If you’re thinking of attracting a man of high value into your life—and not just someone who leaves the moment the love butterflies wear off, listen intently.
You can attract the man you like as long as the man is open-minded and is on the same wavelength as you.
He has to be receptive to you and the energy you exude otherwise he won’t be able to capture your inner and outer beauty.
He just won’t be emotionally ready for your words and actions to reach him. It’s impossible.
So don’t think that you can attract a person whenever and wherever you want to because there are two essentials that form a romantic relationship.
One is your wants and needs (the wish to bond) and the other is the guy’s emotional and rational zeal.
You need to understand that sometimes people just aren’t ready to give and receive love and that there’s nothing you can do about that.
You can only “hope” that they overcome their difficulties in life and open up to new possibilities in the future.
People who aren’t ready to commit are typically the people who are:
- broken-hearted or recently divorced
- attracted to someone else or the opposite gender
- ruled by poor thinking patterns and different expectations
But as long as people are ready to love, you have nothing to worry about because attraction is universal.
Every human being values, respects, and craves the same core personality traits and characteristics in others.
And that’s because we all want emotionally fulfilling relationships.
Although our taste in romantic partners varies for each of us, we are biologically wired to chase after the following types of attraction:
- emotional
- physical
- sexual
- intellectual
When we feel pulled toward a person for any of the above reasons, we feel that we have chemistry with that person.
We feel connected on a deeper level far beyond our ability to express it—and consequently, crave more attention from that person.
So if you want to get closer to the man you like, focus on the above-mentioned types of attraction.
Put your effort into bettering yourself—and the man you’re trying to entice will naturally want to get to know you better.
And that’s because you’ll give him what every person wants — happiness.
Just be prepared to dig deep and work hard on the shortcomings that are in your power to improve.
This article will teach you how to attract a man with the most powerful law on the planet.
The law of attraction.
1)Show a genuine interest
Men love girls with a good attention span. They especially love girls if they care about their hobbies and interests and are willing to listen to them without interfering.
If a girl is a good listener, she indirectly tells a guy that she genuinely cares about what he has to say and that she enjoys his company.
She also tells him that she respects his opinion and that she wants to get to know him better.
And that’s something guys value more than anything.
They truly appreciate a girl who gives him the time to express himself openly.
As a matter of fact, they love it some much they feel as if she’s one of the few women who actually understand him.
Talk to someone about themselves and they’ll listen for hours.
dale carnegie, how to win friends and influence people
When a girl listens, the guy interprets the girl’s high levels of interest in a mutually understanding way and grows fond of her.
And if she encourages him to voice his opinion on top of that, the guy soon starts feeling valued and understood.
It’s that simple, yet so many girls try to talk their way into a relationship with a guy.
As a girl, you need to understand that emotionally mature men are rational beings who select their words carefully. They prefer to verbalize their thoughts and emotions when they have an opportunity to do so because it adds significance to their words.
Just like women, it’s in their nature to express themselves and feel a sense of belonging.
The only difference for men is that they tend to be more reserved.
So if you’re wondering, “How to attract a man of high value,” give him your undivided attention and encourage him to express himself.
You don’t need to prove to him that you’re a good conversationalist.
He probably already knows that and respects you for it.
What he actually wants from you is something way more important than being good with words.
He wants you to show a genuine interest in him and ask him lots of questions about his interests and life goals.
If you do this and he’s the right person for you, you will see sparkles of enthusiasm in his eyes.
2)Be happy and enjoy your time with him
I can’t stress enough the importance of being around a happy person.
There is nothing more important for guys than spending their free time with calm, collected people.
They absolutely love a cheerful atmosphere where they can just lay back and have fun with their favorite people.
It’s how they recover their enthusiasm and recharge their energy. ?
Emotionally-demanding situations, on the other hand, are the worst. There’s nothing guys hate more than seeing a woman’s strong negative reaction.
It just doesn’t flow with their cool, rational side.
That’s why they expect girls to be more like them—more calm and non-emotional.
Girls, on the other hand, want exactly the opposite. They want guys to be more caring, expressive, and understanding of their emotions.
