What Is Ghosting On Social Media?

What is ghosting on social media

The definition of ghosting on social media is cutting someone you know out of your life without a warning or explanation. It’s a premeditated act that occurs when people feel trapped in an unwanted situation and think that the only way to be happy and to move forward is to ghost and disappear.

The truth about ghosting though is that ghosting is not morally acceptable. It’s not acceptable even if the person you don’t like is a bit pushy at times, wants too much of your attention, says mean things to you, and makes you look bad.

Ghosting whether it’s in person on or social media is simply inexcusable as it’s one of the worst things you can do to another human being.

The only time it’s okay to ghost someone and block him or her is when your or your loved ones’ health and well-being are in danger. That’s when you should probably involve the authorities and do everything in your power to protect the people you love.

But most of the time, ghosters don’t ghost because their lives are in danger and because ghosting is their only option. They ghost because they’re unethical cowards who would do anything to avoid telling people what they think and how they feel.

They’re afraid of confrontations (as most of us are), but they differ from us because they’re willing to hurt others to get what they want. We could say that they choose the path that gives them the safety, shelter, privacy, and anonymity to get away with an immoral act.

In this post, we’ll talk about ghosting on social media (Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat, Reddit) and give you some tips on how to respond to social media ghosting.

What is ghosting on social media

What is ghosting on social media?

Ghosting on social media is essentially a depiction of people’s character and personality.

It shows what people are capable of as a partner, lover, friend, family member, acquaintance, or as a stranger—and who they are when they’re unhappy with themselves and others.

The reason why ghosting on social media is frowned upon is that most of us just don’t discard others in self-centered, narcissistic ways. Most of us possess at least some levels of dignity, empathy, and understanding for those we care about or don’t care about.

We treat people equally because we possess the ability to tell right from wrong.

That’s why only those who lack empathy, self-awareness, and moral values actually ghost others and hurt them in the process.

They just don’t see anything wrong with ghosting because they’re internally unhappy and think that they have the right to project their unhappiness onto others to exert power and control over them.

So try to look at ghosting in texting as a dishonest act that reflects people’s bad characteristics. We’re talking about the kind of characteristics that come to the surface when people feel angry, sad, depressed, mistreated, victimized, and not in control of their lives.

If you want to know what ghosting on social media is, the following picture will make it easier to comprehend.

What's ghosting on social media

Always remember that ghosting on social media always comes down to people’s integrity. The worse the integrity, the more people find ghosting acceptable, and the less they care about hurting others’ feelings.

What does ghosting on social media do to a person?

When someone ghosts you on social media, that person’s bad behavior immediately makes you look inward and forces you to question your capabilities as a lover, friend, or whatever you were to that person.

The pain essentially tells you that you’re the one who single-handedly ruined the relationship and that your actions have brought ghosting upon yourself.

The truth, though, is that it’s not your fault you got ghosted by someone you cared about. Just how no one asks to get cheated on in a relationship, no one asks to get lied to, manipulated, and ghosted either.

Ghosting after a serious relationship is fortunately completely one-sided and has nothing to do with the victim – the one who gets ghosted. It’s got everything to do with the perpetrator because he or she is the one who makes a conscious decision to carry out an immoral act.

But the aftereffects of ghosting, unfortunately, convince the victim otherwise. They tell the victim that he or she is not worthy of respect (a proper goodbye) and that he or she must now face the consequences of his or her improper behavior.

If not careful, this kind of self-blame can cause the victim to self-reflect to the point of obsession and depression and cause long term-damage.

Generally speaking, the more sensitive and caring the victim is, the bigger the risk that constant self-questioning will hurt the victim and permanently scar him or her.

So make sure not to treat people poorly and leave them abruptly. If you do, you could trap them with their demons and let them interpret your departure in their own self-blaming way.

Why do so many people ghost on social media?

The reason why people ghost on social media is very simple.

People ghost because they have plenty of other people to talk to and bond with—and don’t need nor want people who they can’t benefit from or feel happy with. That’s why they push such people away and focus on those who they already know and have time and patience for.

It’s inconsiderate and mean, but it’s just the way it is.

With the rise of the internet, ghosting on social media has sort of become a norm in our society. People ghost and they don’t even realize or care that they’re ghosting others.

They live in their own little world and due to their carelessness and poor self-awareness, don”t take online relationships and ghosting on social media very seriously.

They only consider them “half-real” or half as important—and as a result, treat them that way too.

