Why Does He Keep Blocking And Unblocking Me?

Some guys block and unblock their dumpee ex many times. They’re not happy with keeping their ex blocked or unblocked for too long, so they keep changing their mind and appearing strange and indecisive. They make their ex think they’re having a hard time staying away from their ex and that they may be open to giving the relationship another chance.

Unfortunately, most dumpers don’t block and unblock because they want their ex to notice their behavior and reach out to ask for another chance. Most dumpers do that out of curiosity, guilt, and mood swings. Every time they feel hurt, confused, and/or positive about their ex, they unblock to do the morally right thing and check up on their ex.

If they find what they were looking for or if their ex posts something they don’t like, their unwanted thoughts and difficult feelings swarm their minds, trigger their defense mechanisms, and force them to block their ex. Blocking not only gives them power and control but also prevents them from projecting their discontent, anger, and pain onto their ex.

It stops them from saying something they would regret.

Then why do they unblock later?

They unblock because they process their negative thoughts and feelings and again want to know what their ex is doing. Dumpers get curious about their exes too. They may not be as curious and obsessed as dumpees, but they still stalk their exes on social media and feel informed.

If they don’t like feeling the way they do (let’s say because their ex posts a lot of exciting new things), they get annoyed with their ex and resort to blocking. They don’t want to keep stalking their ex or randomly see updates on their ex. They want updates only when they want them. This could be when they’re sad, nostalgic, guilty, bored, or curious.

They want to feel in charge of the situation and their emotions. If they feel they’re losing control, they could ignore or block their ex and force their ex out of sight and mind.

So if your ex keeps blocking and unblocking you and you don’t know why, bear in mind that your ex doesn’t always think and feel the same. Occasionally, his thoughts and feelings change and tempt him to block and unblock. If he’s in a good mood, he unblocks, and if he’s in a bad mood or receives too much (unwanted) information, he blocks and regains control of his emotions.

Your ex’s mood keeps changing and affecting his blocking and unblocking behavior. As long as he’s doing that, he’s dictating the flow of the breakup and protecting himself from saying things and receiving information. He’s not ready for communication and is comfortable only with limited information.

If you contact him when he unblocks you, he’ll feel pressured and forced to reply to you. He might ignore you and block you again. I don’t know what he’ll do, but his blocking and unblocking pattern shows that he wants space because he hasn’t found a reason to talk to you yet. He still fears communication and closeness and needs to control the situation by keeping you at a distance.

Eventually, he’ll stop blocking and unblocking you. He’ll either keep you blocked or leave you unblocked. This depends on his perception of you and how threatened he feels.

Some exes also block and unblock because they’re playing games with their ex. They don’t want to stay broken up, but they also don’t want to lower their pride and ask for another chance. Such exes block and unblock to hurt their ex and bring a negative reaction out of their ex.

Instead of messaging their ex and apologizing, they act immaturely and fail to learn and grow from the breakup.

Typically, dumpers who love their ex don’t block and unblock. They don’t waste their and their ex’s time because they know they must express their regrets and feelings if they want to make things worse.

Only immature guys block to scare their exes into apologizing and begging them for another chance. Such guys do this blocking and unblocking manipulation technique for a few days before they run back to their ex for validation and love.

Exes who block and unblock weeks or months after the breakup don’t do it for attention. They block because it blocks out unnecessary information. Likewise, they unblock to receive certain information. Information makes them feel good until they receive too much of it or not the kind of information they want.

So if your ex broke up with you more than a few days ago and keeps blocking and unblocking you, know that your ex isn’t playing mind games with you. Your ex is reacting to information and emotions. He’s avoiding uncomfortable feelings and doing what feels good.

If your ex gets frustrated with your social media updates or gets scared of receiving texts from you, your ex blocks you and feels safe. But if your ex suddenly encounters a problem or something that hurts him and makes him want to know how you’re doing, your ex unblocks you and checks your profile. He tries to learn a thing or two about your new life to feel better about his.

I know it’s confusing you and making you wonder if your ex feels regretful and wants you back, but regretful exes don’t block their ex. Not before they try getting back with their ex and get/feel rejected. Regretful exes do the opposite; they unblock their ex, reach out, apologize, and try to meet up with their ex as soon as possible.

They feel that time is running out and that they must reconnect with their ex before it’s too late.

Your ex is likely unblocking to see what you’re doing and how you’re doing. He’s curious about you. But when your ex receives the information he’s after, he stops feeling curious and lacks a good reason to keep you unblocked. He feels happier and safer with blocking you and preventing himself from receiving updates from you.

In today’s article, we talk about the possible reasons why your ex keeps blocking and unblocking you after the breakup. We also discuss what you should do when your ex’s strange (un)blocking behavior affects your healing.

Why does he keep blocking and unblocking me?

The guy keeps blocking and unblocking you for various possible reasons. The most feasible explanation is that he unblocks you when he wants or needs something from you. This could be an update on your post-breakup life, validation, support, or the reassurance that you haven’t forgotten him and moved on with your life.