So if you want to attract a man, show him that you understand his need for peace and quiet.
Be conscious of your actions just like he is and show him your rational side.
He’ll adore you for it.
Here’s how you attract a man with the law of attraction.
If you’re attracting a man into your life, it’s very important that you give happiness to him before you attempt to take it.
You need to selflessly provide him with positivity, energy, curiosity, and everything you admire in him.
Only then will he notice you and appreciate you for the good traits that you possess.
3)Don’t complain, get angry, or gossip
If there’s anything that puts guys off, it’s when girls show them their nasty attitudes and complain about insignificant things in life.
It oftentimes puts them off so badly that they gravitate toward their ex or someone whose personality they respect more.
Some of the complaints guys hate listening to are:
- I have no time at all
- I have no money
- I’m tired of work
- she keeps annoying me and talking behind my back
- nothing nice ever happens to me
I can tell you that you’ll never attract a man into your life if you complain about how difficult your life is.
At least not a high-quality one.
Keep in mind that the man you’re trying to attract right now has enough problems of his own already and doesn’t want to listen to yours as well.
If you don’t keep your problems to yourself, he’ll probably ditch you and find a million excuses not to talk to you.
It’s just too exhausting to listen to a complaining person rant about unimportant matters.
Ask any guy.
When you complain, you make yourself a victim.
Eckhart Tolle
We all make poor choices in life every now and then—and we all encounter various difficulties that we could use help with.
But asking other people (especially acquaintances) to spend their time and energy on our own issues is very wrong.
If our issues can be resolved, there’s absolutely no need to mix random people in our own problems and make things more difficult than they need to be.
We can just take care of our problems ourselves. It’s our life—and we’re equipped with abilities to do so.
And if we can’t correct them, then it’s best for ourselves and everyone else’s sake that we accept the consequences and learn from our troubles/mistakes.
Doing this requires strength, of course. But just because it’s difficult, doesn’t mean that we should burden others.
You see, guys are fixers by nature. And when you complain about unimportant things, they will almost always offer solutions.
Yes, they will extend a hand and help you out.
But if your problems keep on coming day after day and you don’t do anything about them, most guys will eventually get overwhelmed.
Not only that.
They will start to hate the fact that you can’t deal with your problems on your own and that you don’t listen to the suggestions they’ve been offering to you.
As a result, they will give up on you or never open up to you and the positives of personality.
So if you want to make a good impression on a guy and be the person who makes him happy, show him what you’re like on a day-to-day basis.
Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not. Just stick to giving him the best you’ve got—and gradually (if you haven’t already) develop yourself into a loving person.
By doing so, you will consistently show him who you are and what you bring to the table.
Remember that consistency is key. ?
4)Be visually attractive
Guys are visual creatures.
Before they get to know a woman and appreciate her for the person she is, they look at her physical attributes and judge her based on the way she looks.
They scan the woman with their eyes because they want to form a visual opinion of her and subconsciously determine whether the woman is desirable or not.
If she is, the guys’ first impression is generally good and leaves them wanting more. And if she doesn’t attract them, well… they don’t get too excited about her and lower their expectations.
The thing is that natural beauty isn’t the only thing guys appreciate in a woman. They also like the way she dresses, the amount of makeup she uses, and the kind of shoes she wears.
The reason for that is that the way a woman dresses and carries herself is a reflection of her character.
Her style depicts her characteristics and says a lot about her self-esteem and the way she likes to appear to others.
When a woman intentionally aspires to appear desirable, her behavior indicates that she cares about her image and that she respects herself.
And the same goes for a healthy body.
If a woman does her best to eat healthily and exercises regularly, she immediately proves to the world that she cares about her health and the way others perceive her.
Her body basically speaks for itself as it tells others that her eating and exercising habits are healthy.
And this is very, very attractive to the guys because they adore a woman who works on her physique.
They adore her not just because she looks good but also because she’s hardworking.
It’s in our human DNA to appreciate everything that’s difficult to achieve. And this goes for both genders.
So if you’re thinking to yourself, “How to attract a man of high value into my life,” make sure you do the physical work on yourself.
