What Does It Mean When You Dream About Your Ex-boyfriend Kissing You?

If you dreamed about your ex-boyfriend kissing you, you likely want to know what the dream means. Does it mean you’re still in love with your ex-boyfriend, do you secretly want his recognition and care, or do you find your ex attractive and hope he finds you attractive as well?

Before you jump to conclusions, you need to know that ex-boyfriend dreams can have many explanations – not just the most obvious ones that we’ve already mentioned. Sure, if the breakup is fresh, it usually means that you crave your ex’s affection and validation and want him back as soon as possible.

Dreams are often directly linked to our emotional states. If we’re stressed, we tend to dream about the cause of our stress. If we’re extremely excited about something, we tend to dream about that too. Who or what we dream about depends on what we want or don’t want.

But if it’s been months or years and you’re over your ex already – possibly with someone else, then kissing an ex-boyfriend in a dream doesn’t mean that you still love him and feel connected with him. It also doesn’t mean that he’s missing you like crazy and that the universe is trying to bring you two back together.

Sometimes ex-dreams can be completely random. Just how dreaming of kissing a random person in a dream doesn’t imply anything, neither does kissing an ex-boyfriend. All kissing dreams mean is that you remember how you felt when your ex broke your heart and made you anxious and depressed.

You must remember that you felt strong negative emotions such as anxiety, fear, anger, guilt, or remorse and that you’d rather not feel those emotions again or anymore.

So if you’re wondering what it means when you dream about your ex kissing you, know that it means your brain is trying to tell you that it hasn’t forgotten your ex. It still remembers the good and the bad times, but especially the way you felt after the breakup.

In this post, we’ll talk about the things that triggered your ex dreams and what you can do to have fewer of them in the future.

What does it mean when you dream about your ex-boyfriend kissing you?

When you dream about your ex-boyfriend kissing you, hugging you, sleeping with you, and wanting you back, the most reasonable explanation is that you’re still emotionally dependent on your ex and that you want him back. You’re miserable without him, so your brain is showing you how not to be miserable in the quickest way possible.

It’s showing you that your ex is kissing you, which translates into finding you attractive, valuable, and worthy of love. This gives you the emotional fulfillment you need to love yourself and be happy as it empowers you with happy hormones that you badly crave. And that’s why you tend to suffer so much when you wake up.

You come back to reality and realize that you can’t be happy without your ex.

If your ex broke up with you recently, a kissing dream indicates that your ex is still in your subconscious. He’s a big part of your life that you haven’t been able to let go of yet. To let go of him, you need more time to yourself, fewer thoughts about him—but most importantly, less pain, anxiety, or depression.

Unpleasant emotions are preventing you from having pleasant dreams and enjoying your life—and you must do something about them.

You must focus on detaching from your ex because when you detach, you’ll obsess less about your ex and focus more on yourself. And that’s when your dreams about kissing your ex-boyfriend will disappear or decrease significantly. I can’t say what exactly will happen, but you’ll be happier for sure.

One thing you must understand is that negative emotions are much stronger than positive ones. If you’re worried about someone, you’re much more likely to dream about that person than to dream about the luxurious car you’d bought recently.

Pain is much more difficult to process than excitement, hence why you can expect to dream about people who mistreat you, underappreciate you, lie to you, abandon you, and betray you. You trust such people and have expectations of them, so when they fail to reach those expectations, they hurt you and force your brain to tell you to process your hurt in the dream.

Controlling what you dream about when you’re anxious isn’t easy because painful memories force themselves into your subconscious mind and try to resolve themselves. You don’t even have to remember them right before falling asleep because your brain recalls them on its own and looks for solutions to your problems.

I found this explanation on Wikipedia that might put things in perspective.

From an evolutionary standpoint, dreams might simulate and rehearse threatening events that were common in the organism’s ancestral environment, hence increasing a person’s ability to tackle everyday problems and challenges in the present.

If you want to stop dreaming about your ex-boyfriend kissing you when you’re hung up on him, the best way to do that is to find a way to stop being obsessed with him. Accept the breakup, stop checking up on him/asking about him, and keep yourself busy.

These things will help you focus on yourself and allow you to emotionally distance yourself from your ex.

But what if you’re over your ex already and still dream about him kissing you? In that case, there could be other explanations for your ex-dreams. Let’s talk about them in the next chapter.

Why do I dream about my ex-boyfriend kissing me when I’m over him?

If you’re over your ex-boyfriend and you’re wondering what it means if your ex kissed you in a dream, there may not be any explanations for this. It could be completely random as it often happens to dumpees and dumpers who are happily married to someone else. The truth is, we can’t just forget someone we were close with. As long as we remember our ex, we’re capable of dreaming about kissing our ex and doing other romantic and sexual things with him or her.

