make) and profess their feelings.

Normally, they say things they hear in the movies—and by doing so, offend, smother, or bother their ex. That’s how they quickly decrease their ex’s respect and interest in them and make the last words not only ineffective but also counterproductive.

Dumpees need to be careful about the things they say. They need to keep in mind that their words can make their ex feel uncomfortable and pity them rather than respect them and want to be with them. Pity creates guilt and guilt doesn’t impress an ex who left them.

It makes them want to stay away from their ex and mind their own business.

With that said, the worst last words you can say to an ex as a dumpee are:

• I’ll be waiting for you
• I can feel this isn’t the end
• I love you too much to let you go
• I’ll do anything you want me to do
• I don’t want you to date anyone
• You’re the best boyfriend/girlfriend I ever dated
• I don’t know how to live without you
• I’m so depressed and miserable
• I don’t want to lose you
• I never liked you anyway
• I’ll find someone else
• I wish we’d never met
• Don’t forget about me, please
• Do you still love me?
• Love can conquer anything
• I know we can work on this
• You have the wrong impression of me
• One day, you’ll be sorry
• Goodbye doesn’t have to be forever
• I know that someday we’ll be together again
• Contact me if you change your mind

These words don’t make dumpers feel respected and loved. They make them feel overprioritized, disrespected, trapped, and uncomfortable. Always remember that dumpers aren’t receptive to emotional styles of expression and that every time you express pain and sadness, they feel guilt-tripped and want to run away.

Therefore, you won’t make them love you and want to be with you if you tell them your expectations and read them cheesy love/destiny quotes. What you will do instead is show them you’re in denial and that you lack the ability and willpower to let go and heal from the breakup.

Dumpers leave relationships because they can’t invest time and reciprocate love-like emotions. The very thought of staying in a romantic relationship with the person they lost feelings for chokes them and tells them that the only way to be happy is to avoid feeling overwhelmed by their ex.

So when they do their best to keep their emotions under control and their ex says something like, “I think about you and miss you,” the emotions they’ve been trying to avoid the most quickly come rushing back. They put immense pressure on dumpers and force them to respond in line with their values, beliefs, and emotional patterns.

Impatient, impulsive, and immoral dumpers usually say something rude or ignore their ex whereas mature dumpers try to calm their ex down and encourage their ex to be strong.

Dumpers need to put themselves in their ex’s shoes and think before they respond to their ex. They need to keep in mind that their ex is suffering and that they shouldn’t make their ex feel unworthy of their love and attention.

Here are some things you shouldn’t say to an ex as a dumper:

• I hope you find someone who loves you the way you want to be loved
• I hope you’ve learned some valuable lessons
• It was all your fault
• I need to find myself
• I’m not ready for a relationship right now
• I just want to be alone
• Someone will love you more than I could
• Maybe we’ll get back together in the future
• You’re too boring/needy/different/difficult for me
• We have nothing in common
• It’s not you, it’s me
• I still love you
• I love you but I’m not in love with you
• You’ll be in my heart forever
• We met at different stages of life
• We grew apart, I don’t feel the connection between us anymore
• We can still be friends

Here’s how dumpers and dumpees should handle the breakup.

This is the shortened, idealistic example of a relationship closure conversation. Most breakup talks are much more emotional and longer because couples are affected deeply by the breakup. But despite that, couples must try to collect their thoughts and respond rationally, showed in the infographic above.

The more rational their responses are, the higher the likelihood that they’ll make each other feel positive emotions and respond positively.

The last words to an ex need to be positive for two reasons:

1. The dumpee is hurt and already blames himself or herself for breaking up. A healthy interaction with an ex allows the dumpee to lose hope at a healthy pace and promotes healing.
2. The dumper is displeased with the dumpee and can’t handle more negativity. He or she also needs to recover emotionally, only in different ways. Negative interactions hurt the dumper and may bring a negative reaction out of him or her.

If you want to say some last words to your ex, say them in a manner that heals the hurt within and enables growth. Do it out of respect for yourself, your ex, and all the people involved.

Best last words to say to an ex

Now that you know that the last words need to be selected carefully, let’s talk about what they can be. Generally speaking, they can be anything that shows high self-esteem, self-respect, an understanding of breakups, and a desire to move on.

That being said, here are some of the best last words to say to an ex-girlfriend or ex-boyfriend.

The dumper needs to be mindful of the dumpee’s health whereas the dumpee must show that he or she will be okay with or without the dumper. The dumpee can do that by exuding confidence, using humor, or revealing plans and goals that take priority over the broken relationship.

The dumper can joke too, of course, but only if the dumpee is in a joking/sarcastic mood. As a dumper, it’s usually safer to be serious, empathetic, and supportive. You can always decrease the intensity when you see the dumpee calm down and accept the situation.

Bear in mind that there is no such thing as the best last words to say to an ex. There are only words that show an understanding of what the person you’re breaking up with or getting dumped by is going through.

If you understand what thoughts and emotions you and your ex are experiencing and what words to use and avoid, you’ll hurt each other less and give each other a decent chance to recover in ways you need to.

So forget about saying the best last words to your ex and instead say what your ex needs to hear to feel calm and respect you and what you need to respect yourself. If you do that, you’ll know you did the right thing and that you can focus on yourself.

If you got dumped, you’ll understand you handled the breakup maturely and that you presented yourself in the most attractive light. And if you did the dumping yourself, you’ll know that you said encouraging things and that you can move on with a clear conscience.

It’s a win-win regardless of whether you want your ex back or not. You can’t go wrong by being a strong/good human being.

Did you find the best last words to say to an ex? Can you think of any other confident, yet mature words to say to an ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend? Post them in the comments below.

And lastly, if you’re looking for breakup coaching, click here to sign up for a session.

Zan

My name is Zan and I’m the founder of Magnet of Success. I enjoy writing realistic relationship and breakup articles and helping readers heal and grow. With more than 5 years of experience in the self-improvement, relationship, and breakup sphere, my goal is to provide advice that fosters positivity and success and avoids preventable mistakes and pain. Learn more about me or get in touch today.