Many exes block after the breakup. They don’t like how their ex’s actions or presence make them feel, so they block to 1)prevent their ex from triggering unwanted emotions and 2)regain control of their life. Dumpees want control by showing their ex they’re disappointed or hurt by his or her decisions or behavior and that they don’t need their ex to be happy.
Dumpers, on the other hand, block their ex on everything to also stop their ex from knowing what they’re up to and/or reaching out. Their ex smothers them, so they don’t want to think about their ex and receive criticism. They just want to forget about their ex and focus on things that make them feel good.
Many times, they block their ex on everything without a warning. They do that even though their ex didn’t do anything that threatened their safety or demanded anything from them. Of course, that confuses dumpees and makes them wonder why their ex blocked them randomly after the breakup.
So if your ex blocked you on everything and you’re trying to figure out why, remember that dumpees and dumpers have different reasons for blocking. Dumpees usually block because they don’t want to receive news about their ex if they can’t have their ex. They’re hurt and don’t want to stalk their ex all the time and be reminded of what they lost.
As for dumpers, they feel emotions of power – anger, bitterness, contempt, suffocation, and the desire to be happy and in full control. The quickest way for them to do that and at the same time stop feeling emotions out of their power: guilt, stress, self-doubt, etc. is to push their ex out of sight and focus on things that move their life in a more positive direction.
Things such as friendships, hobbies, work, and goals.
Maybe your ex could have avoided feeling all these unwanted emotions by blocking you on one or two of the platforms, but your ex probably felt overwhelmed at the time and decided to block you on all the sites or apps he or she had you on – even on the ones he or she wasn’t very active. By blocking you everywhere, your ex shut you out entirely and ensured an uninterrupted post-breakup recovery.
If your ex had only partially blocked you, your ex might have felt unsafe, wondering what you might say or do in the future. That’s why complete blocking seemed safer and occurred due to a mixture of fear, anger, and lack of control.
So bear in mind that complete blocking gives your ex power and control. It reassures your ex that you lack the capability to enter your ex’s life and say, demand, or do something he or she doesn’t want. Even if there’s a small chance of you sneaking back into your ex’s life, your ex feels safer knowing you can’t do it.
He or she wants the certainty of you keeping a reasonable distance and proof that the breakup will unfold on his or her terms. Simply put, your ex doesn’t want any more negativity in his or her life and is convinced that the best way to go about it is to block you on everything. For now, your ex can’t handle the thought of you or others questioning his or her decisions, behaviors, and morals.
All your ex wants is to distance him/herself from the breakup drama/pain and wipe the slate clan. Your ex can do that as soon as he or she cuts you off and starts feeling secure and in control. Emotional and physical distance lets your ex be happy and live the life he or she dreamed about before the breakup.
When your ex blocks you on everything, your ex doesn’t have to worry about your wants, needs, and feelings anymore. Your has no idea what you think, feel, and do and can just pretend that everything’s fine—and let you deal with your problems on your own.
Needless to say, a blocking ex, especially one who blocks you on all platforms doesn’t care about you very much. Not only are his or her feelings gone, but the dumper also doesn’t have any sympathy for you. Due to built-up pain and resentment, the dumper considers him/herself the victim and expects things to improve by running away from the problem (you).
If your ex is a dumpee, however, your ex likely views blocking as a way to protect his or her feelings and cope with unmet expectations. Your ex has an all-or-nothing mentality and wants to recover from the breakup without receiving any breadcrumbs and seeing your social media posts.
Your ex knows that the sooner he or she stops information about you from invading his or her mind, the sooner he or she will recover.
In today’s blog post, we discuss why your ex blocked you on everything as a dumpee vs a dumper.
Why did my dumper ex block me on everything?
Your ex blocked you on everything because blocking enabled your ex to quickly feel relieved, calm, and in control. He or she wanted to create some space for some time but couldn’t due to your relationship expectations and his or her romantic obligations. Now that your ex is no longer with you, your ex doesn’t owe you communication, friendship, or affection.
Your ex feels free to do what he or she wants, including blocking you.
If blocking on everything makes your ex feel safe and lets your ex pursue his or her post-breakup goals, your ex doesn’t see a problem with it. Your ex considers the breakup his or her time to self-prioritize and worry about his or her problems and needs. Your problems and feelings no longer concern your ex, which is what he or she showed you by blocking you and cutting you out of his or her life.
Don’t overanalyze your ex’s blocking behavior. Your ex has likely become overwhelmed with negative thoughts and emotions and decided to block you to relieve them. Blocking will let your ex leave the problems in the past and encourage your ex to prioritize people and things that bring joy to his or her life.
You may not want that, but you shouldn’t try to stop your ex from being happy. Remember that your ex blocked you because he or she needs space to breathe and enjoy life. Failure to provide space will make you come across as a desperate ex who doesn’t respect people’s wishes.