Ghosting on social media unfortunately allows immature, underdeveloped people to have the cake and eat it too as it lets them to get away with bad behavior without paying the price.

And ghosters are well aware of that.

They know that they’ll be safe and that there won’t be any physical, real-life consequences for their sins. Most of the time, they don’t even consider ghosting on social media a sin because they think that they’re free to behave as they wish.

They consider the online world different from the real world.

Most social media ghosters have an “It’s not a crime if I don’t get caught” mentality, so they continue to use and abuse the power of the internet to their advantage and play on people’s feelings.

It’s truly a shame that ghosters feel protected by the thought that if the relationship is purely or mainly online (long-distance) that no one can do anything to cause public embarrassment or do something to make them feel uncomfortable.

At last not online.

The victims of ghosting can, of course, share their bad experience with the ghoster on the ghoster’s Facebook or Instagram, but people usually don’t go that far. They don’t find it worth the trouble, so they let the ghoster get away with it.

You should do that too if you ever get ghosted. There’s no point in trying to confront the person who ghosts you. It’s not your responsibility to teach the ghoster a lesson and make sure that he or she doesn’t hurt anyone else.

Your only responsibility is to forgive the ghoster for your own peace of mind and move forward with your life as if you never got ghosted.

Karma will strike back when it’s time to punish the ghoster and teach him or her valuable life lessons.

Reasons why someone would ghost you on social media

Reasons for ghosting usually stem from childhood. Parents are usually the ones who deliberately or indeliberately (with their actions) teach their children how to behave.

They inculcate their ideas, beliefs, attitudes, and ethics into their offspring and encourage them to copy their demeanors.

These demeanors fortunately or unfortunately (depending on how you look at it) oftentimes stay buried deep inside the children’s subconscious and remain hidden throughout their childhood.

They tend to reveal themselves only when children grow up because that’s when children finally encounter the kind of challenges that their parents went through. They face difficulties and put their parents’ teachings to the test.

The second reason why people ghost others is that ghosters aren’t very thoughtful, sympathetic, and emotionally-strong (in control) people. Again, this is something that usually originates from childhood, but it can also occur later in life.

It can occur at any point in time if people stop growing inward (stop wanting to become emotionally stronger, wiser, maturer, more caring, etc) and put their lives on autopilot.

If they get very stressed or if they meet the wrong person, that person can also have a negative effect on them and indirectly worsen the way they deal with stressors.

But no matter whose fault it is (whether it’s parents, toxic relationships, or stress in life) every healthy adult is responsible for his or her emotional health and personal growth.

It’s our job to regularly identify our shortcomings and continue growing as people.

How to respond to ghosting?

Believe it or not, but the best way to respond to ghosting or any harmful behavior for that matter is to not respond at all. That way, you can keep your dignity, save face—and at the same time, avoid vengeance and provide the ghoster with what he’s asking for – personal space.

You probably don’t want to hear this but lots of space away from you will make the ghoster happier than he’s been in a long time. He’s been bottling up emotions of resentment, suffocation, discontentment, or depression for so long that ghosting will make him feel extremely relieved. It will make him elated.

And that’s perfectly fine!

Don’t think that you should be unhappy and miserable just because the ghoster’s on cloud nine. His happiness may be related to you, but the real reason he’s happy is that he’s been putting ghosting off for so long that he gave himself a temporary elation boost.

Breakups and divorces have the same effect on people as dumpers normally delay the separation and their smothering feelings until the day that they can’t put up with their partner anymore and explode.

So don’t ever take people’s increased happiness for leaving you personally.

Think of it as something that occurs to them naturally when they drop their jar of bottled-up emotions.

Also, keep in mind that ghosters may at any point (before, during, or after ghosting) start to regret how they ended the relationship. They could reach out and apologize for their behavior. But they won’t necessarily regret the fact that they terminated the relationship.

To social media ghosters, their happiness comes way before others which means that other than a little bit of shame and guilt, ghosters almost always feel a weight lifted off their shoulders.

And they feel that way even if they hurt others and made them anxious.

You see, the reason people ghost on social media is that they don’t empathize with their potential victims enough. They don’t think about their actions from their victims’ points of view and try to understand that their victims won’t feel as relieved as they will.

Their victims will instead oftentimes take ghosting on social media very personally and feel hurt by their conversationalists’ sudden disappearance. They’ll wonder what they did wrong.

So be careful how you treat people. Everyone has fears, worries, and occasional anxiety. Don’t make them worse for people by taking them for granted and showing them that they don’t deserve to be treated fairly.

