Why Do I Keep Seeing My Ex-Boyfriend’s Name Everywhere?

Many dumpees keep seeing their ex-boyfriend’s name everywhere they go. They see their ex in movies, books, songs, dreams, hobbies, favorite food, places they visited with their ex, and in anything that reminds them of their ex.

They’re addicted to their ex, so they think about their ex day and night and see him with eyes open or closed.

This is because they’ve anchored strong emotions to being with their ex. They’ve put their ex deep into their subconscious minds and became dependent on the emotions created by positive memories.

Now that their ex is gone though, they can no longer experience those emotions. They feel a void in their chests, so they wish to refill that void and once again feel loved and respected.

Something called the reticular activating system (RAS) – a bundle of nerves in the brain is responsible for making dumpees feel that way as one of its functions is to make dumpees aware of any significant changes in their lives.

This includes changes such as people and things quickly becoming a part of their lives or conversely, suddenly disappearing. In breakups, RAS essentially enables people to feel a sense of loss and a strong desire for things to go back to the way they were.

It’s not just girls who experience the effects of RAS. Guys also keep seeing their ex-girlfriend more often than they’d like. Just like girls, they also suffer from a lack of love hormones and strongly hope for their ex to validate them and make them whole again.

Seeing an ex everywhere after the breakup is not a gender thing or some kind of disorder, but rather an attachment matter. The more attached a person is to his ex, the more he desires his ex and the life he had prior to the breakup.

This is true even if the relationship wasn’t very healthy and rewarding.

So if you’re asking yourself, “Why do I keep seeing my ex-boyfriend’s name everywhere,” be mindful of the fact that your ex’s departure has triggered your fears and anxiety.

It’s caused you pain like never before and obsessed you with a strong desire to feel validated.

Why do I keep seeing my ex-boyfriend’s name everywhere?

First of all, seeing your ex-boyfriend’s name everywhere is not an illness. It’s the result of getting your heart broken against your will—and something that, unfortunately, befalls many dumpees.

Especially those who get dumped for the first time and/or those who haven’t yet developed the skills and self-esteem to deal with the difficulties behind the breakup.

Moreover, those who don’t get closure also tend to see their ex-boyfriend’s name. And that’s because they don’t receive the answers they desperately need to ease their worries.

As a result, they have no choice but to analyze the breakup and look for answers on their own.

So if you’re wondering why you keep seeing your ex-boyfriend’s name everywhere, the simplest explanation is that you’re extremely hurt by the breakup. You’re being haunted by regrets, doubts, fears, and traumas and wish that you could feel better – the way you used to when you were with your ex.

Because your brain is aware of this, it’s sensing that your ex’s absence is a big threat to your well-being, so it’s constantly reminding you to do something about it.

It’s telling you to reconnect with your ex and be happy.

Unfortunately, though, your brain doesn’t know that obsessing about your ex and getting back with your ex isn’t the only way for you to be happy.

All your brain knows is that:

• it’s the fastest way
• that it’s used to receiving happy hormones on a daily basis
• and that it needs to acquire those hormones in order to be satisfied again

To put it simply, your anxious brain doesn’t care how you handle the breakup pain as long as you hurry up and do something about it. That’s why it’s instinctively telling you to take the shortcut – which is to skip the personal improvement work and reunite with your ex.

When you see signs of your ex everywhere, the message is very clear.

You’re having a difficult time letting your ex go and adjusting to a life without your ex in it. You still value your ex (possibly above yourself), which means that you’re far from ready to forget about your ex and be your usual self.

You haven’t gone through all the 5 stages of a breakup for the dumpee yet, so you need more time (and possibly put in more effort) before you can detach and prioritize your self-care.

How much time you need depends on your coping mechanism. But if you try your hardest to avoid checking up on your ex online and stick to all the rules of no contact, you should stop seeing your ex’s name everywhere a few months after the breakup.

You won’t even know that your ex has left your system. One day, you’ll just suddenly remember that you haven’t thought about your ex in a while and that you’ve finally overcome your worst obsession.

That being said here are 5 reasons why you keep seeing your ex-boyfriend’s name everywhere.

If you’re seeing your ex’s name all the time, bear in mind that most dumpees obsess about their ex for a while. They do it unknowingly because they crave love and recognition and think that the only way to be happy again is to get back with their ex.

If you’re one of those dumpees, you need to know that reconciliation (the shortest route) isn’t always the best route. When there’s cheating, lying, manipulating, or gaslighting involved, the best route is the one that allows you to distance yourself from your ex and helps you pull your wandering mind back into the present.

Only by focusing on yourself can you guarantee that you’ll find happiness within yourself.

Seeing his name everywhere doesn’t have anything to do with the law of attraction

If you’re seeing your ex’s name everywhere, this isn’t a sign from the universe about your ex coming back. It’s a sign that you’re hurt and that your ex’s recognition means more to you than anything else.

Dumpees who interpret their wish to bond as a sign from the universe almost always stay emotionally hooked on their ex. They don’t realize that they’re looking for supernatural explanations for their feelings because they have nothing tangible to work with.

