When I was going through a breakup, I had trouble finding things to work on during no contact.
Whether you are trying to get back with your ex or move on with your life, you should use this window of opportunity for personal growth.
As long as you are able to admit that you can improve upon yourself, you can always find something positive to work on. Human beings never stop developing and growing unless we get too comfortable.
Imagine just how much you can change for the better if you actually try.
Breakups are highly emotional stages of our lives and can be used as a springboard to leap to a higher level.
If your ex broke up with you, there are clearly things that he or she found lacking in you.
And that’s what we’re going to talk about in this article.
What should you do in no contact right after the breakup?
Most of the time, your ex won’t tell you what he or she perceives as your shortcomings, so you need to figure them out for yourself. Once you’ve identified your shortcomings, you can take a step toward becoming a better version of yourself.
Don’t worry about exactly what to do for now. The first thing on your mind should be getting through a hard time and making yourself feel better.
I suggest you sign up for the gym to get your endorphins running, which will soothe your anxiety tremendously. Also, talk to your friends and family and lean on them for support, until you are strong enough to deal with the post-breakup blues on your own.
What to do in no contact once you have regained your composure?
When you no longer feel really down, you should see the things that went wrong in the relationship. Don’t blame yourself for the words you said or the things you’ve done.
This isn’t going to contribute to your recovery in any way. As a matter of fact, It’s only going to slow you down.
Recognizing and taking responsibility for the mistakes you’ve made is the first step toward correcting them.
Once you begin taking the appropriate action, your brain will begin to rewire bad behavioral patterns and rewrite the unwanted demeanor with a new and improved one.
Here are some important things to do in no contact:
- Learn to control your emotions. Sign up for anger management, do meditation, yoga, exercises and talk to a lot of people about it. Challenge yourself to control your temper every time you feel your blood starting to boil. I suggest wearing a bracelet meant for this one purpose so you are constantly reminded of your change.
- Stop bad habits and form new routines. Do a 66-day challenge to break a bad pattern, such as (being active, interrupting conversations, biting your nails, cracking knuckles, being late all the time). Form new routines, such as getting out of bed early, reading a book a week, studying in the morning, greeting people politely, working out regularly, socializing often…)
- Work on your bad personality traits, such as impatience (volunteer working with the elderly), stubbornness (let others have their way, even when you are wrong), laziness (challenge yourself to be proactive and clean the house, help a friend with homework, go for a jog, reconnect with old friends…)
- Work on your good traits. Why not make yourself even more attractive by becoming even better at what you already do well? Work harder at work and you might even get a promotion. If you are very considerate of others, become even more. Are you friendly and respectful, kind and gracious? Do you always make sure others are content around you?
There are no limits to your growth. Human beings have an amazing ability to change and adapt. Push yourself out of your comfort zone and become the person you truly wish to be.
Push yourself out of your comfort zone. Changing your personality traits is no easy task. “Luckily” you have the push behind the breakup, giving you that extra boost forward, helping you reach your goal.
Use this opportunity to truly work on yourself to become unrecognizable to yourself.
Don’t worry about becoming someone you are not, as you are merely correcting your bad behavior and solidifying your strong points.
If your strategy is implemented correctly, these changes are the solution to making your ex turn his or her head towards you.
What you need is patience, perseverance and time, and you will without a doubt achieve your goals.
Your ex is never going to give you another chance if he or she sees that you are still the same old you.
That’s why I reiterate that winning your ex back starts with you. You need to become someone your ex would be happy and proud to be with. You already intrigued your ex once. You can do it the second time.
Get ready and be prepared by the time your ex reaches out so you know what to do after no contact when your ex contacts you.
What have you been doing in no contact? Share your thoughts with us in the comment section below.
My name is Zan and I’m the founder of Magnet of Success. I enjoy writing realistic relationship and breakup articles and helping readers heal and grow. With more than 5 years of experience in the self-improvement, relationship, and breakup sphere, my goal is to provide advice that fosters positivity and success and avoids preventable mistakes and pain. Buy me a coffee, learn more about me, or get in touch today.