Be careful how you treat people. What you do to others has a funny way of coming back to you.

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If someone ghosted you and stopped returning your calls and messages, it’s evident that he or she doesn’t want to communicate with you any longer. He or she feels that the relationship isn’t healthy or beneficial and that it needs to end.

You as a person who got ghosted need to respect that person’s decision and show self-respect. You need to show it for yourself, for the ghoster, as well as for the people who still respect you.

So respond to social media ghosting the way the most mature and ethical person you know would respond. If that person would walk away with pride and self-respect—and not make things worse, so should you.

You may have to go against your primal instincts and fight your urges, but on the positive note, a little bit of self-control can get you very far in life. It can help you develop yourself into a person who understands that vengeance is for the weak-minded.

Do you now know how to respond to ghosting on social media? Let us know what you think about ghosting and what you’d do/did if you got ghosted.

8 thoughts on “What Is Ghosting On Social Media?”

  1. Hello.My ex ghosted me last Sunday and he was telling me he was unhappy,he didnt think he loves me anymore bc he feels he isnt love in return and that it’s hard for him to not be with me for long (bc of covid) but then we agreed to talk it out the next day .I thought we were okay cus we both said goodnight then the next day I didn’t get a message from him and it took for 3days still no message from him .That’s when I messaged his sister in facebook( his sister doesn’t know me) and i introduced myself and asked if her brother is okay that’s when i think his sister told her and i got a msg from my ex to not to contact his family again bc it’s toxic and despicable he said. And then he deleted his Ig the only platform we communicate.How to recover from this? And there’s no hope for reconciliation regarding this isn’t it?

    1. Jackie Hi . With respect. I want to infrom you that Your right , covid is killing us good and bad everyone facing ,seafaring. You need to clearer perfectly that is she or he really ghosting or it is a oather problem. BC love is the powerful thing in the univers. good and bad everyone have the love. If he don’t love you and you don’t love hem then finding oather person is good and
      If you love hem and he don’t love you then finding oather person is good but if he love you from hes Hb 💗☺💜 . And he using lowquality device , texting lowspeed and any hands problem then you understand that person is a good person but if he and his great grand father was born in India or in the oather similar country’s like India ,BC they have somany bed things like first they collect the blive ,respect,friendship and love then after spend some time they hit from back . And all the perfect pure person get nothing BC of them world is ending BC of them. So please make yourself safe and confirm perfectly and purely and make the world safe .
      Goodbye 🙂☺😊💜

  2. Hi Zan. Thank you for this. I was in a LDR for 4 years and he started acting more distant, then ghosted me after a deployment. He completely cut off contact and then resurfaced with another girlfriend on social media months later. I was devastated and am still dealing with the emotional fallout, but your blog has helped me realize that he has deep emotional issues. Not being able to end a relationship in a mature way in your 40’s is a sign that I am actually lucky to be without him. I just wish I didn’t miss our relationship so much. Hopefully time will heal. I’m just sad that he may be a better version of himself with his new girlfriend.

    1. Hi Mimi.

      It’s possible that your ex fell out of love with you because he’d met someone new. But whether that’s true or not doesn’t really matter. What matters is that he disappeared on you and reappeared with another person as if your relationship never existed.

      Unfortunately, your ex failed to give you the respect that you deserved, so make sure that you now respect yourself twice as much. Leave the guy completely alone (stop looking for him online) and you’ll soon get over her. You’ll find someone who’ll treat you fairly.

      Stay strong, Mimi!
      Zan

  3. It’s such a good and important topic! And I enjoyed every words that you said Zan!
    Really ghosted person shows a lot about they personally.

    Always thankful 🤍

  4. Dear Zan, this post made me feel so much better because I was a victim of being ghosted on social media after a break up. What i had thought all along was nice and good between us, he ended the RS one night i asked him a casual question if hes chatting with other women. He got upset and then refuse to talk more about it or solve the RS like I always tried to/ Then later on i was being ghosted in all socail media apps and I couldnt have felt more hurt , it did question my worth as person to him all these yeas together and up to this day, still couldnt believe he would actually do that to me. I felt much better after reading your post because it opens up my thinking and made me realise what a coward he was.

    1. Hi Liz.

      What your ex did was very inconsiderate of your feelings. All he cared about was his feelings.

      But on the bright side, he showed you exactly who he is at his worst – when he feels trapped. So use this new knowledge against your pain whenever you start to miss him. You have to convince yourself that his dark side is darker than you’d hoped it’d be.

      Best regards,
      Zan

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