So adopt a healthier mindset. One that allows you to stop looking for explanations externally and makes you look internally.

Right now, your hurt feelings are the main reason why you probably feel that your ex will return. That’s why the sooner you stop your emotions from affecting your thoughts, the sooner you’ll make the necessary emotional progress needed to stop thinking about your ex.

Also, don’t be hesitant about seeking professional help. Even though you can probably heal on your own, a professional can still help you a lot.

He or she can speed up your recovery, help you address some of your deep-rooted issues, and point you in the right direction.

Depending on where you live, therapy could be a bit on the expensive side. But the results it can accomplish are worth more than anything physical you’re saving up for.

It’s up to you if you want to get professional help. But if you don’t want it, at least make sure not to believe the law of attraction gurus, spells to get your ex back, text your ex-back techniques, or 15, 30, 60-day no contact rules.

The people on the internet have created many techniques and rules to serve their selfish purpose.

So always trust your common sense and a general belief that if something sounds too good to be true, it’s because it probably is.

What do I do if I keep seeing my ex-boyfriend’s name everywhere?

Most of the time, putting an end to an ex-obsession is a matter of time and determination. The less you focus on your ex, the quicker you’ll stop seeing your ex’s name everywhere.

But what if you’re already focusing on yourself and you still see your ex-boyfriend’s name all the time?

In that case, your wounds are still fresh, and you need to stop opening them with thoughts like “I miss my ex, I’ll always love him, I’ll never stop thinking about him.”

You need to brush off such thoughts whenever they occur by remembering that it’s okay to experience them, but that it’s not okay to let them grow and control you.

You need to become aware of them, okay with them, calm yourself down (do self-affirmation exercises), and repeat this process over and over again.

I say “over and over again” because you won’t succeed on your first try. Heck, you won’t succeed even on your hundredth try.

If your ex cheated on you or hurt you by any means, it will probably take you thousands, tens of thousands, or maybe even hundreds of thousands of tries before you finally pull it off.

The breakup is the biggest and most painful lesson of your life. So naturally, it requires a lot of trial and error.

And that’s okay. It doesn’t matter how long it takes. All that matters is that you keep fighting and learning because sooner than later, you’ll shift from seeing your ex-boyfriend’s name to seeing yours.

And that’s when you’ll notice you’ve become stronger and that you’ll never allow yourself to suffer this much ever again.

Affirmations for seeing your ex-boyfriend’s name everywhere you

I have a feeling that most dumpees don’t know how to fight their internal battles when it comes to their unwanted ex-thoughts. They don’t know if they should get angry, cry, or try to ignore them.

That’s why I’ve created a list of affirmations you can use to dismiss your ex-thoughts whenever they unexpectedly pop up on your mind.

This article is written for women, but if you’re a guy, these positive affirmations should work for you too.

Here are 10 things you can speak out loudly, whisper, or think to better deal with your intrusive thoughts.

• It’s okay if I think about you. You’ve been a part of my life for a long time, and now it’s time to let you go.
• I can feel myself detaching and moving on already.
• The breakup is getting much easier every day. I can feel it.
• I’m a strong person with a bright future.
• I’m proud of myself for getting this far.
• The breakup happened so I can fall in love with myself again.
• It’s only a matter of time before I stop seeing your name everywhere.
• Thank you for the lessons you’ve thought me. I’m going to better myself and apply them to my next relationship.
• It’s difficult not to think about you, but that’s exactly why I have to try my best. I need to regain my happiness and independence.
• If it weren’t for the breakup, I wouldn’t get the chance to improve myself and become the person I want to be. So thank you for that.

These affirmations may feel useless if your breakup just occurred, but don’t underestimate the power of your mind. Continuous reinforcing (positive thinking) will slowly but surely allow you to come to terms with the breakup and help you leave the past behind.

It will give your life joy and meaning.

Just don’t forget to put your emotions into your affirmations. Feel yourself accepting the outcome, detaching from your ex, becoming happy, regaining your identity, and most of all, growing your strength and independence.

Affirmations don’t work for some people because some people only do half the work. They only think of them but forget to put emotions into them and believe that they’re true.

So to stop asking yourself, “Why do I keep seeing my ex-boyfriend’s name everywhere, practice affirmations daily. Practice them fervently when you’re having a hard time with the breakup and also when you’re home alone with nothing better to do.

Sooner rather than later, you’ll upgrade your belief system and come to the realization that your ex is a matter of the past. A past that has hurt you and made you into a stronger and better individual.

Are you still wondering, “Why do I keep seeing my ex-boyfriend’s name everywhere?” Let me know what the healing journey has been like for you by commenting below.

Or if you prefer to go in-depth and talk 1-on-1, click here to see our coaching plans.

Zan

My name is Zan and I’m the founder of Magnet of Success. I enjoy writing realistic relationship and breakup articles and helping readers heal and grow. With more than 5 years of experience in the self-improvement, relationship, and breakup sphere, my goal is to provide advice that fosters positivity and success and avoids preventable mistakes and pain. Buy me a coffee, learn more about me, or get in touch today.