Hit the gym, update your wardrobe, and show the man that you feel comfortable in your own skin.
I’m just a stranger on the internet, but take my word that every guy appreciates a girl who looks and feels good in her own skin.
5)Have confidence
Confidence is the most attractive trait any person can have. Confidence tells people what we feel about ourselves and consequently, how we expect others to treat us.
So if you want to appear attractive to the man you’re trying to attract, make sure you feel attractive yourself.
It’s incredibly important that you show the man you like that you feel comfortable being who you are.
If you fail at something so simple, this man will quickly discover your insecurities and weaknesses and subconsciously realize that you’re a threat to yourself.
And when he identifies you as a threat to yourself, he’ll know you’ll be a threat to him too.
Provided he’s been with other women before, this man will automatically predict your insecure demons to plague his relationship with you.
He’ll expect you to be jealous of the people he talks to and perhaps even interpret your personality as needy and demanding.
Besides pride, loyalty, discipline, heart, and mind, confidence is the key to all the locks.
Joe Paterno
So if you’re going to attract a man of high value (an alpha), make sure that you attract him with your good qualities and not your bad ones.
Show him that you’re perfectly capable of taking care of yourself and that he would be just an addition to your life.
Don’t tell him that verbally, of course, but do try to relax and act selflessly around him.
6)Be smart
The 6th way to attract a man on this list is intelligence.
If you’re attracting a man of high value, make sure you show him how emotionally and mentally intelligent you are.
Tell him about the books you read, the music you enjoy, and most importantly, the passion you live for.
Men absolutely love passionate women who know what they want in life.
They find it attractive because they find them strong and independent—and capable of supporting them as well.
So show the man you like your enthusiasm outside of the romantic relationship and he will absolutely revere you for your ambition.
He will love you head to toe because high-quality men don’t want to be a priority in the relationship.
They like having a woman in their life who supports and encourages them along their way.
A good, self-sufficient woman gives them the strength to continue on their journey.
And when their partner needs help with her struggles, they like to feel important and support her back.
By doing so, they play their role as a male in the relationship and continue to give their woman what she needs the most.
Emotional support.
They love doing this as long as the girl they date has real, legitimate concerns and worries.
Gossips, spending too much money, and everyday complaints aren’t real worries to guys.
They are complaints.
7)Flirt
If you want to attract a man into your life, combine the 6 previous points and flirt with him.
Don’t lose your dignity and go all out. of course, but do tease him a bit and give him a few subtle signs that you find him attractive.
If you flirt in a clever way, he will think about your intentions for a very, very long time.
And in your absence, his attraction for you will grow.
You can flirt with a guy by:
- smiling with your eyes
- holding eye contact
- touching him gently
- teasing him verbally
- showing that you’re comfortable around him
Depending on how he reacts to flirting, you’ll quickly realize whether he enjoys it, doesn’t like it or if he’s just shy about it.
For example, if his feet are pointed toward you, he leans toward you, and reciprocates your words and actions—then chances are that he’s into you.
He’ll tell you everything he feels about you with his body language, so be observant and confident about it.
Keep in mind that although he’s a guy, he can still feel a bit embarrassed about your approach.
As a matter of fact, he’ll probably be nervous, so flirt slowly until you receive positive feedback in return.
8)Don’t be desperate and ask for a commitment
Once you actually start dating the guy you like and go on a few dates with him, whatever you do, don’t attempt to lock him down and ask for a commitment.
Guys absolutely hate desperate girls who are so insecure that they can’t live comfortably on their own without external validation.
As a matter of fact, mature guys find it so repulsive that they don’t want to risk attaching themselves to someone who limits their freedom.
They just want to run away from such girls because they don’t want the girls to suck the life force out of them.
Nothing makes them raise a red flag and lose interest in girls faster than when girls show insecurities before they even get to know men.
You see, when you act on desperation, you put high expectations on man and force him to make a swift decision.
You demand from him to give you that which you crave (not want) and make him doubt his love for you.
