It’s quite common for people to block their exes, friends, and those they don’t like. Blocking lets them shut people out of their lives without having to continue to engage in conversations they don’t want to participate in.
But just because it takes only a few seconds to block someone, that doesn’t mean they should use it as a self-defense mechanism.
Not unless their health and well-being depend on it. In that case, blocking is probably the right thing to do because it helps them protect themselves and their loved ones.
But for most people, blocking is unnecessary and quite disrespectful. I’ll probably get backlash for this, but blocking is something those who can’t control their emotions and sometimes actions do. It’s a malicious deed hurt people do out of anger, annoyance, and contempt.
Very few people block others just because they’re done with that person and think it’s better not to communicate. I’m willing to bet that most people make emotional decisions to block others. They’re fed up with them, so they think and feel they can be happier on their own.
But if there’s one thing I’ve learned is that each of us is responsible for the way we think and feel. Others’ actions can affect us negatively, of course, but they’re not the reason we feel the way they do. It’s our perceptions that are to blame because they help us interpret people’s words, actions, and expectations.
Emotions that cause us to block others are usually:
- disgust
- anger
- suffocation
- jealousy
- envy
- fear
Blocking someone just because we don’t like him or her may not always be necessary because human beings have an exceptional ability to communicate their wants and needs. We can express ourselves better than any other being on the planet and can, therefore, tell people what bothers us and why it bothers us.
In most cases, we can ask people not to reach out to us and explain to them why it’s important for us (and perhaps even them) not to communicate anymore.
But if we can do all these things, why don’t we tell people that we don’t want to communicate? Why resort to blocking?
Well, some people do communicate and are quite polite and successful at it.
Others, though, not so much. They’re afraid of telling people that they don’t want them in their lives anymore because they’re afraid of their reactions. This is why they choose not to communicate at all. They let their actions do the talking for them and immediately feel relieved.
And that’s not good because not every person that gets blocked is bad. Not every person is unworthy of an explanation of what he or she had done wrong and why you don’t want to communicate anymore.
Look, I get it. Sometimes people can be strange and should be more mature and self-aware of their behavior. We tend not to want to associate with such people because the thought of engaging in random fruitless conversations with them drains our energy and forces us to respond just because it’s polite and respectful.
But if we understand why people are reaching out to us and want to speak to us, then perhaps we can see that they mean no harm and that they’re just being their usual selves for which they needn’t be punished (get blocked). They need to understand what they did or didn’t do so they can improve that about themselves and do better next time.
I’m not saying you need to let go of negative perceptions of people who hurt you, disrespect you, belittle you, use you, and make you feel like conversations with them aren’t going anywhere. But you shouldn’t give those people the ability to manipulate your feelings and make you act on them.
That will give them control over you and make you into a reactive person.
The topic of this post is how to react when someone blocks you.
How to react when someone blocks you?
When someone you like or don’t like blocks your number, Facebook, Whatsapp, or anywhere you can be blocked, don’t retaliate by blocking that person back. Blocking a blocker is not only unnecessary but also childish and highly reactive.
You won’t achieve anything by blocking someone who blocks you other than proving that he or she elicited a reaction from you and made you sink to his or her level. Of course, the blocker won’t know this because he or she won’t see what you did, but this isn’t even about the blocker. It’s about you because you’ll remember what you did for quite some time.
You’ll remember that the person blocking you brought out the worst in you and that you’re both in the same boat now. You both controlled each other’s ways of thinking and behaving and acted like zombies.🧟♀️🧟♂️I don’t know what you call that, but I call it emotional slavery. There’s probably not much worse you can do than to give someone (you don’t like) the key to your brain.
My question to you is if you wouldn’t give the person in question the key to your home, would you give him or her free entry to your mind? You probably wouldn’t, right? So let’s not react to someone blocking you by blocking that person back. There are better ways to react when someone blocks you.
And that way is not to react at all! Instead of doing something impulsive, give it a few days (a week if it was your ex who blocked you) and you’ll see that whatever you’re thinking of doing now you won’t think of doing later.
Negative self-destructive ideas will disappear because you’ll stop feeling hurt, abandoned, unwanted, and disrespected and stop thinking and wanting to react with a bruised ego. Getting some space from a highly emotional situation will help you relax and see that you don’t need to fight fire with fire.
You can use water, handle the situation maturely, and respect yourself for doing the right thing.
Some people can’t handle being blocked, so they find a way to angrily reach out to the person blocking them and demand answers. They want to know why they got blocked and throw tantrums about it. This only makes the person blocking them want to speak with them less and destroys whatever is left of the relationship.
So if you want to know how to react when someone blocks you, start by learning how not to react. Learn that reacting with anger and hurt ego will make things much worse as it will confront and pressure the person blocking you and make you into a highly reactive person.
You’ll essentially fail to control negative emotions and have a harder time regaining control over unwanted thoughts and emotions in the future.
Here are my tips on how to react when someone blocks you.
Be the bigger person no matter what!
