When A Man Constantly Says I Love You

There are 5 types of men who constantly say “I love you.”

1)There are guys who aren’t in a relationship with you, but love bomb you as if they were to make you feel good and get you to lower your defenses. Such guys are impatient and usually have ulterior motives. Most of the time, they want you sexually.

2)There are guys who express gratitude multiple times a day to remind you how much you mean to them.

3)There are guys who just got into a relationship with you and feel so overjoyed at the new relationship that they constantly tell you they love you. Guys like this are empowered with love hormones and want you to know how they feel because everything is new and exciting to them.

4)There are guys who get through the infatuation phase with you (4 months or so into the relationship), but still constantly tell you they love you. Such guys can be classified as clingy as they rely on you for emotional support and validation and need you to be happy.

5)And there are dumpers who tell you “I love you” to give you false hope and reassurance—and dumpees who say they love you because they’re hurt and desperate and want you to love them again.

In this article, we’ll focus on the 4th type – the kind of guys who have been with you for months or years and still constantly tell you they love you in a very emotional manner.

Why does he say I love you all the time?

When a man in a long-term relationship (6 months +) constantly says “I love you,” his intentions are very straightforward. He wants you to feel how much he loves you so that you can reciprocate his feelings and make him feel good back.

A guy who does this has a lot of love for you. But his continuous acts of love don’t come from a calm, selfless place. They come from a place of attachment, expectation, fear, and mild anxiety.

That’s why we can say that a man who constantly confesses his feelings is committed to you and greatly in love with you. He probably doesn’t even realize why he loves you so much. He doesn’t understand that he needs you more than you need him because he’s anxious, unconfident, depressed, or scared of losing you.

For some deep-rooted reason that he hasn’t discovered and fixed yet, the guy needs you so he can feel loved and fulfilled. And he’s probably going to keep wanting you to fulfill him by telling him you love him until he’s:

• developed confidence and self-esteem
• met some new people
• gotten busy with life
• improved his emotional health
• and realized his unhealthy/smothering behavioral patterns and did something to break them

There are many possible explanations as to why he says he loves you all the time, but the most common explanation you need to be aware of (not take advantage of) is that the guy has low self-esteem and feels anxious. He’s struggling emotionally and wants you to show him you care about him.

Maybe your boyfriend is going through a challenging time and needs a shoulder to lean on. Or maybe he’s having a hard time loving and accepting himself, so he’s giving you love with the intention to receive love and acceptance—and feel at peace.

Whatever internal issue he’s dealing with, make sure not to reject his love and call him out for it. Doing that will hurt him very badly because deep inside, he’s in panic mode, expecting you to support him.

Having said that, here are 6 reasons why your boyfriend says I love you all the time.

You mustn’t take offense at your boyfriend’s personal difficulties because everyone has problems. The guy in question just doesn’t have the strength or the skills to handle them at this moment. He’s way too hurt, emotionally drained, and unprepared to handle them the way you and I handle them.

So even though the guy’s behavior seems “a bit over the top,” remember that he needs your love and support now more than ever. He doesn’t need your reassurance when everything’s fine and dandy. He needs it now that he’s barely holding on.

You’re his girlfriend, so try to understand where his “I love yous” really come from so that you don’t misperceive them and feel suffocated by them.

Examples of when your boyfriend loves you too much

Here are a few things your boyfriend could say when he loves you too much for his own good:

• I love you so, so, so much.
• I don’t want to lose you. I don’t know what I’d do if I did.
• You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.
• Please don’t ever leave me.
• Thank you so much for being here and loving me. I really appreciate you.
• I don’t know how I’d manage without you.

If your boyfriend says he loves you too often, he usually doesn’t just tell you he loves you a lot.

More often than not, he shows you he appreciates you by:

• Planning one on one time with you
• Buying you gifts
• Taking you out a lot
• Preparing your meals
• Doing chores
• Taking care of your tasks and responsibilities
• Getting upset when you’re going out with friends
• Preventing you from talking to others

A man who constantly says he loves you oftentimes has an inactive social life outside of the relationship. He doesn’t like spending a lot of time away from you because not being with you gives him anxiety.

The relationship means the world to him and is his only ambition because it boosts his self-esteem, confidence, and emotional health and gives him what he needs to feel secure.

Due to his low self-esteem and things going on in his life, a guy who loves you a lot is overprotective and afraid that you’ll choose another guy over him. That’s why he closely monitors things and people that threaten his position in the relationship.

What to do when he keeps saying “I love you” all the time?

A lot of emotionally healthy men and women don’t understand mental health. They don’t know what it feels like to feel hopeless and desperate, so they tend to get impatient with their struggling partner, lose respect, and react badly to him or her.

Normally, they say or do something that hurts their partner and makes him or her even more dependent on them.