And as you likely know, doubt is one of the worst feelings a man can have in a relationship (and prior to one) as it drains him of his interest and energy.
It does this very quickly and leaves both parties discontent. Especially the person who’s about to get discarded.
So if you’re dating a man and you want to attract him even more, don’t act on your weaknesses and force him to commit to you.
Chances are that it’s too early for that because the guy is still in the early stages of developing romantic feelings for you.
He just doesn’t want to be rushed to make a decision that he could regret in the near future.
That’s why you mustn’t ask him, “What are we now” because he’ll probably say “single.”
Especially if you’d only been on two or three dates and his feelings for you are still vague.
Are you working on attracting a man of high value into your life? How are you doing that? Comment below and share your thoughts with others.
I didn’t realize you had replied. I was so delighted to find it today!😃 What you shared was really helpful Zan! Thank You!🙏🏻😇🌟
I do have more questions now, if you would be so kind, please…
My personal nature is incredibly loving, caring, and giving. I have a very generous nature as well. When I am lined up inside, all of that flows abundantly. It flows freely. I love that feeling!!! 🌟🌈💖
Zan, I would very much appreciate your thoughts and insight on… How I can best be true to my/that nature and also not inadvertently over-give to a man??? Help please…
My heart can feel so free and abundant, that it can feel like maybe I have to close down that flow, to a slow trickle in to modulate for a man. It hurts to construct an inner dam to hold back my loving. That feels painful to me. There has got to be a better way for both of us? Could you maybe help me with this, by offering me a reframe of this or maybe a workaround of some kind, please?
I certainly don’t ever want to smother someone.😞That would be awful too, for both him and I.
How much loving, giving, caring is… too much, too little, or just right for a man??? How can I tell?🙃
Without relying on a man to verbally share, how can I best tell, how I am sharing/loving/caring is too much or too little, or just right for him?? That would be super helpful to know, so I could modulate more effectively, and certainly before hitting any extremes. Unfortunately that’s where I have been lately and didn’t realize it.
Zan, I super appreciate your insight about not putting a man on a pedestal, as well. I think I am guilty of that too. Lol. Somehow I came to believe that looking up to a man, was how to best express the depth of my loving, caring, for the man, I deeply respect and admire and choose to partner with.
I have held the idea that I would treat the Man I most respect, Love and admire, as the King of his castle. (Our home. And I would be the very well loved, respected and cared for Queen, of our castle.)
What I understood in what you shared, this perspective of mine, is in fact NOT what works for men. Yikes! Wow! 😯 I super appreciate the clarity on that big-time! I soooooo want to understand and be able to do/offer what genuinely works best!!! Would you help me here too please?
Is there a reframe or image you could offer me instead, of what life with a/your partner would look & feel like to you, as a deeply satisfied Man?
I appreciate your perspective and insights Zan! Whatever you can share here too, will be deeply appreciated as well! Thank you!!!💕🙏🏻😇🌟
Hi Christina.
To remain true to your character and have guys respect you at the same time, you have to set some relationship boundaries early on. When you meet a guy, you need to show him that you like him, but also that you value yourself enough not to let him take your kindness for granted. It’s really just about sticking to your word and taking action when someone crosses the line.
If you meet an understanding guy, know that you won’t have to do a whole lot to prove your worth. The guy will know that you’re a good person and won’t take advantage of it even if he could.
You don’t need to hold back your love too much, but you must increase your self-esteem and hobbies/passion in life. These things will let guys see that you’re a busy woman who’ll be okay with or without a male company. So live your life for yourself. Your next boyfriend has to be an addition to your life and not your sole purpose for living.
When you’re satisfied with yourself, Christina, you won’t have to hold back on love. You’ll give guys what you give them—and won’t worry about whether you overinvest in them. It seems to me that you’ve got certain fears right now and are overthinking things because of them.
Best regards,
Zan
Thank you Zan! What you shared is very helpful to me! 🌟🌟🌟🙏🏻😇
Indeed, I’ve been super overthinking! I was trying to understand what occurred and even originally prompted changes in relationship dynamics, with a man that I deeply care for, but whom was not being forthcoming or direct in his communication. It is amazing how much time one can lose thinking about such things and considering unknown possibilities. It can be like falling into a tunnel. Overthinking is the opposite of helpful in my experience. Even knowing that, sometimes I still inadvertently fall into it. Thank you for pointing it out. It is helpful to me!