As soon as he obtains what he’s after, though, he stops seeing the point in keeping you unblocked and blocks you again. By doing so, he stays in his comfort zone and feels at pace. He doesn’t want to give you the wrong idea – that he’s open to conversation and that he wants you to reach out and get back together.

If he was open to talking and getting back together, he wouldn’t have blocked you (again).

He would have avoided doing anything that made him look mean and impulsive. In simple terms, he would have reached out and looked for a way to reconnect emotionally and romantically. Since your ex hasn’t done that, it’s safe to conclude that he doesn’t see your romantic worth and has no desire to be with you.

He’s merely checking up on you and blocking you when he’s done doing that.

It’s not the most common dumper behavior, but it happens from time to time. Some guys don’t know or care that their ex can see their blocking and unblocking. They just want to see what their ex has posted and keep their ex out of their head afterward. They only want to receive updates on their ex’s life when they feel like it.

That’s why they unblock to check up on their ex and block to avoid their intrusive thoughts and unwanted emotions from making their new life difficult.

Guys want to feel powerful and in control of the breakup. They don’t want their ex to dictate what they think and how they feel. They left their ex to avoid such things and feel in charge of their life. If they feel they’re losing control, they block their ex even if they recently unblocked her.

So why does he keep blocking and unblocking you?

Your ex probably has conflicted feelings. On the one hand, he knows that blocking is unfair and disrespectful, but on the other, he feels victimized and wants time to himself. He doesn’t want you to reach out and mess with his newfound space and freedom.

Reaching out would pressure him and trigger his immense need for space. It would anger him and force him to act in ways he doesn’t want to act. He’s basically not ready or developed enough to deal with a situation like that, so he blocks you as soon as he gets what he needs to carry on with his life.

Don’t assume that an ex who unblocks you once or multiple times still has feelings for you. He probably just feels curious and wants to stalk your social profiles until he’s satisfied his curiosity. If he doesn’t have any regrets, feelings, and plans for you, he’ll block you again or keep you unblocked (not reach out).

With that said, here’s why your ex keeps blocking and unblocking you.

If your ex is a dumpee, your ex’s indecisiveness may indicate that your ex doesn’t know what the right thing to do is. He doesn’t know if he should keep you blocked and try to get over you or if it’s better to keep you unblocked and leave the channels of communication open.

Since he can’t decide what’s best for him, he keeps changing his mind and appearing uncertain.

Many dumpees initially block their ex out of anger and pain. They feel hurt and want to protect themselves. They tend to unblock their ex when they realize their ex won’t respect them for blocking (that it could reduce their chances of reconciliation) or when they give up on reattracting their ex.

What should I do about his blocking and unblocking?

If you were dumped, you shouldn’t react to your ex’s peculiar blocking behavior. You shouldn’t break no contact or block your ex out of revenge. If you do that, you’ll reveal that you’re checking up on your ex a lot, that your ex’s behavior is bothering you, and that your ex has power over you.

Instead of responding to your ex, don’t do anything at all. Stay in no contact and show that you’re unaware of what your ex is doing or that it doesn’t bother you.

If your ex is doing it just to manipulate you and make you care, your ex will get scared, crave recognition, and reach out when he realizes you’re not chasing. You won’t have to do anything because your ex will lose the power game and want you back when insecurities and fears of losing you overwhelm your ex.

But if this is a real breakup and your ex isn’t just curious about you, then your ex won’t reach out to get back with you any time soon. He’ll keep checking up on you and might reach out, but it won’t be to secure a spot in your heart.

Whether this is a breakup or a fakeup, you shouldn’t do anything when your ex blocks or unlocks you. You should wait for your ex to process the breakup, find a reason to converse, and ask you to take him back. When that happens, you can take an active approach and see if you can find a way to work together.

If you start anew, you’ll gain a second wind and try to make things work. And if you merely continue the relationship, you’ll soon see that you haven’t made any important changes that would allow you to stay together.

For now, you need to understand it’s your ex’s turn to get back in touch and ask for forgiveness and love. You mustn’t reach out to your ex and try to singlehandedly fix the broken relationship. You won’t be able to fix anything as long as your ex thinks you’re incompatible or unable to fulfill his wants and needs.

So forget about doing something about your ex’s blocking and unblocking. Instead of trying to control the situation, pretend like nothing happened. In terms of reconciliation, nothing did happen. Your ex is no closer to you than he was when he broke up with you.

His unblocking and blocking are just signs that he occasionally thinks and feels differently about you and that he needs more time to stop doing that.

Why do you think your ex keeps blocking and unblocking you? What makes him so capricious? Comment below and let us know.

And as always, if you’re having a hard time reading your ex and knowing what to do, click here to visit our coaching page. There, you can choose the program and the communication method of your preference.

Zan

My name is Zan and I’m the founder of Magnet of Success. I enjoy writing realistic relationship and breakup articles and helping readers heal and grow. With more than 5 years of experience in the self-improvement, relationship, and breakup sphere, my goal is to provide advice that fosters positivity and success and avoids preventable mistakes and pain. Buy me a coffee, learn more about me, or get in touch today.