This doesn’t, however, mean that we have feelings for our ex. It just means that our ex used to be important to us and that we’re randomly recalling the past.

You’re much more likely to dream about kissing your ex when you’re dealing with a lot of stress and anxiety. That’s because unhappiness can cause your brain to look for happiness in the past by showing you memories and people that used to make you happy.

By reminding you of the past, your anxious brain can show you that you were happier in the past (even if this isn’t true) and make you obsess about the person who can give you comfort and support.

Another possible reason you’re dreaming about kissing your ex-boyfriend is that you’re curious about your ex. Maybe he’s with someone else and you’re wondering if he’s happy. Or perhaps you don’t know anything about him and as a result, wonder what he’s up to.

If you’ve spent a lot of time thinking about the guy recently, your dreams likely have something to do with your wish to know more about him. You want to know how your ex is doing, what he’s thinking and feeling about you, and if he’s dating someone new. Such thoughts make you want to converse with your ex or at least find a way to find out more about him.

It’s also possible that you dreamed about your ex-boyfriend kissing you because something reminded you of your ex-boyfriend. Something made you remember him and think about him. And because you weren’t able to stop thinking about your ex, you’d developed a bit of an obsession and obsessed over him in a form of a dream.

This is completely normal and happens to many dumpees (even to nostalgic, regretful, or depressed dumpers). Something like a song, place, or nickname reminds them of their ex and triggers their nostalgic feelings for their ex. That then causes them to think about those feelings and if they’re not happy with their lives, forces them to crave their ex and experience all kinds of dreams.

With that said, here are 6 reasons why you’re dreaming about your ex-boyfriend kissing you

How to stop dreaming about your ex kissing you?

Whenever you have an unwanted ex-dream, remember that the best way to deal with the dream is to not think about it at all. Consider it a meaningless dream that occurred randomly because you used to spend a lot of time with your ex and were very close with him.

If you brush it off as a dream without a meaning, you’ll soon stop thinking about the dream and forget about it in just a few hours. You’ll have better things to think about and will let go of it.

The only way you’ll remember the dream and increase the chances of having similar dreams in the future is if you focus on the dream and look for the meaning behind it. That will likely make you curious about your ex and trap you in the past. It could even create longings for your ex and make you uneasy.

If you’re not over your ex, however, then you don’t need to pretend that the dream is random and that it has nothing to do with your broken heart. You should be honest with yourself instead and admit that you’re dreaming about kissing your ex because you’re broken-hearted and miss your ex.

Doing that will help you accept reality rather than reject it and allow you to begin/continue detaching from your ex.

Don’t get me wrong, it could still take you some time before you stop dreaming about your ex. But if you take this simple advice seriously, you’ll soon stop having these dreams and have more pleasant ones.

Reasons why you should avoid dreaming about kissing your ex-boyfriend

Dreams can be quite dangerous at times. Not only can they hurt you and ruin your mood, but they can also change your perception of the world and confuse you. They can make you believe that something bad is good and that you’re missing out on great experiences.

Experiences that only your ex-boyfriend can make you experience.

So keep in mind that ex-dreams can cause (unhealthy) cravings and that those cravings can revive old (unhealthy) feelings.

They can make people want to go back with their ex because they were emotionally dependent on their ex. Their ex didn’t give them much validation and/or played with their feelings, so they run back to continue proving their worth and seeking approval.

And kissing ex-dreams can help them with that. They encourage them to return to a relationship that was abusive, unhealthy, or not right for them and make them find themselves in similar harmful situations again.

That’s why you need to understand that if you were or still are codependent and desperate for your ex that you mustn’t let your dreams control you. You must control your dreams and refuse to reunite with your ex just because you’re hurting.

It will take some willpower to stay away from your ex-boyfriend after a difficult, hope-giving ex-dream. But if you remind yourself why your relationship ended, you’ll know that the breakup happened for a reason and that it’s given you an opportunity to grow and love yourself.

My advice is to get rid of everything that reminds you of your ex. Get rid of gifts, pictures, letters, your ex’s phone number, and anything that could make you nostalgic. Doing so will feel liberating as you’ll free yourself from an unhealthy/hurtful past and get ready to embrace the present and future.

Did you learn what it means when you dream about your ex-boyfriend kissing you? What do you think it means and that you should do about it? Let me know what you think in the comments section below the post.

And if you want to get in touch with us directly and talk about your ex-dreams or the breakup in general, click here to subscribe to breakup coaching.

Zan

My name is Zan and I’m the founder of Magnet of Success. I enjoy writing realistic relationship and breakup articles and helping readers heal and grow. With more than 5 years of experience in the self-improvement, relationship, and breakup sphere, my goal is to provide advice that fosters positivity and success and avoids preventable mistakes and pain. Buy me a coffee, learn more about me, or get in touch today.