Thank you for all you shared with me! You have given me insight and a healthy refocus and I deeply appreciate that!!!💕
Time for me to stop mentallizing (if that’s a word, lol) about this relationship juncture I am experiencing. A happy life doesn’t happen that way.
It is time for me to shift gears into supporting myself by engaging physical activities that nurture and enliven my well-being. It is time to engage my life energy into activities that leave me feeling satisfied and bring me joy.
Above all, it is time for this one to become fulfilled from the inside-out, rather than inadvertently and perpetually looking for true fulfillment outside myself. Perspective is everything!
Thank you Zan! I deeply appreciate your help! Despite still having some challenged ego feelings, in the center of myself I feel positive and optimistic for my life, and my journey ahead. I believe the best is yet to come! 😊🎉
Zan, Thank you for helping me find my way! 💕🙏🏻😇🌟
Hi Christina.
Maintain this positive attitude and you’ll soon deal with the bruised ego and develop yourself into an even more positive person. You’ll also stop analyzing things so much and become ready to attract people who are similar to you. Just give yourself time to get through this difficult time, Christina—and you’ll see that an exciting future lies ahead of you.
Best regards,
Zan
Zan, your insight, support, and encouragement are so helpful! They are blessings to me and to all! Thank you! Know that you are deeply appreciated! 🙏🏻💕😇
First, I just found your site today and have been reading away all afternoon. Fantastic insightful articles, so thorough and thoughtful! Thank you!!!
Second, please help…
I felt deeply surprised and taken aback when I read, “…high-quality men don’t want to be a priority in the relationship.”
My jaw is still dropped on that one line. Help please. Is there another article on your blog that explains this more? Or could you share more here, about how a man experiences this in the positive way and the negative, as well as his thoughts and feelings about it, please?
I am so intensely curious to hear/read what you have to say on this. Please share more…
I feel like maybe I’ve been doing the opposite with Men, with the best of intentions of course. Now I am thinking perhaps I’ve been way off and not known it. 🙃
Any clarity you could offer would be super appreciated. 🙏🏻
Additional thoughts…
I thought a man would always want/desire/prefer to be a woman’s heartfelt priority.
I thought it was a/the way to show a man my deepest respect, love and care. Help?!?!
I also thought of it as an aspect of the display amongst the interplay of feminine and masculine energies/polarities (beyond/distinct from gender).
I’ve always also thought/regarded it as a way to honor a man, as well as his feelings/experience of dominance, as I choose to gift him with acts/energetics of my own softness, vulnerability, and submission.
In case it helps, the section quoted below is where I found the original quote that stunned me. Again, any additional clarification and perspective you could offer would be immensely appreciated!!! Thank you!!! 💕🙏🏻😇
“So show the man you like your enthusiasm outside of the romantic relationship and he will absolutely revere you for your ambition.
He will love you head to toe because high-quality men don’t want to be a priority in the relationship.
They like having a woman in their life who supports and encourages them along their way.“
Hi Christina.
Thanks for reading the blog.
I would be happy to explain why men don’t want to be a priority in the relationship. What men want is to be cared for, respected, and supported. They want a woman who is committed to them but also committed to living her life and being independent.
This doesn’t mean that you must treat them badly or care about yourself way more than them. All it means is that you don’t make your whole life about the person you’re with and instead have your own hobbies, friends, and even priorities. A guy will respect you a lot more if you have things going on in your life. Seeing that you’re busy will make him want your attention more than if he sees that you’re clingy and desperate for attention.
A man likes to be spoiled occasionally but you shouldn’t do that all the time. If you always shower him with gifts and attention, you’ll put him on a pedestal for no reason – he won’t have earned it and will instead likely take you for granted.
I hope this clarifies things, Christina. Let me know if you have any other questions.
Kind regards,
Zan