Being the bigger means doing the right thing even when someone disrespects you and doesn’t act the way you want him or her to act. Sometimes ignoring mean behavior and turning the other cheek is necessary and more self-respectful than you think.
When you let people exhaust themselves and leave your life on their own, you let them hurt themselves (their self-development). You essentially keep your conscience free of guilt and responsibility and move on with an understanding that you did your best.
If you get angry and take revenge, however, you may indeed teach that person a valuable lesson, but that won’t make your life any better. Sacrificing yourself for a person who doesn’t care about you and matter to you will just make things more difficult for you because it will ruin your karma.
So if you’re angry with someone who blocked you and you want to punish him or her, do that by withdrawing from the situation and letting him or her remain the same behaviorally while you learn from the situation and sharpen your self-control.
You probably haven’t thought of it this way, but everything impulsive people and life throw at you is an opportunity for you to practice self-awareness and self-control. They’re chances for you to grow immensely (more than you would under normal conditions). So learn the things you can from bad experiences and let people who mistreat you ignore their lessons and anger people who won’t be as tolerant as you.
When they do, they’ll get hit by karma and suffer.
The best revenge isn’t retaliation. It’s letting people dig their own graves while you learn from their malicious actions and be happier and more successful because of them. If you can do that, I guarantee that you won’t be upset about someone blocking you. You’ll be thankful to him or her because you’ll have improved yourself and also get rid of a person who wasn’t good for you and meant to stay in your life.
So if you’re wondering how to react when someone blocks you, choose not to react emotionally and immaturely. Acknowledge that the girl or guy blocking you has associated unhealthy thoughts and emotions with you and that he or she is reacting to them rather than controlling them.
That doesn’t mean you should respond by acting on your emotions just like him/her. That would be impulsive and unproductive. It’d show you have an eye for an eye mentality and that you haven’t developed sufficient emotional intelligence yet.
You need to understand that in this world, excuses like “He made me do it” are invalid. They are unreasonable because no one makes you do anything. People may make you feel a certain way because you haven’t trained your mind or because that person crossed the line, but when it comes to taking action, everyone has a choice. The only people who don’t are those who don’t understand themselves and tend to react to stressors and problems.
Think about that if you’re hurting and contemplating how to react when a person blocks you.
Forgive everyone, including yourself
Resenting people and/or reacting to them with fury and destruction doesn’t hurt others. It hurts you because you give them a spot in your heart and validate them. You tell them that they matter enough for you to get upset and waste your time with them.
So if you want the best for yourself, your family members, friends, and your romantic partner, forgive people for doing and saying mean things. Forgive those who used, abused, betrayed, and mistreated you and tell yourself that their actions don’t define you and mean you’re unworthy of love and respect.
Remind yourself that most people don’t even know why they do the things they do because they don’t understand themselves. They just behave instinctually due to an underdeveloped understanding of their surroundings.
You don’t need to punish them for being ignorant and underdeveloped. Pity them instead because they have a lot of work to do on themselves. They have to discover they aren’t perfect and then figure out why they’re behind growth-wise.
This means they haven’t even developed the self-awareness that would allow them to reflect on their behaviors and improve them. They still primitively blame others and refuse to take responsibility.
You can’t help people like that. You can’t help them because they don’t want help. They want to be left alone to continue to think negatively and feel negative emotions. Negative thoughts and emotions give them strength and block out unwanted people and experiences they have with those people.
So if you’re not sure what to think of a guy or woman who blocks you for any reason at all, know that his or her blocking doesn’t define you as a person. Blocking says more about the person blocking you than it does about you.
Some people can’t handle their own emotions and look to build themselves up by tearing down, blaming, and judging others. It’s better for you that such people block you and prevent themselves from getting close to you.
Did you learn how to react when someone blocks you? If you have anything to add, comment below with your explanations and ideas.
And if you’d like to talk about your situation with us, visit our coaching page for more information.
My name is Zan and I’m the founder of Magnet of Success. I enjoy writing realistic relationship and breakup articles and helping readers heal and grow. With more than 5 years of experience in the self-improvement, relationship, and breakup sphere, my goal is to provide advice that fosters positivity and success and avoids preventable mistakes and pain. Buy me a coffee, learn more about me, or get in touch today.
The author’s unique approach encourages self-reflection and personal growth, emphasizing the importance of empathy and understanding. The article provides valuable insights and practical tips that can help individuals navigate the complexities of being blocked, fostering healthier relationships and cultivating a positive mindset. I appreciate the article’s positive tone and empowering message, reminding readers that there are always opportunities for personal development and improved communication, even in difficult circumstances.
Hi Alan.
People need to know they get to decide how to respond to difficult stuations. It can feel tempting to listen to emotions and do the first thing that makes sense, but that usually doesn’t encourage growth and morality. On the contrary, it makes people stagnate or in some cases, regress.