If you stayed in touch with your ex, you probably got blocked because you kept making your ex feel pressured. You either pestered your ex with unsolicited texts or calls and tried to get back together or made it seem like you needed your ex to be happy. When your ex could no longer put up with it, he or she stopped caring about you and did what was best for him or her.
Your ex blocked you on everything and hoped that his or her life would improve.
Many dumpers block (partially or fully) when they feel unheard and disrespected. They say or show they don’t want to communicate/get back together, but their ex doesn’t listen. Such dumpers feel they have no choice but to take away their ex’s ability to communicate and be in complete control of the breakup.
If you’re talking to others about your ex (especially in a negative way), your ex may have blocked you out of anger to express disapproval. He or she didn’t see the need to be on good terms when you tried to ruin his or her reputation. Blocking served as a way to seek justice for defamation and perceived improper behavior.
Your ex is essentially avoiding emotional triggers and the responses those triggers could create. By not feeling pressured, stressed, and angry, he or she can live peacefully and joyously on his or her terms. The breakup empowers your ex and makes your ex look forward to new beginnings. It’s not very difficult to be happy.
Most dumpers keep busy by focusing harder on socializing and various distracting activities. Their goal is to avoid thinking about their ex and being forced to do what they don’t want. They want to leave the past in the past and create a life independent of their ex.
Why did my dumpee ex block me on everything?
A dumpee ex typically blocks due to pain, unmet needs and expectations, and broken boundaries. When the dumper won’t leave the dumpee alone and let him or her detach and be happy, the dumpee feels compelled to block the dumper and try to move on without his or her reachouts.
Normally, the dumpee asks for space before he or she blocks the dumper completely.
Those who block right away believe that exes can’t be friends and that they should block their ex right away to preserve their dignity and maximize their self-love. Some exes also block weeks or months after the breakup. They do that when they detach from their ex a bit, rebuild some of their self-esteem, and realize that they don’t need their ex to live a fulfilling life.
That’s when they block their ex to stop checking their ex’s socials and wasting their time waiting for their ex to reach out.
Therefore, your ex may have blocked you due to an argument, frequent stalking, self-protection, detachment, improved self-esteem, or the belief that exes need to block each other.
Having said that, here’s why dumpees and dumpers block each other on everything.
What should I do if my ex blocked me on everything?
If your dumpee ex blocked you on everything, you shouldn’t take it personally. Dumpees tend to be hurt and disappointed and block to protect themselves from obsessive stalking, reaching out, and being reached out to. They know that talking to their ex won’t make their ex’s feelings come back and that they’ll feel better if they don’t interact with their ex and know what their ex is up to.
When it comes to your ex’s blocking, it’s best not to do anything at all. Consider blocking your ex’s way of dealing with unmet emotional needs and expectations. Your ex thinks that the best thing to do now that you’ve fallen out of love is to let you go.
You can’t blame your ex for wanting to process the breakup and move on.
Don’t message your ex’s friends or show up unannounced at your ex’s front door. Instead, remember that your ex doesn’t owe you friendship and that your ex just wants to heal and move on.
You should want that for your ex too. When he or she moves on and looks happy, you’ll have an easier time forgiving yourself for dumping and hurting your ex.
So let your dumpee ex block you if blocking helps your ex feel some sense of control and makes your ex happy. It will ease your guilty conscience when you see that your ex was able to move on and find meaning and joy.
However, if your ex is a dumper, remember that your ex couldn’t handle the stressors associated with you. Whether you reached out or left your ex alone, your ex thought the best thing to do was to block you and disappear. This allowed your ex to completely remove him/herself from your life and feel optimistic.
You should remind yourself that your ex lost feelings and all the care and moral responsibility with it.
The best thing you can do is to let your ex have the space he/she wants and focus on people who want you in their lives. By doing so, you’ll slowly prove you’re not a threat and that your ex may unblock you when he or she becomes curious, nostalgic, or guilty.
For now, let your ex do what he or she wants while you work on changing your perception and attachment to your ex. Once you’ve changed them, you’ll see your ex for the person he or she is and forget about the blocking.
Are you still wondering why your ex blocked you on everything? Why do you think your ex did that? Share your thoughts below.
And if you want our help deciphering the breakup, sign up for breakup coaching. We’ll get to the bottom of your ex’s blocking and devise a breakup plan together.
My name is Zan and I’m the founder of Magnet of Success. I enjoy writing realistic relationship and breakup articles and helping readers heal and grow. With more than 5 years of experience in the self-improvement, relationship, and breakup sphere, my goal is to provide advice that fosters positivity and success and avoids preventable mistakes and pain. Buy me a coffee, learn more about me, or get in touch today.