That’s why you need to be extremely cautious when you’re dealing with a boyfriend who constantly says I love you. He may be a guy, but you still need to treat him with care and admiration. Just as he needs to make a few internal changes to stand on his own two feet, you must develop patience, understanding, and awareness of your thoughts and emotions.

You must push away anger, frustration, impatience, and thoughts that lower your respect for your partner because such things will kill your love for your boyfriend faster than you can say “whoops!”

Once you’ve become self-aware and started to accept your partner’s excessive need to be loved caused by emotional struggles, insecurities, or something unknown to you, your next step should be to communicate with your boyfriend. Tell him that you’re not trying to hurt him but that you’re conscious of how often he tells you he loves you.

Say that you love him a lot too and that you appreciate him expressing his feelings, but that your emotional needs are different from his—and that you’d like to understand why.

If you already know why they’re different, proceed by offering him help and reassuring him you feel the same way about him. He has to know you’re on his side. And if you have no clue why he’s telling you he loves you so many times a day, ask him if he’s been feeling well recently.

Hopefully, your boyfriend will tell you what’s been affecting him recently and why he’s been clinging to you so much.

If you talk to him, the two of you should be able to figure out where his incessant need for recognition comes from. It can come from his childhood, a recently failed relationship, or some other defining moment in his life.

If you can’t figure out the source of your boyfriend’s anxiety no matter how hard you try, then perhaps an hour or two of counseling might help.

He can get counseling on his own or with you, it doesn’t matter. But no matter what he does, improving internally takes time, so it’s best that he gets his emotions under control as quickly as possible. The sooner he gets help and/or does something about it, the less damage the relationship will take.

What to say when he says I love you all the time?

Now you know what to do when your boyfriend constantly says “I love you.” But how do you reply to that when you feel smothered with love?

My advice is to not get upset just because you can’t reach your boyfriend’s expectations. He may want more from you now that he’s having difficulties, but that doesn’t mean that he’ll stay that way forever. If he works on himself, he’ll eventually overcome his issues and return to normal.

So dismiss any unhealthy thoughts and feelings from his persona and think of his “I love yous” as a slightly different, yet normal way of him expressing love for you.

Don’t think that he’s weak, clingy, needy, beta, or anything degrading that comes to your mind. Simply think of him as an ordinary guy who’s going through a difficult time and respond to him with love and compassion.

You may not feel as emotional as he does, but don’t forget that he wouldn’t either if he was emotionally healthy, confident, or completely independent. He would be similar to you.

So don’t think much of it and say, “I love you too/more/so much” and see if you can feel as vulnerable as he does. You might not be able to—and that’s okay. Just give him the verbal reassurance he’s looking for and think of him the way you always did.

When he addresses his fears, insecurities, or (childhood) issues from the past, he’ll return to his usual self. But until then, support him selflessly the same way you would want him to support you if the roles were reversed.

What if he’s fine and suddenly says I love you for no reason?

If he’s not stressed, doesn’t have any unresolved issues, and his behavior is new to you, then it’s possible that the guy is acting out of character because he’s cheating or in love with someone else. He may be trying to appear natural by overinvesting in the relationship and lowering any reservations you may have for him.

It’s a very common cheating behavior cheaters exhibit when they feel guilty about their actions. They basically try to hide their immoral behavior so badly that they pretend to be their usual selves and appear unnatural in the process.

Some of the things a cheater could do out of fear are:

• calling you cute nicknames all of a sudden
• telling you he loves you a lot
• asking you how you feel
• talking about the future (kids, marriage, vacations)
• and fantasizing about a perfect life

These are very common signs that something’s wrong and that your boyfriend is thinking about leaving. Maybe he didn’t cheat, but it’s possible that he’s lost feelings for you, feels bad, and is trying to feel something for you again.

Some people promise their partners the world and leave the next day.

So if you suspect that your boyfriend is telling you he loves you a lot for no apparent reason, bear in mind that he’s probably up to no good. He’s probably trying to cover up his behavior by showing you a side of him you haven’t seen since he first fell in love with you.

My advice is to ask him why he’s being so fidgety around you all of a sudden. In a joking manner, ask him if he has something to hide and watch his reaction. A guy who’s scared of accidentally revealing his darkest secret will crack under the pressure and look like a completely different person.

For him not to appear anxious, he would have to not care at all.

Did you learn what it means when a man constantly says I love you? Let me know what you think by posting your comment below.

Also, if you’re looking for private relationship/breakup coaching, see how you can do that here.

Zan

My name is Zan and I’m the founder of Magnet of Success. I enjoy writing realistic relationship and breakup articles and helping readers heal and grow. With more than 5 years of experience in the self-improvement, relationship, and breakup sphere, my goal is to provide advice that fosters positivity and success and avoids preventable mistakes and pain. Buy me a coffee, learn more about me, or get in touch today.