Sincerely,
Zan
I agree that in most cases – if you’re dealing with someone rational who can regulate themselves and actually listens to what you’re saying – it isn’t necessary to block, and you can keep the person in your life. But if you try several times to tell the person to please leave you alone, that you need space, that they’re contacting you far too often, that their behaviour is inappropriate and makes you uncomfortable – and they still don’t listen – then you don’t have much choice. I had to do this recently. I decided I was going to repeat the message yet again, ask them not to respond, and block them if they did. They responded, and I blocked them. I wish I had blocked them earlier. I feel safer and happier to have them out of my life.
I agree with you Min.
At some point, you need to put yourself first and block exes who don’t care or know what they’re doing to you. This is especially true if you’ve told them a few times to stop reaching out.
Sincerely,
Zan
you never disappointed me with any of your articles
And there are many things that I learned from you, but one most important part is that each of us is responsible for the way we think and feel.
Always grateful for your kindness and help 🤍
Hi Linda.
Each one of us is responsible for what’s happening within us. We need to take this seriously by developing self-awareness and self-control. That way, we can avoid hurting ourselves and others.
Sincerely,
Zan
Hi Zan. Here I am again. Another good piece of advice.
I was blocked. After months of a break up. I don’t like blocking or being blocked. It feels very hurtful. To block and be blocked. It shouldn’t matter I suppose. But personally, I believe it’s hurtful and unnecessary. Unless of course there’s harrassment or threats. All bets are off. That’s stalking. And unfortunately the authorities need to get involved.
So, my ex blocks me. Months after the break up. I did look at one of her IG stories a couple of days beforehand. Maybe that’s why.
I did react. I reached out to ask why. She’s very polite. Nothing bad came of it. Thankfully. It was all a reaction of emotions on my part.
I felt better afterwards. But now that time has past I see the better thing to do is follow the above advice. It really is the best thing to do. You help yourself to move on, get back together, gain self respect, build emotional strength and maturity. It helps in every way.
I did react though. But sometimes you need to make mistakes. Learn the lessons from first hand experience. Great life experience. Learning relationship dynamics.
Thank you for the support.
Juan Zapata
Hi Juan.
You made a mistake, but it wasn’t the worst one because you weren’t dying for recognition. Your ex also responded politely, so you got a bit lucky there. Try to stay in no contact now, okay?
Sometimes dumpees act on emotions and get hurt. They need to make sure they remain in control of their emotions as much as possible so they don’t suffocate their exes and bring a bad reaction out of them.
Best regards,
Zan
My ex blocked me, later about 10 months later she unblocked me, she wrote me saying “I hope you understood that the block was a good option for both of us, maybe in a few years we can be friends” she never apologized, it was the best for her , not for me. It’s been 8 months since that time I heard from her, I responded as you teach, being respectful and answering in the same emotional tone without breaking or blocking, I said Ok that’s fine, I understand. But no Zan, here I am, still hurt, and my ex is still with his new partner, I think it’s been a year now. Every day it’s in my head. Believe me that I make an effort, sport, work and personal growth. I read your articles, I’ve tried dating, but I never feel a connection like I did with this demon. My ex is happy, she loves her partner, and I think of these people every day, and I won’t lie to her, I would like to see her come back to me, I would like to tell her that she hurt me, and I feel sad because after so long I still want to talk to her again. I keep in touch 0, you say it’s the best I can do, but after all this time, it seems that she never wants to hear from me again. Anyway, I appreciate reading it, it is a calm for my disordered emotions. How to recover the love of my life when she is with the love of hers. But I will follow your advice, I will continue to distance myself. Thanks brother. I wish you could give me some advice.
Hi Pete.
First of all, the new guy’s been with her for about a year, so he’s not the love of her life. She’s not yours either because those things don’t exist. Your ex did you dirty, Pete. She showed you how little respect she had for someone who loved her and wanted the best for her. You need to remind yourself frequently that she’s not your ideal partner. Deep inside, you know what she’s capable of as you’ve called her a demon. You probably mean that she isn’t as empathetic as you would like her to be and quite frankly, that she’s not worth your time. You just need a bit more time to detach, Pete. Once you do, she’s history.
Kind regards,
Zan
Hello
I was blocked last night by my new friend after him and I got into a fight last night. And him and I are not in a relationship by the way. But he did unblock me after I got ahold of his friend about it just to keep making him unblock me. I was also blocked twice by a girl who used to be my friend back then but I’m not friends with her anymore. But my new friend told me he’ll block me permanently if I act badly in front of him or whatever again but he can’t do that or block me in any other way! And the same rule goes for other people in my life!
In my case, I just didn’t want to hear from her ever again. It was just a mechanism to make sure she knows that. I wrote a script that sends her a email telling her she is blocked. That she could find a new email to get around it, once, apparently wasn’t known to her.
So I disagree to a point. It was simple a way to end all communication, period.
Hi DT.
If you blocked her first, telling her you won’t communicate with her ever again was a strong and polite thing to do. But if she blocked you first, then telling her that served no purpose.
Best regards,
Zan